


Three Wishes

by imaginentertain



Category: Glee
Genre: AU, Famous!Kurt, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-28
Updated: 2012-09-27
Packaged: 2017-12-31 06:42:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 54,168
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1028513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imaginentertain/pseuds/imaginentertain
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>If Blaine Anderson found a magic lamp he'd only ask for two things. He'd wish for a place at NYADA when he graduates high school, and he'd wish that Kurt Hummel was his boyfriend. There were three problems with this. Firstly, competition for NYADA was insane. Secondly, Kurt Hummel didn't even know he existed. Movie stars tended to be like that about their fans. Thirdly, Blaine didn't have a magic lamp.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

[ ](http://imaginentertain.livejournal.com/pics/catalog/483/1516)

(cover by the awesome [Becky](http://buckeyegrrl.tumblr.com) who puts up with me more than she probably should...)

**The First Wish**

 

If Blaine Anderson found a magic lamp he'd only ask for two things. He'd wish for a place at NYADA when he graduates high school, and he'd wish that Kurt Hummel was his boyfriend. There were three problems with this. Firstly, competition for NYADA was insane. Secondly, Kurt Hummel didn't even know he existed. Movie stars tended to be like that about their fans. Thirdly, Blaine didn't have a magic lamp.

This, he informed his long-suffering best friend Rachel, was the only real flaw in his plans. As soon as he found that magic lamp he'd have his two wishes, then give her his third. She alternated between wanting a place at NYADA for herself and wanting a boyfriend because "the only other real option is Puck and after he got Quinn pregnant..." he wasn't a suitable candidate for her.

Apparently the male pickings at McKinley were slim. Mike was dating Tina, for over a year now and still going strong; Artie was in the year below them and it would be "unfair" to leave him behind when she moved on to greater things. Puck's history was questionable and after Quinn's fall from grace Rachel had no intention of going there with him. Ever. There were a couple of other guys in the glee club but they didn't share her passion for it, to them this was a bit of fun and the chance at a bit of glory that was only usually reserved for the football team or cheerleading squad.

Which left Blaine, her "best gay" and platonic soul mate, the only person she could see being in her life for the rest of.

Rachel Berry was destined to be single (and a virgin) until she left school and she was fine with that because she was in the same situation as Blaine.

Who wasn't exactly OK with it himself but when you were the only openly gay kid in the school it didn't exactly leave you with many options. There had been rumours of a gay kid at Dalton but when Blaine tried to sneak in and check out the Warblers last year (and quickly been caught – he was a very bad spy) they'd told him that the only openly gay member they'd had had left over a year ago, having helped them to win Nationals, and nothing more was said on the matter. Story of Blaine's life; a little too late for everything.

College though, that would be different. New York with all its promise and opportunities. He was aiming for NYADA but he'd be happy with NYU or Columbia. His brother had a saying – well, he had several but this was the only one that made any sense.

"Aim for the moon, B. If you fail then you'll land among the stars."

Blaine had tried to point out that the stars were further away than the moon, but then Cooper had made a quip about Blaine wanting to land on one star in particular and he'd flush red so hard and for so long their mom had thought he was running a fever.

Trouble was Coop was right. Blaine had it bad. He was in love with Kurt Hummel, had been for years. Ever since his first movie fifteen months ago Blaine had been completely head over heels with him. Not only was he stunning and talented (and his _voice_ – Blaine fell in love with him the first time he heard Kurt sing and he never wanted to get over that) but he was gay. Kurt was gay and he was out and he was gay and he was proud and he was _gay_. The jocks at the school seemed to be OK with this because for once there was a young actor who didn't make all teens look like drink, drug and sex obsessed groupies. The fact that he was gay was almost like a footnote, like they knew he was a person first.

Since Kurt Hummel became a name Blaine's slushies and dumpster tosses had significantly lessened as they seemed to apply the same logic to him. (This had also happened after Puck and Mike joined the glee club last year and brought some of the football team around but Blaine's whole being was geared around Kurt.) He was starting to feel like a person first, his sexuality was way down the list of concerns but he wasn't so deluded as to think that they were OK with it. He kept his head down, didn't draw attention to the fact that he was... y'know ...and aside from his locker you never would have guessed he was any different to anyone else. It wasn't perfect but all Blaine Anderson had to do was survive the next two years of school and then he'd be out of here and he'd make it just fine.

After all, Kurt made it so why couldn't he? Fine, he was a New Yorker and not from some small town in Ohio, but that wasn't stopping Blaine. Rachel once joked that if Blaine got an A on a test he'd attribute it to Kurt. (He did once get an A with an oral presentation on gay representation on the media, in which Kurt had featured pretty heavily, so in a way Rachel had been right.)

Whenever a new interview or picture came out Blaine would "check out" (Mike's words) for a bit and so Rachel and Mike would just sit and watch him, smile and wait for it to pass. They didn't dare imagine what would happen if Blaine ever got to meet Kurt, grateful for the fact that it was never going to happen.

*

By the time Blaine had returned to the conversation (turned out it was an old article – the one where Kurt joked about the fact he was almost old enough to play a high school student now that he was almost 18) Rachel was going on to the gathered Juniors about college applications. Again.

"I know we don't have to apply until next year," she said, "but we both know how intense NYADA's process is. The play this year was a huge success—"

"As were you," Blaine said, recognising his cue to insert a comment.

"Thank you," she smiled. "But only because you were my leading man."

Blaine smiled in return and allowed her to continue.

"We stand a good chance at Regionals this year; Vocal Adrenaline didn't even make it through their Sectionals and from what Blaine said about the Warblers I think that our flare and originality will make us a shoe in..."

Blaine tuned out again, letting Rachel go on and make plans around and without him. He'd spent his Sophomore and the few months so far of this one learning how to deal with her and part of that was to just let her get on with things once she got an idea in her head. And if he was going to survive their senior year together then he'd need to reserve something for the fights he wanted to win.

Like if she tried to take his hair gel away again.

*

Nothing good ever happened in January, Blaine decided. It was just as dark and cold as the previous month but the joys of Christmas and New Year had gone. This time last year he'd come down badly with the 'flu, but that had been an improvement on the previous year when he'd been put in hospital by... Well. Suffice to say that a six week hospital stay and months of rehab afterwards meant that he was happy to accept the condition of repeating his sophomore year if it meant he was away from those narrow-minded jocks.

Not that McKinley didn't have them, but Blaine felt that slushies and dumpsters were a preferable alternative to baseball bats and football cleats.

Besides, McKinley had a glee club, newly resurrected by someone Blaine strongly suspected of reliving his glory days, and so Blaine had auditioned, along with a varied group of others, and quickly found himself the male lead opposite one Broadway-bound Rachel Berry. A Broadway-bound friend who'd made him realise that this was something he could do, something he was good at as well, and the two of them made a pact; _Broadway or bust_.

This year, however, January seemed to be a bit quieter. It was as if the Universe had decided that two years of misery was enough and he could have a break. The run up to Christmas had been manic; winning Sectionals, Artie's Christmas special on PBS (although playing Rachel's husband hadn't exactly been a highlight of the night), and the first New Year where his parents didn't invite over friends who just somehow surprisingly happen to have a single daughter about his age.

When 31 January 2012 came around Blaine allowed himself to think that nothing bad was going to happen to him this year.

Then his phone rang.

*

"Hey, squirt."

"I'm hanging up now."

"You'll regret it if you do," Cooper teased.

Blaine sighed. "Give me one reason why."

"Because I'm coming back to Ohio. To Lima, actually."

"You're coming home? Why would that lead to regret? And I thought you were about to start filming a new movie."

"I am, it will and I am."

"What?"

"I'm filming the movie in Ohio. In Lima. In March."

"Hollywood's filming a movie in Lima? Why?"

"Because they wanted a high school and I talk about you all the time—"

"Really?"

"...No, but the point is they agreed to film this high school movie in Lima. At your school actually."

"So you're going to be filming at my school?"

"Mainly evenings and weekends, maybe some of your spring break but according to my schedule I should be done by then. I play this new teacher who makes a connection with this troubled soul of a kid and I'm the only one who can get through to him but that's not the best part."

"What's the best part?"

"Kurt Hummel's playing that kid."

*

Blaine wanted to tell EVERYONE. He wanted to call Rachel and Mike and call them out on the fact that they'd said he'd never meet Kurt. He wanted to tell every person who'd mocked his childish crush and say that his brother, his very own Hollywood actor brother was going to work with him and now Kurt was coming to his school and they'd meet and hang out and then of course Kurt would fall in love with him and oh god what if he hated him and they had nothing to talk about and he thought that Blaine was just some creepy stalker fan of which he probably had a million and he totally had security, didn't he, and Blaine would be kicked out of school for the duration of filming because there was no way they'd risk letting this crazed teenage fan anywhere near the successful and talented Kurt Hummel and now Blaine couldn't breathe...

It took over half an hour for him to calm down enough to text Rachel who, true to form, called him almost immediately.

"Did you have a vivid dream again?" she asked. "I told you, napping in the day is disorientating."

"I wasn't dreaming, Rach," he said. "Cooper's new film is coming to Lima and Kurt's got the lead role. He's coming here, Rachel. I'm actually going to meet him."

"Are you OK? You sound a little... breathless."

"I may or may not have had a minor panic attack earlier," Blaine confessed. "Blame me?"

"Does Kurt know?"

"What?"

"Has Cooper told him about you? That he's coming to the school of his biggest fan?"

"I... don't know."

"I'm sure it'll be fine."

"You think so?" Blaine asked.

"I don't know," she laughed. "Ask me I think he'll be flattered. I mean who else would have tracked down that European indie film but his biggest fan?"

"How do you manage to make it sound... creepy?" Blaine asked.

"I like to think of it as creative," she replied. "You're a fan, Blaine, everyone knows it. You think Kurt won't find out how much the second he arrives? He'll be mobbed and someone's going to mention you, if it's not Cooper then it'll be someone else."

"Oh god, he's going to think I'm a freak."

"You are," Rachel said affectionately, "but the good kind. I'm sure he knows the difference."

"You and Mike need to make sure I don't make a fool of myself."

"Oh Blaine," Rachel sighed. "If you want me to run interference you know I will, if you want me to cover for you as you come down with the 'flu, bird or Spanish – your choice, then I will. We both will, you know that. But I know you better than that."

"Do you now?"

"You want to meet him, don't you?"

"I have for the last year."

"So I guess we need to come up with a plan of action."

"What?"

"You're going to need a distraction to get past set security."

"You are not going to belt out some show tune," Blaine warned.

"But—"

"And you're not going to make Mike do some big dance display either."

"So what's your grand plan then?" she challenged.

"I've only just regained the ability to breathe," he pointed out, "give me a minute."

"Well you have almost two months' worth of minutes," Rachel said. "We'll strategise tomorrow."

"Rach?"

"Yeah?"

"Love you."

"Love you too," she said and Blaine could hear the smile on the other end of the line. "But not enough to bail you out if you get arrested, understand?"

"Fine," he laughed.

*

Blaine wasn't alone in his feelings. Half of the students in the school were excited about their chances to meet real-life Hollywood stars and when the cast list was announced Blaine suddenly found himself the centre of attention when people connected the Cooper Anderson on that list to the Blaine Anderson in their midst. Soon he was being asked to get autographs and photos and meetings and in one case a senior girl asked him to arrange a very _private_ session with his big brother which had led to Blaine paling so much that people around him had been worried about him passing out.

Truth be told, Blaine was glad for the distraction. The less time he spent dreaming of Kurt was more time he could spend focusing on other things. Like Regionals. They had barely scraped by with their win at Sectionals and so every effort was being made to ensure this time would be different. He was supposed to take lead vocals with Rachel again but most of the Glee rehearsals were spent arguing for Mike and Brittany's dance skills to be given more focus than they were already. Rachel, of course, wanted nothing to detract from her performance. This was her first big competition (half the Glee club had then pointed out it was the first big competition for all of them) and she wanted to shine. She wanted them to shine.

"We need to be thinking about NYADA, Blaine," she said at the end of a very long and very tiring rehearsal. "This Fall we'll be applying and I want to put on there that we lead our Glee club to Nationals, _Nationals_ , Blaine, in its very first year."

"I understand," he said tactfully, "but if we win—"

"When," Rachel corrected.

"—then it will be because we did it as a team. We need twelve members to compete, Rach. You upset any one of them and they quit—"

"They won't," she said with an air of certainty that Blaine had to wonder at. "Look, Mike and Brittany know that they'll get a chance to... do their thing. Just not in front of us, OK? Santana, Puck, Artie and Tina, they're all good singers but let's be honest here. They're not our level of good. They will be, one day if they want it. But you and I have been in training for this since we were kids. This is all we have ever wanted and it's all we have ever worked for. And Artie and Tina are only Sophomores so when we're setting New York alight they can lead our successful little club and we will know that it's in good hands."

"You have given this far too much thought," Blaine muttered to himself. "What about the others? Sam and Lauren and—"

"What do you want me to do?" Rachel asked. "Give it all up so everyone can sing a line, in turn, and just hope that the judges like a variety act? We want to win this or we don't and if you want to win something then you play your best team."

"That sounds suspiciously like a football thing."

Rachel shrugged. "We do have a number of football players on the team. It's hard not to pick something up."

"Rachel Berry, tell me you're not going to fall for some... quarterback," Blaine laughed.

"Have you seen our players?" she laughed in return. "I have about as much chance of falling for a football player as you do of... I don't know, getting a date with Kurt Hummel."

"You never know," Blaine said, shouldering his book bag, "he might read my letter and be so overcome with its emotion and honesty that he just has to meet me, and once that happens who knows where it might lead."

"A restraining order?"

"I thought you were my friend!"

"I'm your best friend," she said, linking her arm with his, "which is why it's my duty to tell you that you're getting obsessed. He's a celebrity."

"Cooper—"

"Is just another actor playing a part opposite him. How many of them do you think Kurt's had? Do you think he remembers them all? And if he does remember his co-stars, would that extend to one's little brother who is probably working out some plan about how he's going to sneak onto the set? You heard Principal Figgins. They're filming after school and at weekends and when they are here at the same time we are that part of the school will be closed off and security will be all over the place.

"Please don't get arrested. I'm not going to New York without you and NYADA won't look at you if you've been charged with stalking or harassment or kidnapping."

"I'm not going to _kidnap_ him!"

"Look, I know what it's like, OK? Once upon a time I thought Taylor Lautner was pretty hot—"

"He still is," Blaine protested.

"—but if he walked up to me now and offered to whisk me away somewhere then I'd have to say, 'No, Taylor, I'm sorry but my Glee club needs me. I have a trophy to win'."

" _We_ have a trophy to win," Blaine corrected but he knew Rachel wasn't listening.

"My point is, Blaine, that some things are more important. And you can't go wishing your life away on someone who realistically is never going to want you, not in the same way you want them. And I know it's hard, being the only... one here," she said tactfully, "but things will be different in New York and I promise, there's someone out there who will love you as much as you love them."

"Just not Kurt Hummel?"

"Sorry." She gave him a small smile and then tugged on his arm. "Coffee? My treat?"

"I should be getting home," Blaine said. "Mom and Dad are going a bit spring clean crazy with Cooper coming home. I have to go and sort out my room, though I have no idea why."

"I'm sorry, Blaine, I really am. I know how much you want to meet Kurt and I hope that you get the chance. I just... don't think you should pin all your dreams on it. Be realistic about things."

"Like you being realistic about us going to Nationals?" he joked.

"That's different," Rachel declared as they walked out of school. "I know we're good enough to be the best."

*

February _dragged_ – Blaine couldn't even bring himself to enjoy his favourite holiday despite his perpetual single nature (what? he was a romantic and always would be. Besides, he loved sending anonymous Valentines to those kids who never seemed to get noticed because for one day they walked around with a smile on their face and Blaine liked that he got to do that for them.) – and when March came around he found himself staring at his wall calendar, the days marked off until that first day of shooting. Cooper was due in a few days before and whenever he was unable to contain his excitement it was easily attributed to his brother's return.

He wanted to ask about the chances of being on set when Kurt was there but as soon as the movie became public knowledge Principal Figgins had called a special assembly.

"Students," he'd said, "it has come to my attention that due to the social sites of Tweet-er and Facetimebook you are aware of the movie being filmed at McKinley High this spring. I must inform you that the filming will be going on after school and security will be in place to stop any of you sneaking in or stalking the actors. I will not have any of my students selling stories to the press in some misguided attempt at becoming famous! Believe me, you don't get paid as much as you want, and the restraining orders can make life and out-of-state travel very hard indeed."

But, Blaine reasoned, he had opportunities the others didn't. If his brother invited him on set, well – that wasn't stalking was it? If he was hanging out with his older brother who worked in an industry that had close ties to the one that Blaine was interested in, well – that was just experience gathering. A real film set, real actors and a director and everything else. And if he just happened to run into Kurt while he was there, well – that was nothing more than fate.

He knew Cooper would have a filming schedule so it would just be a case of working out when the two of them would be on set and then arranging visits. A plan so simple it couldn't help but be a success.

*

It wasn't.

"Sure I can get you on set," Cooper grinned when Blaine asked him, "but only the days when it's just me or some of the minor stars. Some policy or whatever, can't have you sneaking pictures of the other lead actors and selling them to the press."

"Oh, right," Blaine said, his face falling along with his stomach.

"It wasn't just me, was it, B?"

"I just..."

"Kurt," Cooper said simply. "Thought so."

"How'd you know?"

"Because he's the kid making it OK for kids to be gay these days and you... well, you've had it rough."

"I just want to meet him, just once. Thirty seconds and I don't care if he's surrounded by security."

"I'd love to help you out, squirt—"

"Coop, please. This could be my one chance to meet him. He saved my life—"

"That's a bit dramatic, Blaine—"

"No it's not," Blaine snapped. "You've seen the interviews, you've heard his soundbites. Even here, Cooper, they're played here. And people know what it's like to be bullied because of your sexuality and they know how horrific it can be... He talked about one of his old high schools; two years where he was a target. His parents pulled him out, sent him to a private school but then he got discovered. You know he said that he'd have to have one hell of a good reason to ever go back to high school? People made his life hell, comments and looking the other way when things happened.

"McKinley wasn't that great before I went there but because of Kurt it's better. Because some of the seniors that year loved his stuff and took his message to heart and now it's the role of every senior class to look out for those bullies and deal with it.

"You can't tell me I'm being dramatic when I say he saved my life, Cooper. He did and I just want one chance to tell him that. Just one. Thirty seconds, I promise."

"Look," Cooper sighed, "I'm not promising anything. But if all you want is a meet 'n' greet then... There's no harm in asking."

"So you'll do it?"

"Me? No," Cooper said. "I think it needs to come from you. What you said? Write him a letter or something. That way I can give it to him and he can make up his own mind in his own time."

"Thank you," Blaine said, throwing his arms around Cooper's neck in a hug. His big brother laughed and returned it just as tight. "It's good to have you home again."

"Good to be home," Cooper said.

*

Blaine had been drafting this letter in his head for months now but when he came to write it he was struck by the worst case of writer's block he'd ever had. Which was stupid, he thought, because he should so be able to do this. He knew Kurt Hummel. Well, knew all about him.

Kurt's website bio proclaimed him to be a New York boy, recognised when he was attending a private high school (which wasn't named to protect the friends he still had there). After completing his sophomore year and being snapped up, he went to Los Angeles, just to test the water, but the summer indie movie he did was such a hit that Kurt never went back to school. (He is working with a tutor because 'Education is important'.) After that there was another indie which was huge in Europe, then there were the two blockbusters, one of which was financed heavily by the British Film Institute, which were everywhere last year, garnering him a range of nominations and even a couple of wins. He'd done guest roles on TV, recorded a voice over for an animated show which would air some time this summer, and was fitting in so much work that it was hard to work out when he did normal things like sleep and eat.

Blaine followed him on Twitter and Facebook, had signed up to his email list as soon as it became available, and he had stared at the contact address on his official website for so long that he knew it off by heart.

So many people sent fan letters, he reasoned, it isn't weird. He would be just another letter, just another fan, and Blaine would be able to tell Kurt exactly what he'd done for him. He would, if he'd ever got around to writing the damn thing.

Blaine even had a few pictures up in his locker, along with a printed out version of a single word Kurt had handwritten and Tweeted about. There had been an update just before school started back in which Kurt had talked about being out and proud and what it meant. He said that to face up to the things and the people in this life that want to shut you down takes one thing. That to follow your dreams and to be who you are takes one thing. He carried this card around with him as a sign of how to live his life.

_Courage_.

Taking a deep breath to try and locate the last shreds of his, Blaine put pen to paper and started to write, not letting himself second guess a single word of what he was saying.

*

When Cooper came home from that first evening's filming Blaine couldn't even wait five seconds before accosting him in the hallway.

"Yes, I gave him the letter, OK? Can I take my jacket off now, B?"

"Did he read it? What did he say? What was his reaction? Can I meet him? Did he say anything?"

"He will, nothing, he thanked me, I don't know, nothing much," Cooper answered after taking a second to process everything. "Look, it was the end of the scene, we were getting ready to go and I just handed it over, said my little brother was a fan and wanted me to pass on a letter and that it would mean a lot to you, him, if he read it."

"And?"

"And he said thank you, put it into his bag and left. Look, B, I wish I could tell you that Kurt and I are best buddies and we hang out and that I could totally get you in. But truth is that he keeps himself to himself. He's got this publicist, Mercedes, and trust me you do not want to get on the wrong side of her."

Blaine knew all about the infamous Mercedes Jones. She'd been hired right at the start to protect Kurt from the negative influences Hollywood can have on a sixteen year old as well as make sure that people took him seriously. She was fierce and determined; more than once she'd been mentioned in articles which were about Kurt, purely because she'd made security move the journalists back five or ten feet, or because she'd run into a director at some party and given him hell because he'd refused to even consider that 'new kid Hummel' for his film and now that Kurt was big it was his loss and he'd have to pretty much beg to even get Kurt's attention these days.

Blaine's favourite incident, however, came after Kurt's first award win. _Best Actor_ in the Los Angeles Film Critics Association Awards and the start of something great for Kurt. When he was up there, giving a stumbling and shocked acceptance speech, there'd been a quick shot of Mercedes. She'd been crying with pride and mouthed 'that's my boy' at the camera. She arranged one interview that night, despite everyone wanting to talk to the kid that had come from nowhere, and when E! complained she had written an open letter to the industry, telling them in no uncertain terms how they used to treat gay kids and black kids and now they had teamed up they were working to their rules so get used to it.

Where Kurt went Mercedes went and people were slowly working out that it was just easier to go along with it. They'd never made any demands that were unreasonable (pretty much the opposite actually) and under her guidance Kurt's career had gone international within two years.

"So he's what? Reclusive?" Blaine asked, feeling his stomach sink with his hope.

"...Private?" Cooper settled on. "Between takes he's happy to make small talk and we'll grab a bite to eat from the craft services sometimes but when we're done? He's gone. He won't come out with the crew, I don't think he's accepted anyone's invitations for dinner or drinks—"

"He's underage, Coop."

"—and from what I'm hearing, this is him. He's polite and he's great to work with, but we're never going to be best buddies. Or brothers-in-law."

"Shut up," Blaine scowled, pushing his way out of Cooper's attempt at a hair ruffle. "I'm not asking for his cell number or anything. I just... want to meet him someday."

"I don't think that day is coming any time soon, sorry," Cooper said and it sounded like he honestly meant it.

Later that night, after picking at his dinner and feigning a headache, Blaine sat on the ledge by his window and stared out. "I just wish I could talk to him," he said quietly, his breath misting the glass a little. "Thirty seconds. I'd be happy with that."


	2. Chapter 2

It was a long, long week. More than once he offered to pick Cooper up from filming, just hoping for a chance to run into Kurt but every time he'd either just gone or he was waiting until everyone had. When they took over the auditorium for a scene he half-joked New Directions should storm it in protest – didn't they know they had a Regionals win to prepare for?

Any thoughts about trying to sneak past security by claiming to be an extra failed when a senior tried it, quickly reporting back to his fellow students that all cast and crew had been given some kind of swipe card entry pass which brought up a photo ID (so stealing one was out of the question). No card, no access, no chance.

By the Thursday evening Blaine had started to resign himself to the truth – he was never going to meet Kurt. He'd had plenty of time to read the letter (and Blaine had had plenty of time to deconstruct what he'd written, finding new ways each time about how he'd come across as immature or stupid or obsessive) and still nothing.

He pulled up outside the school just before seven and waited for Cooper as always, staring at the security guard by the doorway as if he could somehow will him out of existence.

Just after seven it opened and Cooper appeared, but he made no move to walk across to the car. Instead he waved and then made a beckoning gesture to his little brother. Too tired to even care, Blaine got out of the car and walked over.

"What?" Blaine asked. "You not done yet?"

"One quick scene to do, we're running a bit late. Wanna come watch?"

"You mean it?" Blaine asked.

"If you want."

Blaine glanced at the security guard who gave a small nod. 

"Cleared it earlier, thought it'd be a nice surprise. Come on, kid," Cooper said, grabbing Blaine's hand and pulling him inside. "It's tiny really, I'm more in the background but I gotta be on set. Continuity you see, it's really important."

Blaine was only half listening, trying to take in as much of his surroundings as possible. The crew, the lights, the camera, the sheer number of people milling about.

"Blaine?" Cooper said, bringing him back to reality. "You OK?"

"Yeah... Thanks for this," Blaine managed to say. "I know you tried..."

He stopped when he heard a new voice, clear but not too loud, cutting across the background noise.

"When do you think I'll be able to complain about my character's wardrobes? I swear they get worse with each film."

Blaine's blood seemed to still in his veins as he turned to face the direction of that voice.

"It's fancy dress, Kurt," a woman was saying, "it's supposed to be... out there. The costume is important to the script."

"I need to have a chat with the writers about how me in this dress is important to the script," Kurt quipped. "Out there indeed."

The only thing out there for Blaine at that moment was his heart rate. A voice was screaming in the back of his head but the rest of him was inexplicably calm.

"You wanted a chance," Cooper said quietly, "this is it."

"I..." Blaine started but then thought and words failed him.

"Do I have to do everything?" Cooper laughed. "Hey Kurt, looking fine as always!"

"Shut up," Blaine growled, suddenly terrified that Kurt would turn around and see Cooper and then see him and then his heart might actually stop.

"I'd like to see you look this good in sequins and high heels," Kurt bit back playfully. "You're just jealous that you don't have my legs."

"Sure, that's it," Cooper laughed.

"You must be Blaine," Kurt said, turning his attention to him and causing a further silent meltdown.

"I'm sure if he could speak he'd say hi," Cooper said, shoving Blaine with his shoulder.

"It's fine," Kurt laughed softly (and oh god Blaine was going to die and he didn't care).

"Hi," Blaine finally managed to say.

"We're ready for you guys," someone said and then no, god please no, Kurt was moving away from him, slightly unsteady on his heels

"Well done, kid," Cooper said as he too moved away and Blaine couldn't tell if his brother was being sarcastic or not.

He didn't wait to find out. While the scene was being set up he walked back to the exit and waited for Cooper in the car. To his brother's credit they didn't talk about it at all on the ride home; Blaine didn't need anyone to point out how badly he'd screwed up. He'd wanted thirty seconds, he got them.

 

*

 

Friday dragged the same as the rest of the week had done and all Blaine wanted to do was go home, crawl into bed and wake up when the filming was all over. Rachel was confused as to why he'd suddenly lost interest in Kurt and the movie but she was soon distracted by Mike who was making yet another pitch for a dance solo. Blaine sent his friend a silent "thank you" which was met with a knowing nod and a discussion with Rachel that seemed to last for hours.

Blaine Anderson might be a total failure when it came to meeting his idols but when it came to his friends he'd done pretty good.

When the final bell rang he didn't bother racing out of the door like everyone else, but headed for his locker to grab his English book. Maybe he could drown his weekend in additional work and try to forget what a fool he'd made of himself. As he walked up to his locker he noticed an envelope taped to it. Whoever put it there must have done it after the bell because normally stuff like that didn't stay up on lockers that long.

Pulling it down he turned it over, still finding no clue as to what it was or who it was from. He untucked the flap and peered inside.

A small white swipe card was inside and Blaine's breath hitched a little as he pulled it out. The only thing on the card was a time – 9pm – written by a sharpie on the plastic. He turned it over but there were no other clues as to who it was from. The hallway was empty and there was no sound indicating anyone was left nearby.

English book forgotten, Blaine pocketed the card and envelope, turned and walked away. His fingers clutched to it all the way home as if it would somehow disappear if he let it out of his sight while his mind raced with every possibility.

At 8:55 he was outside the school again, looking at the (different) security guard by the door. The handwriting wasn't Cooper's but that didn't mean he couldn't have arranged it. And who else would have known which was his locker?

Deciding that he had the best brother ever, Blaine slipped out of the car at 8:58 and walked up to the guard, trying to look and act as if he had every right to be there. With a shaking hand he held out the card to him and was suddenly hit with a wave of panic. He'd assumed that it was a swipe card for the set but what if it wasn't? What if it was for something else and he was about to make a fool of himself?

Worse still, what if it wasn't from Cooper? What if someone had stolen the card and the picture now coming up on the guard's handset was someone else. Maybe some woman or someone so obviously not him (oh god, what if someone had stolen _Kurt's_ card and given it to Blaine as a joke – or a gift – and wanted to meet him by his locker at 9pm?) that by the time the card beeped as it registered Blaine had convinced himself he was about to be tackled to the ground and arrested.

"Anderson, huh?" the guard said. (Oh god it was Cooper's card they stole. Maybe they just wanted Blaine to return it.) "Coop's little brother?"

"...Yeah," Blaine said quietly. "I was given the card, it says 9pm on it—"

"A few minutes early isn't a bad thing, kid," the guard said, stepping aside and grabbing the handle. "Sure you know this school better than me. They're in the astronomy room."

Blaine was halfway through the door before the hand clamped down on his shoulder and he'd decided that the Universe just had it in for him. He turned, preparing himself to be thrown out, but instead the card was returned to him with a smile.

If this was a joke, Blaine decided when the door was shut behind him, it was the most elaborate one yet.

With every step Blaine was waiting for someone to grab him, to be told that he wasn't supposed to be here and that he will have to leave, but no one appeared. 

"Blaine, right?" he was greeted at the astronomy room. "I'm Mercedes," the woman introduced, holding out her hand, "and by your reaction I'm sure that your brother has told you about me?"

"A few things, yeah," Blaine laughed. "I'm sure it's all lies."

"Not a word of it," Mercedes grinned. "Well, not much anyway. Don't look so scared, I try to save the game face for the press. They expect me to be fierce now so I have to play the part. But really, you do right by me and Kurt I'm fine by you. Come on, they're waiting."

Blaine fell into step beside Mercedes as she headed out into the corridor. "I'm sorry but I'm a bit confused. I got a card and I don't know who sent it or why or—"

"Hi," Kurt said.

Blaine stopped in his tracks – this was the one thing that never occurred to him.

"I'll give you a minute to work out what you're going to say back," Kurt said gently.

"You can't hold yesterday against me," Blaine replied, "I was distracted."

"By what?"

"By the sequins," Blaine said without thinking. "You can't expect a guy to hold calm and rational and kind thoughts when you're faced with that."

"So you thought it looked stupid too?"

"I..." Blaine sighed. He was in this deep. "Not your best outfit."

"Very tactful," Kurt smiled.

"Did nothing for your waist and you suit brighter colours," Blaine said, trying desperately to get his mouth to stop talking before Mercedes realised he wasn't 'doing right' by Kurt and he got offended and arranged a restraining order.

Instead Kurt just laughed. "At least my legs looked good in the heels. Although I'm trying not to ask where they got those in my size in _Ohio_."

Blaine felt a sudden rush of relief through his body and while the nerves were still there they were no longer crippling. "Can I ask you something?" he ventured. "Why did you send me that card?"

"Because I wanted to spend more than thirty seconds with you and get beyond the initial 'hi', Kurt said, his mouth curling up into a smile which made Blaine want to preserve this moment forever. "And because I wanted to thank you for your letter."

"...Y-y-you read it?"

"Of course I did. Several times. It's... Really? Everything you said?"

"Yeah," Blaine said quietly.

"I'm... I'm so sorry," Kurt whispered, reaching out and putting his hand on Blaine's arm.

"Things are better now. Better here if you can believe it."

"Really? After what happened to me I couldn't wait to get out of public school."

"I wish it were an option," Blaine said. "Well, I did. Coming here was hard but once I settled in, joined the glee club... I was scared about coming out again but Rachel and Mike—"

"They're the ones you talked about?"

"—yeah, they made it... less scary somehow. They didn't care if I was gay, straight, whatever. All Rachel really cares about is whether or not I can match her vocally!"

"What?"

"Glee club. She and I are the club leads, we've got Regionals in a few weeks."

"You must be excited. I remember I was."

"You were in your glee club?"

"Yeah," Kurt smiled. "We were pretty good actually, even won once."

"Regionals?"

"Nationals," Kurt smiled.

"When?" Blaine asked. "Last year was a club from Texas and the year before that it was the Warblers; they're from Westerville, here in Ohio. I think the year before that was a group from Wisconsin and you're not that much older than me—"

"You think you've got a chance?" Kurt asked quickly.

"Maybe. Rachel's really good—"

"So are you," Kurt said. "Cooper showed me a video."

"He did?"

"He's really proud of you. Never shuts up about his little brother. Apparently you're going to be bigger than both of us?"

"Oh god," Blaine moaned. "It's all lies, I swear."

"It was all good, don't worry," Kurt laughed.

"In which case it _was_ all lies," Blaine laughed in response.

"Even the bit about the locker shrine? Because I quite liked that," Kurt smiled. "Maybe I should have tried to open it and have a look."

Blaine had suddenly paled as he imagined Cooper going on and on about how much Blaine liked – no, loved Kurt – about the locker shrine and the magazine collection that wasn't even close to the kind of magazine collection most boys his age had. About the blogs and the message boards and the pictures and everything and suddenly all he could see were the two of them laughing about it, laughing about him and everything became white noise around him.

"Are you OK?" Kurt asked, bringing Blaine back to himself.

"I... yeah, just... What exactly did Coop tell you?"

"Nothing bad, I promise," Kurt said, sensing Blaine's concern.

"What counts as 'nothing bad'?"

"Just... stuff. I don't know. Glee and your singing and how proud he is, the fact you're a fan—"

"Oh god," Blaine moaned, trying to hide behind his hands like it would make it all just go away.

" _That's_ what you're worried about? Blaine, it's fine. I meet fans all the time."

"That's not true," Blaine said into his palms.

"OK, so not all the time. But a picture in your locker and an interview collection is nothing, trust me."

"I should go," Blaine said, pulling his hands away. "I should go before I embarrass myself any further."

"You're not embarrassing yourself, I promise," Kurt tried to soothe him. "I won't force you to stay if you don't want to. There's a couple of scenes left to shoot and I thought you could watch, we could chat some more—"

"Why?" Blaine asked.

"What?"

"Why me? Thousands of people would kill – probably literally – to be where I am right now. Kids whose lives you're affecting—"

"According to your letter you're one of them," Kurt said.

"—and you choose me. The little brother of your co-star. Is this about appearances or something? Keeping Cooper happy for a happy workplace?"

"Blaine, I learned early on that silly YouTube videos will keep your brother happy."

Blaine couldn't help but laugh at that but he felt the tension knot in his chest all the same.

"I asked you to come here because after reading your letter I wanted to... needed to speak to you I guess."

"But why? My story's hardly unique. Every other post online has a variation on it and there are dozens who have it so much worse, even here in Ohio. You could have reached out to any of them."

"I'm not box ticking if that's what you think," Kurt said, his voice taking on a sharper tone. "This isn't _Kurt Hummel's Good Deed_ you know? I get those letters, every single one and if I could then I'd meet every single one of them too. But I can't, even practicalities aside. But you? You I can. You're my co-star's brother, you want to get into this life... It was easy to swing."

"Easy to swing," Blaine muttered. "Right."

"Don't take it like that, please."

"I'm still trying to figure out why someone like you would even spend five minutes with—"

"Don't you dare finish that sentence," Kurt warned. "I'm not like that. I promise you there was no hidden motive in this."

"Really?" Blaine asked, trying to replace the knot in his chest with hope.

"Really," Kurt said, putting his hand back on Blaine's arm. "And honestly? I don't know why you. Maybe it was because I could, maybe it was because... you're me in a way."

Blaine scoffed slightly at that. "Since when was I in your league?"

"What league?"

"Guys like me and guys like... well, you."

"What about it?" Kurt asked. "Coop said you're a Junior, right? We're about the same age, same interests, same background—"

"I must have missed the interview where you were—"

"Beaten up?" Kurt finished. "Not every aspect of my life is in the press, Blaine." Kurt caught Blaine's look and shook his head gently. "I wasn't, my dad pulled me out before it got that far. One too many threats of it though."

"I never even got those," Blaine said quietly. "It just... happened."

"I'm so sorry."

"It wasn't your fault. And trust me, you are making things better."

"Then I'm glad," Kurt smiled and the knot in Blaine's chest loosened a little. "Please stay?"

"I..."

"Please?"

Blaine had a pretty good imagination. He'd thought about this, fantasised even about what he would do if he ever got the chance to meet Kurt, spend more than thirty seconds with him. He'd always been realistic about the setting; an event of some kind with hundreds if not thousands of others like him. Where he was a face in the crowd, one of many. But this? This was quiet, almost... intimate? Just them on a film set late one Friday night.

"Yes. OK," he said eventually. "Just... warn me if I'm about to make a fool of myself, OK?"

"Is that a real possibility?" Kurt laughed.

 

*

 

Blaine's phone had been buzzing with 'get well soon!' texts but guilt had prevented him from reading them. Rachel had alternated between wishing him a speedy recovery and _demanding_ a speedy recovery because Regionals was in just over a week and there wasn't enough time to train up a suitable replacement if his throat wasn't better soon.

He knew that wouldn't be a problem for one reason.

There wasn't anything wrong with his throat.

It was stupid, the chances of running into Kurt at the school were non-existent given they weren't due to be filming there but the only place he knew he'd be safe from anyone who had anything to do with that stupid film would be if he hid away in his room. Which he'd done since late Friday night when he'd come home – even Cooper had avoided him, not wanting to get sick and hold up production.

Blaine was more than happy with that.

He caught up on the books he meant to read, watched movies he'd not seen in ages and soon he found himself updating his iTunes library. There were a couple of emails in his inbox, two from Rachel: one outlining a herbal remedy she and her dads had always found useful for bad throats; one with a revised rehearsal schedule, taking into account a slow return to full health.

Once he'd cleared those a new one dropped in from someone he didn't recognise. At first he thought it could be spam but that would be some pretty intuitive spam to say "Get Well Soon" as a subject line so he clicked on the mail from 'Elias Hamilton'.

 

_Hey Blaine!_

_Your brother gave me your email address – I did ask for your cell but he said you're resting your voice so I guess this is better?_

_I hope you're better in time for Regionals. From what I hear around the school you're more than 'good', Blaine. I know you said in your letter that you were hoping to get into NYADA but you didn't think you were good enough – trust me. You are._

_Anyway, I just wanted to say that. Get well soon._

_Oh, and please don't share this address with anyone. I know you won't but Mercedes makes me ask everyone I email from this account. It's nice to have one address that's private, just mine. But if you wanted to drop me a line – at anytime – then I honestly don't mind. I really enjoyed Friday and while I can't promise we'll get to do it again I would like to stay in touch._

_Kurt_

_PS – because I know you'll ask! My mother's name was Elizabeth Hamilton. Elias is a male version of Elizabeth. My way of remembering where my roots are I guess._

 

Before he could talk himself out of it, Blaine hit reply. If he was lucky he could catch Kurt before he returned to work.

 

_Kurt,_

_Thank you for the wishes but I'm afraid they were offered under false pretences. I won't share your email address if you promise not to tell anyone that I'm not actually sick._

_Blaine_

 

He'd written and deleted a paragraph about Friday so many times that he decided that he'd like to go back to forgetting about it.

 

_Blaine,_

_Pulling a sickie? That is naughty of you! I promise your secret is safe but I need details. Did Rachel Berry finally get to you? Is the pressure of an expected win making you crack? Are you unable to return to the normality of life after I introduced you to the amazing world of movie production?_

_Kurt_

_Kurt,_

_After Friday night I just wanted to hide._

_Blaine_

_Now I wish I had made your brother give me your cell number because then I could actually tell you this._

_You have NOTHING to be embarrassed about. I'm the one who should be sorry – there was no reason for him to speak to you that way. I don't care that you're a fan (and by that I mean that it doesn't bother me) and I don't care that you're online blogging about me. I care that you didn't say a word about Friday to anyone._

_I may have Googled on Saturday, just to be sure._

_If it weren't for people like you then I'd not have a job and I have never lost sight of that, even if some idiots on our set have. So please, PLEASE don't feel bad about it. Mercedes may have even offered to see about getting him fired if that makes you feel any better? But the short version is this – you are not now, and in my eyes you have never been, some "crazy fan with nothing better to do"._

_You shouldn't feel like you need to hide who you are and what you're into. I keep telling my fans that who they are is something to be celebrated and that goes for you too. Next time you come on set it will be different, I promise._

_That's if you want a next time. I'd understand if you don't but I'd still like to stay in touch, even after the movie's wrapped._

_Kurt_

 

Blaine read the email a couple of times, wondering what to make of that. He'd felt so small and so silly on Friday; being mocked by some bit-part co-star for being a fan, for following Kurt's career and now the man himself like (and this had been his favourite description) like a lovesick teenager.

Because he was. Because it was stupid and silly and he knew that logically they weren't even proper friends, but he _really_ liked Kurt. If they'd been boys somewhere else, some place where Kurt's name wasn't known across the country and Blaine's name wasn't synonymous with freak, then maybe Blaine would ask him out.

Or maybe he'd be just as nervous and just as sure that he wasn't meant for guys like Kurt. Anyway, if he weren't famous and private and protective of everything to do with his personal life then Kurt would have a boyfriend already. Someone tall and muscular and tanned and everything Blaine wasn't.

But it didn't stop him wanting.

He wanted to spend time with Kurt, he wanted to talk with him some more and he wanted to tell Kurt every last secret and wish and desire that he had ever had and know that he'd found someone who would not only listen but keep his secrets. And god help him he wanted Kurt. Wanted him in the way that he'd wanted, dreamed about, fantasised about for months – years?

It was just a fantasy, he reminded himself, just a dream. Because guys like him didn't get guys like Kurt for boyfriends.

But maybe friends?

For half an hour on Friday, before that... idiot had waded in with his comments and his remarks and his skill at making Blaine feel about three inches tall (something he was never telling Cooper because he had just stopped with the short jokes). The idea that Kurt was on his side made him feel better, made him feel less like the crazed fan everyone seemed to think he was, and allowed him to... hope.

 

_Kurt,_

_Thank you. It means a lot to hear that – and from you._

_And I'd love to stay in touch. Who knows? Maybe we could catch up again before you wrap? I'm free far too much for someone my age, with the exception of the weekend after Regionals when I have tickets for the "Spring Fling Thing" (yes I swear that's what they're calling it) at Legend Valley._

After a moment's thought he typed out his cell number onto the bottom of the email (to save you having to bother Coop and get the third degree! ) and hit send before he could change his mind.

Within minutes his phone buzzed with a text from an unknown contact, just a simple smiley face but it was enough to make Blaine grin for the rest of the night.

 

*

 

Regionals came and went with a resounding victory for the New Directions. Rachel attributed Blaine's recovery to her rigorous rehearsal regime and supplemental diet nursing him back to health. Blaine knew most of the credit lay with "Elias" and their frequent message exchange.

"Someone special?" Rachel asked, moving into the seat beside Blaine on the bus ride back. "You've been texting all day, I bet you'd have tried to take it on stage with you if I'd not taken it off you."

"It's... a friend," Blaine said.

"A _boy_ friend?" Rachel teased, peering over his shoulder. "Elias? Bit old fashioned. From your old school?"

"It's nothing like that before you start," Blaine warned, dodging the question and the lie he'd have to tell.

"Look, I just want you to be happy. And if this... Elias guy makes you happy then I'm happy for you. For you both."

"I'm happy you're happy," Blaine laughed. "And I am happy."

"Good. Because we need to celebrate tonight!"

"All I want to do is sleep, Rach."

"You can sleep between now and the festival," she pointed out. "Tonight the New Directions are celebrating!" she cheered, prompting the bus to join her.

Blaine knew he was never going to get out of this and so he resigned himself to a night in the Berry household. Besides, how bad could it be?

 

*

 

If you'd asked Tina that twenty-four hours later she'd have had plenty to tell you.

 

*

 

"How bad is it?" Kurt asked.

"Bad enough," Blaine replied. "Thankfully her ankle's not broken but she's got to stay off it for a while."

"I'm confused. When you called you said you had good news and then you tell me about Tina and unless you're harbouring some serious negative thoughts towards her I fail to see how this is good news."

"It's good news because now I have an extra ticket for the festival this weekend. And I've already checked Coop's schedule, I know you're not filming."

"And you want me to come?" Kurt asked.

"If you want. You seemed interested when I mentioned it but if you don't want—"

"No, I want," Kurt said quickly, "it's just... not that easy."

"You worried about being recognised?"

"Partly," he admitted, "but I have a strategy for that."

"Worried about Mercedes then?"

"For the most part," Kurt laughed. "The only way to get away from her would be to just leave everything behind and I can't leave my cell. There are people who... I need to be contactable."

"Give them my number," Blaine heard himself say. "If you want that is. If that's all that's stopping you and you're worried—"

"You mean that?" Kurt asked.

"I wouldn't have asked if I didn't."

"And the friends you're going with, Rachel and...?"

"Mike."

"They... OK?" Kurt asked, the unspoken question hanging across the open line.

"Absolutely. You can trust them. I promise you, Kurt, all this is... it's an invitation to come to the music festival, that's all. I'm not trying to gain anything from this, except..."

"Except what?" Kurt prompted when Blaine trailed off.

"Time with you? If you still wanted to... I mean, you said that... and I thought that you'd appreciate the escape and you said in one of your emails that you used to go to festivals all the time before it all kicked off and I thought that—"

"Blaine!" Kurt laughed, cutting into his speech. "I would love to come."

"Really?"

"Really. If you say they can be trusted then I trust you. And using your number would be great, thank you. I'll text you with some details later?"

"Shouldn't I be saying that to you?" Blaine asked.

"You'll understand," Kurt said and Blaine could swear he heard a smile on the other end. "Do I need anything?"

"Yourself. And maybe a tent. We have a pitch that will do three without too much hassle. I was taking mine but I can share with Mike now Tina's not coming."

"You sure?"

"Of course."

"Can I ask a favour then?"

"Anything."

"Can I borrow your tent? Only I left mine in New York and I think trying to get one this week might raise a few eyebrows?"

"Fine," Blaine said, then he had to laugh. "You actually have a tent?"

"Maybe," Kurt laughed. "Something else for you to find out about me later?"

"I look forward to it then," Blaine said.

"They're calling for me, I need to go."

"OK, well enjoy the shoot."

"I will do," Kurt said and again Blaine could hear that smile. "I get to throw a drink over your brother in this scene."

"Oh what I'd give to be there!"

"And rob you of the opportunity to see it first on the big screen? No chance. Besides, it'll look better in the finished product."

"But it won't be as gratifying," Blaine said.

"Probably not. OK, I really have to go."

"Go, attack my brother with my blessing."

"Thank you," Kurt said, sounding choked up in a melodramatic way. "That means so much."

"Hanging up now," Blaine said before doing just that. He lay back on his bed and rested his phone thoughtfully against his mouth. He wasn't sure what this thing was between them but he was interested to see where it went. And this weekend would certainly do just that.


	3. Chapter 3

Blaine waited until after school the next day to tell Mike and Rachel that he'd found someone to take Tina's ticket. He said that it was a friend they didn't know (technically not a lie), that he would meet them somewhere en route (not a lie) and that they'd get on fine (he hoped). Rachel took one look at Blaine's smile and asked if the mysterious Elias would be the one joining them.

Blaine's smile gave it away and so he spent the rest of the week trying to avoid awkward questions and assumptions. Every time Rachel so much as hinted at the mysterious Elias being a boyfriend (or a potential one at the very least) Blaine had to bite his tongue.

Truth was he didn't know what he and Kurt were. They exchanged messages, talked whenever they could, but did that make them friends? Did that give them the potential to be more? The more time he spent talking to Kurt, the more he felt at ease with him in a way that he'd never had before. It wasn't at all like he expected it to be – so many people online who'd met him talked about him being polite but reserved (which they understood his motivation for being so) and yet after their initial meeting Blaine had found none of that.

Kurt's opinions and feelings flowed as quickly as their conversations and there was so much _passion_ in him for things that Blaine had never even considered were on his radar. They swapped long emails during one of his nights shoots about how Kurt had gone from scraping together every last penny he could to buy last season's designer wear to being given them for free, all in return for name dropping at events. He had a closet that his fifteen-year old self would have probably killed for.

The exchange continued until almost four in the morning and even though Blaine almost fell asleep during his Algebra class it was worth it. It was always worth it.

Kurt was a secret that Blaine got to keep close to his heart, something that he knew that no one else did. The forums were pouring over photos taken from a distance, pictures both Kurt and Cooper uploaded to Twitter, and so much speculation that it was almost impossible to resist correcting their most basic misconceptions.

For one, Cooper was _not_ the gay Anderson brother. That was the subject of many amused emails and texts, as well as Blaine enjoying having something to wind Cooper up with.

As the days rolled away to the weekend Blaine found his nerves even more on edge. Every time he got a new message or email he was convinced that Kurt would cancel on him, that something would come up and they would have to work the weekend. But Cooper continued to come home each night with reports about how well they were doing, how they were on schedule and how much he was looking forward to a weekend off.

Blaine was worried that Cooper was about to insist on some brotherly bonding time but suddenly there was an old high school girlfriend on the scene and he had his own plans which Blaine never, ever, _ever_ wanted to hear the explicit details of.

Not again.

*

"It should be somewhere along here," Blaine said, looking up from the map.

"I don't understand why he couldn't just meet us in Lima," Rachel said pointedly. "This is an unnecessary detour."

"He has his reasons," Blaine said, closing the map book and shifting on the back seat so he had a better view. "I need to ask you guys a really big favour."

"Bigger than making us take a fifteen-mile detour?" Rachel asked.

"Mike's the one driving and you don't hear him complaining," Blaine pointed out. "Please, Rach. This is important. I need you two to promise me that... that what happens on this weekend stays on this weekend."

"Are you planning something?" Rachel asked, the sound of delicious scandal in her voice. "Looking for a _traditional_ festival experience?"

"What? No! Rachel, just... no."

"What's going on?" Mike asked, keeping his eyes on the road. "This to do with your friend?"

"Yeah," Blaine said. "You can't tell anyone he's coming."

"If he's sneaking out then I'm not getting into trouble," Mike warned, "that's a bit too far."

"Well, it's not exactly sneaking out but... please. I promise you that there will be no angry parents or accusations of kidnapping. It's just... he doesn't want people to know."

"Told his friends he's busy?" Mike asked.

"Something like that," Blaine said to himself, smiling as he saw the car pulled up by the side of the road. "There," he pointed.

"This is like something out of a spy movie," Mike muttered as he pulled up behind it.

"Promise me, guys," Blaine said, his voice a little desperate now.

"OK, fine, yeah, I promise," Mike said.

"I do too," Rachel said eventually. "I swear it on my limited edition Barbara Streisand signed CD that whoever your Elias friend is it will be like he wasn't here."

"Thank you," Blaine said before getting out of the car. He walked over to the other car and was greeted by the driver who looked around him before nodding once, almost imperceptibly. "I'm Blaine," he greeted, unsure if he needed to do something.

"Ignore him," Kurt said as he climbed out of the passenger side. "He's... protective."

"I should come with you," the driver said.

"Because that won't draw any attention to me, having you follow me around everywhere," Kurt drawled.

It was only when he walked around the car to join Blaine that he finally took in how _different_ he looked. The fitted designer gear that he was used to seeing Kurt in had been replaced with a pair of pre-distressed jeans; the snug shirts with a tee that once had a printed design on the front but had been worn and washed so many times that Blaine knew he would have to look at it for a while to work out what it had been and staring at Kurt's chest was a Very Dangerous Idea indeed. Thankfully he soon pulled on a jacket and removed temptation from sight. The hair, while still amazing, looked more like he'd just climbed out of bed rather than had it styled and then Blaine was trying very hard not to think about Kurt and beds.

"I'll be fine. You have Blaine's cell number, I have yours. Anyone asks and I'm just someone who looks a bit like that guy filming a movie down the road."

"I still don't like it..."

"Well, I'm not paying you to like it. I'm paying you to pick me up from here on Sunday evening and to make sure that Mercedes doesn't find out where I am."

For a second Blaine wondered if Kurt and this driver were about to go toe to toe on it and he tried to work out who would win. This guy was tall and looked like he had muscle on him but Kurt was small and strong himself.

Blaine knew this.

He'd seen the photos of that one, glorious time when Kurt had worn a sleeveless shirt and no he was not going to think about the muscle definition hidden under that jacket. He decided that if Kurt was caught then Tall Guy might have the advantage but it was reliant on Kurt being caught in the first place.

"You sure about this?" Tall Guy asked. "About...?"

"Yes," Kurt sighed, "I'm sure. And this is Blaine, Finn. Blaine, this is my brother, Finn."

"B-brother?" Blaine stammered, trying to work out how these two could possibly be related.

"Step-brother technically," Finn said, "my mom, his dad. But I'm still his big brother."

"By _three months_ ," Kurt sighed.

"Still don't need to pay me."

"Yes I do," Kurt grinned. "That way I have comeback when you go and tell Dad."

"Don't know why," Finn muttered, "he'd probably approve of you doing 'normal stuff'."

"Thanks for the ride," Kurt said, grabbing his bag from the back seat. "See you Sunday?"

"Yeah, sure," Finn said, not taking his eyes off Blaine which made him feel suddenly nervous. "Have fun?"

"Always do," Kurt smiled.

Finn stepped forward, ostensibly to check that the back door was closed but it was enough to make Blaine feel _really_ nervous. " _Anything_ happens to him..."

"It won't," Blaine said quietly. "I won't let it."

"Quarterback," Finn said, gesturing with his thumb to himself. "Pipsqueak," he said, prodding a finger into Blaine's chest.

"Leaving," Kurt said, grabbing Blaine's arm and pulling him away from his very over-protective brother. "Bye!"

Blaine allowed himself to be lead back to Mike's waiting car and he tried to decide where he wanted to look: Finn's attempt at a death glare; Kurt walking beside him; or the stares of his two friends waiting for an explanation as to why Kurt Hummel was joining them. The pair of them climbed into the back seat and pulled their belts on just as Rachel and Mike turned around.

"Blaine said you weren't going to freak out, please don't freak out," Kurt said.

"I'm not freaking out," Rachel said calmly. "I'm just..."

"Curious?" Mike supplied.

"Yes. Curious. That works. Curious as to how and why... this," she said, waving her hand in some all-encompassing gesture at the two men sitting in the back of the car.

"Blaine asked, I said yes, and I assume the whole 'don't tell anyone' request now makes sense?"

"Yeah," Rachel said in a half-whine that suggested she was about ready to give up trying to figure out how her best friend had become friends with his teen crush and she'd not known a thing about it.

"Look, if it's a problem I can call Finn and let you guys get on with your weekend..." Kurt began but he stopped when he felt Blaine's hand on his leg.

"No," Blaine said firmly. "You're coming, end of discussion. I asked if I could invite a friend to take Tina's ticket, this is said friend. It shouldn't matter who he is or what he does, the whole point of this is to get away from that."

"So," Mike said eventually. "Elias?"

"Yeah?" Kurt asked cautiously.

"Good to have you with us. Hope you don't mind but the playlist on these trips is traditionally... cheesy."

"Sounds good to me," Kurt grinned.

"Good," Mike replied, pressing play on the iPod docked in its station. "Half of these songs are Blaine's."

"Are they now?" Kurt asked, turning to look at Blaine with one eyebrow already raised as Katy Perry's voice started to fill the car.

"Don't judge me by my music," Blaine muttered, clearly starting to feel embarrassed.

When Kurt put his hand over the one Blaine still had on his leg, giving the fingers a gentle squeeze, he felt better though.

*

Ever since he was a kid Kurt had known what he wanted and he worked to get it. People suspected that this was a trait born out of the loss of his mother but his father would be quick to correct that assumption. Once Kurt had set his sights on something; from playthings when he was a baby, to the kind of career he wanted as an adult, he would stop at nothing until he got it or until it became clear that it would be impossible to get it.

When he was a toddler and those sights were set on toys and games and, god help Burt, tea sets, they were easy to get. Pocket money would be saved, chores done around the house (even at four years old Kurt knew to bargain tidied away toys or a clean room for something), and everyone was happy.

At high school things weren't so easy to get. Kurt set his sights on a place where he was safe to be who he was and the policies at Dalton were that to the letter. He presented the idea to his father and new step-mother along with financial breakdowns of how they could afford it. When Burt saw that most of the money would come from sacrifices Kurt was willing to make he'd agreed, then spent money he and Carole had put aside for other things instead because he couldn't stand the idea of his son giving up anything for something he wanted so badly.

After a year at Dalton a new opportunity came along, one that would be easy to get but hard to keep. There had been long discussions about what it would mean for Kurt to essentially leave school after his Sophomore year, but Mercedes had promised that Kurt's education would not suffer. It would be slowed down of course but he would get a GED.

There were so many discussions about how to present Kurt, how to make sure that he could be a success in that industry. When Mercedes presented them with information about how people accept and perceive gay kids it made Kurt want to scream. Just because he came from Ohio instead of New York it would be harder? How did that work? Mercedes talked a lot about culture and atmosphere so in the end he'd made a flippant comment about just saying he was from New York and that seemed to be that. What did it matter anyway and Kurt reasoned that this way his family would be out of the spotlight; who would look for a New Yorker's family in Ohio?

He wanted to be a star. He wanted to be on stage but he knew that film would be a good stepping stone to that. If he could make his name in film, if he could show off his acting, dancing and singing talents on the big screen then surely Broadway would notice? Eventually, of course. He knew he'd probably start small and that was more than fine with him.

What he hadn't realised was the costs involved. Not only in terms of what he left behind but what he lost along the way. Mercedes guided him through it and Kurt knew that not only did she have his best interests at heart but that she also knew what she was doing. Friendships – like the ones he had at Dalton – were few and far between and there was almost no chance of having a relationship. There'd been one guy, once, but the second he'd been out in the public eye with Kurt it had crashed spectacularly.

He wanted his family to be protected from the consequences of fame and so while he wasn't sad to be leaving Ohio for New York, he was sad to be leaving behind his family. The only people he loved and he was about to essentially disown them. But his father had been clear on this matter – it was right for him, it kept them out of the spotlight, and it meant that when Kurt came home he would have privacy. They would have privacy. Kurt suspected that his father also wanted him to be able to be a normal teenager from time to time, but that was an argument he was sick of having.

Between films and appearances and doing the right thing Kurt had lost the end of his teenage years. Years he should spend in school, with friends, figuring out relationships and himself and making all the mistakes that teenagers do which he couldn't because the eyes of the world were on him.

Which made Blaine so... _tempting_. Here was someone who was starting to see past the character fashioned by Mercedes and his management team. Who spoke to him like he was a normal teenager and who invited him on things that normal teenagers do. Despite their original meeting, Blaine didn't treat him like he was some kind of celebrity to be worshipped and admired from afar. To treat with utmost reverence and agree with every last word that fell out of his mouth.

Their arguments over trashy TV were testament to that.

This was what eighteen year olds should be doing, Kurt realised. Singing along to a playlist of the most cheesiest, silliest songs he'd ever heard, in a car with three other teens who wanted nothing more from the next few days but some fun and downtime. Who expected nothing from him but good company and his share in the small jobs of the weekend. Rachel had a cooking rota, Mike had already co-opted him into tent duty ("Because Rachel is useless and Boxer Blaine here will hammer the pegs in so much you need to cut the ropes to get the tent down!" – which then led to a squeaked, "You _BOX_?" from Kurt and a grin from Blaine.) and suddenly Kurt felt like he could be just another McKinley High student, another member of this group of friends and he was nothing very special at all.

And in all his years of dreaming about his name on posters and billboards and in lights and on trophies, this was the one thing he found he wanted the most.

*

Any worries about being recognised were dismissed quickly when after a hour of people milling around him Kurt realised that no one was paying him more than the slightest bit of attention. He helped Rachel pitch her tent while Blaine and Mike did theirs, then Blaine showed him the tricks to his own two-man which was to be Kurt's personal space. Mike assured Kurt – although he kept referring to him as Elias with a huge grin like it was a joke only they shared – that he was cool sharing with Blaine and that he needed to stop acting like he was imposing.

Before lunch Kurt found himself in the middle of a crowd, dancing along to a band that he'd never heard of before but he was certainly going to check out afterwards, and when he felt the arm slip around his waist he just leaned up against Blaine's body and let himself enjoy.

*

"So, tell me _Elias_ ," Rachel laughed as she picked her way through the dinner they'd made, "what's it like?"

"What's what like?" Kurt asked.

"Working... where you work?"

"It's... intense," Kurt decided on. "There is rarely a day that's just mine. I go out and there's... _people_. And I know it's part of the job that I do, the life that I have. I get to be a part of so many people's lives and a small trade off for that is that I have so many people in my life."

"And that's worth it?" Blaine asked.

"Most of the time. But when you just want to go out and grab a coffee and it means that I have to spend an hour working on my outfit and my hair because god forbid someone snaps a picture and I look less than perfect."

"I got news for you," Mike said around a mouthful of food. "Blaine's got every picture and perfect is overrated."

"What?" Kurt asked.

"He's exaggerating," Blaine said quickly, looking in horror at his friend – former friend if he kept this up.

"What I mean," Mike said after swallowing, "you look better now. More... human?"

Kurt felt his skin blush and he ducked his head.

"He's right," Rachel said, her drink halfway up so she gestured with the water bottle. "That guy, the one everyone knows? He's... crafted. And I know about crafting. This? Is just you."

"You OK?" Blaine asked, ducking his own head to catch Kurt's eye. "Sorry, they can be a bit much..."

"No, it's fine, really," Kurt said, his voice warm and full of affection. When he lifted his head his eyes were shining just a little too much to be natural but no one said anything. "So, what's on the agenda for tomorrow?"

Mike gave a short laugh and put his bowl down. "Same as last year."

"And that is?"

"Go listen to some good music."

"We just head out and follow our ears," Blaine explained. "No plan, just see where the music takes us. That OK?"

"Sounds great," Kurt said. "Right, I think Rachel's rota had me on clear up duty?"

"I'll show you where the facilities are," Blaine said, getting to his feet and taking Mike's bowl off him before he licked it clean. "Thank you, Rachel, for reminding me why I don't eat vegan as a rule."

"Should do what I do," Mike said over Rachel's feigned indignation, "bring meat."

"What do I have to do to get in on that?" Kurt exclaimed in excitement.

"You lot are a bunch of heathens, you do know that?" Rachel laughed.

"Thank you," Kurt said when he and Blaine were away from the tents.

"For what? Feeding you some vegan stuff that's probably very good for you which means that it's virtually inedible. I have some chocolate in my bag if you want some contraband."

"You could have warned me to bring my own supplies when I asked."

"And deny you the experience Mike and I have had two years prior? Rite of passage, Kurt. Shit, Elias. Sorry."

"It's fine," Kurt assured him. "I'm not sure I'd remember to answer to it even if you did keep it up."

"Says the guy who has played how many characters?"

"That's different. I get into role, I become them. I stop being Kurt."

"And who is Kurt?"

"What?"

"They were right, this... you? Not the you I met at the school. So what...?"

"I don't know," Kurt admitted. He said nothing else as they filled the small camp sink. "Been a long time since I got to be... this."

"That's... a shame. Ironic."

"Ironic?"

"Yeah. For someone who goes on about how it's important to be yourself, to be who you are and not what—"

"Well you don't know anything about my life," Kurt snapped, throwing the bowls into the dishwater so forcefully that a small wave sloshed over the side of the small tub and splashed over Blaine's shoes. "Don't you dare think you have the right to make any kind of comment, do you hear me?"

And with that he turned on his heel and marched back to the tents, leaving Blaine alone with the water which was still lapping against the sides of the bowl.

*

He'd stubbed his toe twice, tripped over the guide rope so violently that he was afraid that he was about to bring the whole tent down, and sworn so loudly that the people on the next site had told him to be quiet. But Mike was still snoring away so he was safe.

Deciding that Tina was a saint for putting up with that Blaine started to dig around in the bag he'd removed from the tent. Mike's keys had to be in there somewhere and at the very least he'd be somewhat warm.

Swearing slightly under his breath when he realised that the keys weren't in this bag he looked up, starting to debate whether or not he could risk sneaking back into the tent and having a proper hunt for them.

Then he yelped.

"Sorry," Kurt whispered, "I heard something – you I guess – and... You OK?"

"Can't sleep," Blaine said, gesturing to the tent where it sounded like a small wind machine was in operation. "I was going to take my sleeping bag and try and sleep in the car."

"Right."

"Sorry if I woke you."

"You didn't," Kurt said. "I... couldn't sleep either."

"Mike that loud?"

"No, I..." Kurt began then ran a hand through his hair. "I'm sorry. About earlier."

"You don't need to—"

"Yes I do," Kurt interrupted. "I overreacted and I shouldn't have. It's just... a touchy subject."

"You were right though," Blaine said, "I don't know anything about your life. I know what's in interviews and magazines and that's not who you really are."

"That's not what most people think."

"That's because they've not spent five minutes with you," Blaine said. "The guys were right earlier. Who you are here? It's... different."

"Good different or bad?" Kurt asked.

"That depends on how you see it. It's your life, Kurt, no one else's."

"And everyone expects me to be... _him_. I need to be him because he's got people looking up to him and he's setting all these examples and precedents and—"

"And _you_ can't?"

"I'm not from New York," Kurt blurted out.

"I know."

"If I was going to be out then they said that it would be better if I came from a more – tolerant background? So I moved to New York and we just said that I was from there, which was technically true by then, but... Wait, you _know_?"

"You said you won Nationals with your Glee club and I told you, there's not been a New York win in years."

"Right."

"Your brother had Ohio plates on his car."

"Right."

"And," Blaine said, taking a deep breath, "the year Dalton won Nationals they had a... gay lead vocalist. Someone who left just after. Right before..."

Kurt just nodded and Blaine felt his knees give a little at the confirmation. Since that comment about Nationals Blaine had started to suspect but he didn't dare imagine that the guy he'd spent years dreaming about used to live an hour's drive away.

"Look, you shouldn't have to sleep in the car, you'll be stiff in the morning," Kurt said.

"I'm not sharing with Rachel," Blaine said with a small half-laugh.

"It's a two man tent," Kurt shrugged, swinging his body a little to gesture back to his tent – Blaine's tent – the one he was in.

"I couldn't..."

"Why not?"

"Kurt..."

"You're the first person I've been able to really talk to outside of work in months," Kurt said quietly. "I'd like it very much if you didn't freeze to death."

Blaine just nodded and collected his sleeping bag, returning Mike's bag to just inside the tent. Kurt had moved over to give him room but as was always the way it was still a bit of a squeeze. He became very aware of every part of his body, trying to make sure he wasn't stepping on Kurt or doing something stupidly inappropriate like shove his ass in his face.

"Thanks," Blaine said once he was laid down, rigidly straight on his back and not daring to even move.

"Why didn't you say anything? Earlier? If you knew?" Kurt asked after a moment and it took Blaine a little while to catch up.

"Because if you wanted to talk about it you'd have brought it up," he said simply. "You must have had your reasons..."

"None of them seem worth it in hindsight," Kurt said, his voice quiet in the darkness. "What helped sell it for me was that it would keep my dad and step-mom out of the spotlight, you know? They would go about their lives and they wouldn't have press on the doorstep every time Carole went for her shift at the hospital or Dad opened up the garage."

"Garage?" Blaine said quietly, then sat up sharply. " _Burt_ Hummel's your dad?"

"You know him?"

"Dad and I take our cars there," Blaine said, his voice tinged with a slight note of exasperation. "I don't believe it. You and I... How many times could we have met before now?"

"We might have done already," Kurt laughed softly, reaching out and putting a hand on Blaine's shoulder to guide him back down. "I used to help Dad out at the garage so if you'd come in with your dad..."

"Do you believe in fate?"

"Maybe," Kurt whispered.

"So tell me about yourself," Blaine said.

"Like what?" Kurt asked. "Nothing much to it. I'm just... me. Mom died when I was a kid for a long time it was just me and Dad. We did fine, got on with things. Then I got partnered with Finn for this science project and he came over to work on it. When his mom came to pick him she met Dad and that was that. They got married and that was it, one big happy family for a while.

"The bullying at school was... It got worse. It wasn't just about the fact that I was clearly... Anything and everything was fair game. When Dad and Carole finally realised what was going on they pulled me out, sent me to Dalton. And for the first time I had friends and I was accepted for me."

"After I was..." Blaine started, his eyes closing involuntarily at the memory of that night, that dance, "we looked at so many schools. Dalton would have been ideal but we just didn't have the money."

"I'm sorry."

"For what? McKinley turned out to be... pretty good in the end. Joined the glee club, made friends. It's not exactly Dalton's protection and safety but it's enough."

"Are you happy there?" Kurt asked.

"Yeah, I am," Blaine said eventually. "Are you?"

"What?"

"Are you happy?"

"I... don't know," Kurt admitted. "My friends are graduating this year, going on to college after a huge road trip. Meanwhile I'm shooting a new movie in New York this summer so I can't even join them. It's taken me two years to get enough credits together to even start the equivalent of my senior year and if I keep getting roles at the rate I have been so far it'll be another two years before I get my GED."

"Are you happy?" Blaine repeated. "Because there's plenty that you should be happy about."

"Like what?"

"Like the fact that you are a symbol of hope for _so many_ people out there," Blaine said, "me included. After I came to McKinley it was still tough; people knew what had happened to me and why. But then there was this actor making waves and being out and not hiding who he was and people got to see, really see, that there's more to someone than their sexuality.

"But you knew all that already. You know the difference you're making to so many people all over the country."

"Doesn't mean I'm happy," Kurt said. "I mean, yes, I'm happy that I get to make a difference and I am _thrilled_ that things are getting better and I get to be involved in that."

"So what do you want?"

"I..."

"You find a magic lamp and you get three wishes, what are they?" Blaine asked. "And you can't do all noble stuff or anything altruistic. It's all for you, three wishes. Go."

"I want to graduate high school," Kurt said quickly. "Properly. Go back, classes, the works."

"OK, next?"

"I... want to find out who I am," he said. "I got pulled out of school, end of my Sophomore year, and I've not had a chance to figure out me because..."

"Because you're busy playing _him_?" Blaine asked.

"Yeah, I guess."

"Two down, one to go."

"I..." Kurt began, and Blaine could hear the beginnings of a smile in his voice again. "I have an idea but that's for me."

"No, you can't do that to me," Blaine protested lightly, turning over onto his side. "Tell me."

"Maybe one day."

"Fine," Blaine sulked.

"What would yours be?"

"What?"

"Your three wishes. What would they be?"

"Actually... already made them," Blaine laughed. "Ages ago."

"On a magic lamp?"

"Yes," Blaine said dryly. "I found a magic lamp and a genie and I'm the real Aladdin."

"Shut up," Kurt laughed, giving Blaine a playful shove across the tent. "So tell me."

"If I tell you then they won't come true."

"Fine, but I want to know."

"If they come true you'll be the first person I tell," Blaine said.

"I'd like that," came Kurt's reply and Blaine could hear that smile again.

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"You and me. This... whatever it is."

"Friendship?"

"Is it?"

There was a moment's pause before Kurt said, "If you want it to be. I'd like that."

"Me too."

"I knew taking this role would turn out to be a good thing," Kurt said, his voice getting heavy with sleep.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. It was a chance to come home, see Dad. I worry about him, he's been... sick. His heart."

"Hence why you needed a cell number?"

"Yeah. He should be fine, Carole's great at keeping him in line. I just worry."

"Only natural," Blaine said, his own body slipping into restfulness.

The silence in the tent was natural and comfortable, and soon Blaine was fast asleep, a deep and contented one which was his excuse for how he ended up where he ended up. When he became aware of light he screwed his eyes up some more, trying to bury himself deeper into the pillow and his sleeping bag. As he turned he became aware of two things.

One : he wasn't alone in the tent.

Two : he was pretty much on top of the other person.

Kurt.

Shit.

His eyes snapped open and confirmed that Kurt was already awake, looking over at him with an unreadable expression.

"Morning," Kurt said as Blaine's body shot back so quickly and so far he pushed up against the canvas of the tent.

"God, I am so sorry," Blaine said, "I was asleep and—"

"Blaine, it's fine," Kurt laughed. "To be honest it wasn't a bad way to wake up."

"What?"

"Who doesn't like morning snuggles?" Kurt teased. "And don't worry, there was nothing to be... embarrassed about."

"Really?"

"Really," Kurt soothed. "Now will you please come off the tent before you bring it down on top of us?"

Blaine shuffled forward a bit but was still conscious of not touching Kurt with any part of his body because right now his traitorous mind was supplying him with memories of sensations of being next to Kurt, draping across his body, a leg half hooked over his. All too quickly those images shifted to other dreams, of waking up next to Kurt morning after morning in their bed. The sheets were dark and crisp but ruffled with the sleep of two bodies, the covers warm around them as fingers and hands found warmer skin under them. Ideas of kisses and touches and—

"I think Mike's up," Kurt said, cutting into Blaine's little fantasy trip. "And I'm sure I heard Rachel singing."

"Crap, I was going to go before they got up," Blaine said, "avoid awkward explanations."

"What's awkward?" Kurt asked. "Mike snored, you couldn't sleep, I found you trying to break into the car—"

"I was not!" Blaine protested.

"You were about two minutes away from it, I could tell. You had a crazed look in your eye and a crowbar and—"

"Where the hell did I get a crowbar from?"

"From the site of the murders of the last group of kids to come to this festival," Kurt replied deadpan. "Anyway, after I convinced you not to attack me we shared a tent, only for me to wake up with you attacking me in a whole other way..."

"Oh god," Blaine moaned, covering his face with his hands in embarrassment. "Kurt, I'm so sorry..."

"Don't be," Kurt laughed, reaching out and pulling Blaine's hands from his face. "I, um... I may have woken up kinda wrapped around you too," he admitted. "You give very good sleep cuddles."

"I wouldn't know," Blaine muttered quietly to himself.

"I think me moving is what woke you. You were pretty happy and settled until I did."

"How long were you awake?" Blaine asked.

Kurt bit his lip, catching Blaine's gaze. For a moment the air in the tent hung perfectly still until—

"Are you guys getting up or do we need to leave you alone a bit longer?"

Rachel's voice cut perfectly through the mood and Kurt looked away.

"Alright," Blaine said, shuffling forward and pulling down the zip at the entrance. "Morning."

"Morning to you too," Rachel grinned, peering in at Kurt. "Sleep well?"

"I did after escaping the human generator over there," Blaine said, waving an arm over at Mike. "You're lucky I didn't suffocate you!"

"Sorry," Mike shrugged. "I must be coming down with something, only happens when my sinuses flare up."

"Come on," Rachel said, ignoring them both and grabbing Blaine's wrist. "First stage opens in an hour and we're too small to be at the back. Dressed, fed, ready to go in thirty."

"Sir, yes, sir," Kurt said with a mock salute.

"She means it," Blaine sighed. "Thanks for rescuing me last night."

"Any time," Kurt smiled, putting a hand on Blaine's arm to steady him as he pulled himself up onto his knees while still in his sleeping bag. As Kurt got out almost the full length of his body pushed alongside Blaine's and he had to bite his tongue to prevent any sounds from escaping his mouth.

Today was going to be a long day and tonight? Was going to be torture.


	4. Chapter 4

He tried, he honestly did. There were thousands of people moving and dancing and jumping about the place and so it would be easy to keep some kind of distance between them. There was no need, none whatsoever, for them to be any closer than personal space would allow. That was Blaine's plan and he had every intention of sticking to it.

Seemed the festival had other ideas.

Every person in the crowd seemed more intent in not pushing them apart but closer together. Every move, dance and jump seemed to knock them into one another; arms, hips, shoulders, and on one memorable occasion, a hand on an ass.

Accidentally of course.

"What's going on with you two?" Rachel asked when they were on a drinks run, away from the crowds and the noise.

"What?"

"You and Kurt."

"We're... friends."

"Sure you are," she mocked.

"We are!"

"You and Mike are friends and I don't remember seeing you grabbing his ass in the year you've known each other."

"Shut up," Blaine growled. "Four waters," he ordered as they got to the front of the line. "We are friends. End of."

"But you want it to be more?" Rachel asked.

Blaine ignored her, handing over the money and grabbing two of the bottles. He didn't wait, just left her to pick up the remaining ones and walked off.

"Blaine!" she called after him, grabbing the drinks only as an afterthought. "I just don't want you to get hurt, that's all," she said when she caught up with him.

"Who says I'm going to get hurt?"

"You're falling in love with a Hollywood actor," she pointed out, "what about this will end well?"

"I'm not—"

"I'm not blind," Rachel cut across him. "I don't know what happened last night—"

"Nothing happened," Blaine snapped, stopping in his tracks. "Let's be really clear about this. Mike snored so loudly I couldn't sleep. I was going to sleep in the car but I couldn't find the keys, Kurt just saved me from sleeping outside, that's all. We talked a bit but _nothing happened_ and more importantly nothing is going to happen. We are friends, that's it, and I don't know how long that's going to last. So can you stop with the comments about... more?"

"I'm sorry, Blaine, it's just you've always been so... into him and now he's here and you two seemed so close—"

"Firstly, I had a crush on an actor I'd never met before and as you and Mike pointed out last night, he's not really that guy. Secondly, it is possible to be close to a guy and not want him like that. Even if he is gay—"

"And gorgeous and smart and funny and has just about everything in common with you and looks at you like he's..."

"Like what?" Blaine prompted.

"I told you – I don't want you to get hurt. What happens when Kurt's finished filming? When he goes back to LA or New York or wherever his next movie is being done? What happens when he gets back with us tomorrow and Mercedes stops him from having any contact with you because you 'kidnapped' him this weekend?"

"Looks at me like what?" Blaine repeated softly.

"Like you look at him," she said. "Please, don't do anything stupid."

"Since when have I ever?" he asked with a soft laugh. "Come on, before they die of dehydration or something."

*

The evening started to slip into night and exhausted from the day, Rachel and Mike were the first to yawn and make their excuses before climbing into their tents. Mike had assured Blaine that the sinus meds he'd gone into town that evening to buy would kick in and therefore he wasn't likely to keep him awake should he want to return to their tent.

"You got plans for this evening?" Blaine asked Kurt as they plated up their shared meal. "I mean, Mike's talking about this late set but..."

"You have other ideas?" Kurt asked.

"Only if you want. And if you trust me."

"Why do I need to trust you?" Kurt said, his voice light but with an undercurrent of... something.

"I promise it is nothing dangerous or career damaging."

"Good to know."

"I have my own last night ritual for this festival," Blaine said, "and if you wanted to join me..."

"I'd love to," Kurt smiled.

Blaine didn't make any moves to go anywhere after they'd finished eating. Kurt watched him out of the corner of his eye, looking for any hints or clues that would give him away. He sat there while Mike and Rachel cleared up, didn't move from his seat by the tent (their tent) while his friends got changed into more appropriate gear for the evening performances. He even smiled as they wished him a good night before heading off.

"Blaine..." Kurt began but was cut off by a smile.

"They don't know," he said. "I mean, they know I go off somewhere but they don't know where. Or why."

"Why?" Kurt asked. "If this is something important to you..."

"It is," Blaine said, "which is why I want to share it with you. If you still want to."

"...Yeah," Kurt said. "If you're sure."

"I wouldn't have asked if I wasn't."

"OK. So where are we going?"

"You'll see," Blaine smiled. "Bring something warm."

"This does not fill me with confidence," Kurt laughed.

"You told me last night that you trusted me. So if you trust me enough to tell me... everything, trust me on this."

"I do trust you, Blaine. Really. It's just... I'm not used to letting go. For years it's been all on me. Mercedes is great but it was my image and therefore I needed to be careful about where I went and who I was seen with and..."

"You don't have to come," Blaine said. "I'm not going to... push you into anything."

"You're not, I promise. Ignore me, OK? This is all new for me."

"What is?"

"Having... someone like you in my life."

"I don't understand."

"Doesn't matter," Kurt said. "OK, warm clothing," he said, grabbing his jacket. "So where are we going?"

"Magical mystery tour," Blaine smiled. "Come on." He held out his hand and smiled when Kurt slipped his into it.

*

They dropped hands quickly – this was still Ohio after all – and discussed trivial things on their walk. From makeovers to reality TV to their go-to songs in the shower, the conversation filled the time so much that Kurt hadn't realised they'd come off the main road and were walking down an access road.

"Where are we?" Kurt asked.

"Buckeye Lake," Blaine said as they rounded a corner.

"It's... stunning."

"It's usually packed out but when the festival's on most people are there. I came here last year almost by accident. We'd just lost Regionals and I felt really bad about things."

"Why? It wasn't as if it was your fault. Was it?" Kurt asked.

"I didn't screw up if that's what you mean," Blaine laughed. "Well, not like... I'd just arrived at McKinley and as soon as they heard how good I was they wanted me to take joint lead with Rachel. She wasn't happy but in the end majority ruled. It was... awkward. I guess it was hard to buy a great love song ballad when the two leads won't even look at each other?"

"This year was better though?"

"Nationals, here we come," Blaine grinned, "although the whole 'act like I'm into Rachel' thing is still a little weird. Especially since..."

"Since what?" Kurt prompted.

"Since... we dated. Once."

"You... dated? I thought you were—"

"Post Regionals pity party, drunken game of spin the bottle, one kiss, whole week of confusion which is never to be spoken of again, you hear?"

"Be a bit hypocritical of me," Kurt said, holding his hands up. "Before I transferred to Dalton I tried to... put out an image shall we say?"

"Why do we do that?" Blaine asked as they reached the edge of the lake. "Self sabotage? I always knew who I was, always."

"Me too," Kurt said, joining Blaine as he sat down on the ground, "but I guess we think – hope maybe? – that it will make life easier."

"But it doesn't."

"Benefits of hindsight."

"But we know it, instinctively, even then."

"I think that when you know something is... going to be hard, possibly the hardest thing you're going to have to deal with in your life, there's a part of us that wants to avoid it. A kind of self-preservation maybe?"

"So the trick is to not listen to that little voice?" Blaine asked.

"Depends what it's saying and why," Kurt replied. "Something like lying about who you are? Ignore it."

"What about something you want?"

"Depends on the something," Kurt said, turning his head to look at Blaine.

When Blaine caught Kurt's movement out of the corner of his eye he started to turn but was quickly distracted. "Is that...?" he started, pointing upwards.

The pair of them looked up at the short streak of light across the stars.

"I don't think it's a plane," Kurt said, "so we're about to wish on a shooting star or a UFO."

"Totally aliens," Blaine deadpanned. "Ohio is the most interesting place for them to come. Not for experiments, but vacations."

"What if it wasn't?" Kurt asked. "A UFO I mean. What would you wish for?"

"I can't tell you that, it won't come true."

"Ah, but you haven't made the wish have you? And if you were to make it in future I'd never know so really the rule doesn't apply."

"I've already made my wish," Blaine said.

"What?"

"Years ago. I made my wish so I can't tell you. What would you wish for?"

"Me?" Kurt asked. "I... I don't know."

"Hard to think of what you want when you have everything you need?"

"Hardly," Kurt said, looking down at the line where the water began. "I miss a lot of things I don't have now. My friends at Dalton, my biggest worry being a History assignment that I've not started two days before it's due in. Friday night dinners with my dad or arguing about what to watch on TV with Finn. Carole's hot chocolate and home-made cakes that Dad has to beg for a sliver of because it's full of sugars and fats. He won't touch the healthy ones we make, say they taste 'wrong'.

"I miss being able to go out in public and not having to be dressed like this," he said, gesturing to his clothes. "I mean, the high fashion stuff is part of who he is but it came from somewhere. I've not worn flannel in a really long time."

"You wore it before?" Blaine asked, his brain skipping a few coherent thoughts at that image.

"I'm eighteen years old and anyone I'd have called a friend before now graduates this summer. In return for losing the best part of two years of my life, gaining a legion of fans, making a huge difference in the perception of LGBT teens across the country and a bank balance most people would kill for, I lost my life. I lost everyone I ever cared about..."

"You didn't lose your family," Blaine said. "The way Finn was proves that."

"He's... protective," Kurt said. "He's going to play with Ohio State you know? He knows he's not NFL material but he is good. Reckons he can get into coaching maybe? That was the one of the better things of this life. He lost out on a scholarship but I can afford his college fees. He hates that I'm paying for him, swears he'll pay me back but we both know that he doesn't have to.

"I can't go home unless it's the holidays and everyone's busy with their own lives so I just send money and convince myself that it makes it all better. Dad and Carole don't have a mortgage anymore, they got the honeymoon they lost because they had my school fees to pay, and—"

"They know you still love them," Blaine interrupted, "and I bet they know that if you could be there you would be."

"That's why I had to shoot this movie here."

"I know."

"I miss them. God, Blaine, I miss this life. I miss... being me, even if some days I don't quite know who that is."

"Well if you forget then just ask," Blaine said, his voice low and meaningful. "I think I've got a pretty good idea who the real Kurt is."

"Yeah? He a good kid?"

"Yeah," Blaine all but whispered. "He's... amazing."

"He has no idea what he's doing," Kurt said, holding Blaine's gaze. "He's... stuck in this life he's not sure he wants anymore."

"I don't want anything you don't—" Blaine started, biting on his lip. "You don't have to do anything you don't want to do. Not with me. And I... Tell me what you want."

"I..." Kurt began, then swallowed hard. "I want to finish high school. I want to tell people that I come from Ohio and that I have the best family anyone could ask for. I want to be able to go out without being followed by photographers and I want to be able to decide to do something without having to run it past anyone first.

"I want to be able to come out to music festivals without having to arrange a subterfuge the like of which is reserved for affairs and heists. I want to stop worrying about privacy and saying the right or wrong thing. I want to be able to sing without someone asking me when I'm releasing an album. I want to meet people and not wonder if they just want me for... him.

"I want to be eighteen years old, Blaine. I just want..."

"So be him," Blaine said.

"You make it sound so simple."

"It can be if you want it. There's this line from a movie that I love, that I think is just... a really good way to view life. _Nothing we ever wanted turned up, rang the bell and said 'here I am'. You have to go out there and get it._ "

Kurt laughed. " _So this is me, going out there and getting it. Getting you_ ," he quoted.

" _Who says I'm yours to get?_ "

" _Who says you're not?_ " Kurt finished, closing the gap between them and then everything stopped.

Blaine held his breath, his gaze moving from Kurt's eyes to his lips, just briefly. Right there, and it would be so simple, so easy to just...

He could do it. He could lean in and kiss him. A moment that he had, on more than one occasion, dreamt about. Fantasised about. And it could only be one kiss but that would be enough. It would be a good first kiss – the kind of first kiss that people write songs about.

Kurt wasn't moving, wasn't pulling back. He was holding there, just the same as Blaine, watching the same.

"Blaine..." he said quietly.

"I don't want you to do anything you don't want..."

"I'm not going anywhere," Kurt said.

This was real. This was real and this was really happening. This was...

"Last one in runs home!"

The scream tore through the mood and the two boys pulled back, scrambling to their feet just in time to see the group of lads come racing down the access road. Not noticing – or caring – about Kurt and Blaine they stopped only to strip down to their underwear before diving in, splashing and cheering and mocking the slowest of their group.

Before they could be noticed they were on their feet and heading back to the campsite. Anticipation and desire still ran through their veins so they didn't dare say anything, just walked as fast as they could without breaking into a run, hands brushing against the other every now and then and re-sparking the mood.

Blaine was trying hard not to think about what awaited them back at the festival as they showed their wristbands to security. A night in a tent together, close and...

As they approached the first line of tents Kurt looked over, catching Blaine's eye. The grins were instant and Blaine reached out, wrapping his fingers around the couple of Kurt's that he could grab and was rewarded with the best squeeze that Kurt could give him.

This was really going to happen. This was every wish and prayer and dream that Blaine had ever had since that first movie came out two Falls ago.

They made their way through the tents, heading towards their pitch towards the back, and as they rounded the last tent they stopped dead, their hearts sinking.

"Absolute disaster," Rachel announced, standing in front of what used to be her tent. "It's all Mike's fault."

"It is not," he protested.

"You were the one who fell on it!"

"Because you pushed me!"

"I was scared!"

"Of a shadow!"

"I didn't know that at the time, did I? I just saw something and—"

"You thought it was some murderer or creature?"

"I can't deal with this," Rachel said. "Kurt, I'm sharing with you tonight."

"Rachel—" Blaine started to protest.

"I can't share with _him_ ," Rachel said. "I'm sorry but I can't."

Blaine turned to look at Kurt. No, no this wasn't happening. This was not fair.

"It's fine, Rachel," Kurt said. "We can sort this out in the morning when we've all calmed down."

This was every kind of not fair

*

It wasn't Mike's snoring keeping Blaine awake but his own thoughts. He replayed every second of the conversation with Kurt at the lake, picking out cadences and gestures which seemed to suggest that Kurt at the very least shared his interest, his feelings – his desire? He viewed each of them critically, trying to convince himself that it was all in his mind, that he'd just projected years of wishing and thinking and hoping onto their conversation, that he was deluding himself into thinking that there was something more.

Except he wasn't able to. Every moment, every thought came back to that one by the water's edge, in the split second before other voices and people had intruded, and even though he lacked any personal experience he had enough of a working knowledge of these things to know that if they'd not been interrupted, if it had just been the two of them for five, ten, even one minute longer then they would have kissed.

If they'd got back and Rachel's tent wasn't ripped and unusable, if they'd been able to spend another night in the tent together… Panic flared a little in his chest at the thought of what could have happened but he was able to push it away, focus on the kiss that never was.

Blaine wondered what it would be like, not just kissing in general but kissing Kurt. Kissing him. He'd spent longer than he would ever admit watching and re-watching this one scene from Kurt's first movie. The kiss, _that_ kiss. At the time it had been somewhat controversial; a gay kiss up on the big screen and without the R rating that certain groups wanted. Buying the DVD day the day of release Blaine had obsessed over that scene, studying the way the characters moved, the way they met the other, the way that it looked like the most natural thing in the world – like they were meant for this, meant for each other.

And he hoped that his first kiss would be like that. Days and nights spent imagining that guy, the first guy he'd want to be with, want to kiss and hold and be held and to have that promise. After that movie Blaine had, on many occasions, imagined Kurt being that first kiss.

He turned his head to look at Mike, sleeping in ignorance of the effect he'd had on the night, and he wondered – hoped – that he and Kurt would have time to talk when they got back to Lima, time to pick up where they left off, time to work out what this thing was between them, time to work out where it was going, where it could go.

Time, however, was not on his side.

*

They'd been given a short break between scenes and Cooper, having finally mustered up the courage, pulled his chair up alongside Kurt's.

"Good weekend?" he asked.

"Fine," Kurt replied, not looking up from the screen of his iPad. "You?"

"Yeah, fine, nothing much. I mean, my plans fell through and Blaine was away at the festival so it was just me and the parents." Cooper watched Kurt's as he spoke, and smiled when he saw the faint twitch around his eyes. "You enjoy the festival?"

"What?" Kurt asked, finally looking up.

"Well, Blaine disappears for the weekend, you disappear for the weekend sending Mercedes into meltdown – and I really thought she was going to hit you on Monday by the way – and I know he had an extra ticket for the weekend."

"So why does that mean I went with him?"

"Because I know he packed our tent but when he got home Sunday he told Mom that he was exhausted because Mike had been snoring all night and kept him awake. So why would Mike snoring keep him awake if he was in his own tent? Conclusion: someone else was in his tent and Blaine was sharing with Mike, because that's the sort of guy my brother is. He's a gentleman. He's kind and honest and he cares. A lot."

Cooper turned so he was no longer looking at Kurt but watching the crew set up for the next scene. "If someone were to get close to him, if he let someone get close to him, then they would be able to do a lot of damage if they weren't careful. Blaine's an 'all or nothing' kind of guy. You get his trust or you don't. You get his respect or you don't. And I know that when he finally meets that guy? They'll get his heart, all of it, and he won't hold anything back, not even at the start.

"Which of course means that this guy, whoever he might be, could really hurt him. Like if they're not sure, or if they can't give him everything he wants. He doesn't have to do it all right away, of course, I'm talking long term. Blaine'll stick around out of hope, waiting for the relationship to develop, to grow to that point. But if that guy has no intention of getting there with him, or maybe even can't go there with him? Trust me, I know my little brother. It will kill him."

"Has he ever… had a boyfriend?" Kurt asked carefully, trying to look like he was still reading the page on his tablet.

"Not that I know of for sure but I'm pretty sure he hasn't. He's not talked to me about anyone and like I said, all or nothing."

"Cooper…"

"He has been staring at his cell phone all week," Cooper said quietly. "I don't know what happened, I don't want to know details because that's between you two. But I know you went with them and I know something happened between the two of you.

"I don't know if you talked about this, but you need to let him down gently, you hear me? In less than two weeks we are done here and I know you're going off to New York for the next movie. You've spent this week looking like nothing's changed and he's spent it looking like the world has ended. This is more than some… fan thing, you know? He really likes you, Kurt. And you're either in for all or for nothing."

"Mercedes has been watching me like a hawk," Kurt said quietly.

"Which stops you from sending a text? An email?"

"I'm pretty sure she's checking my history," Kurt said with a hollow laugh. "If she found out about Blaine then it would be so much worse for him. I'm not pulling him into this life so he can lose what privacy he does have. Would you want this life for him? We both know what happens when the media find out we're seeing someone."

"I think that's a decision Blaine needs to make for himself," Cooper replied. "If someone were to give him the chance to make it that is."

"And if I already know his answer?"

"Then you already know what you need to do. But do it soon, yeah? Mom's worried he's coming down with something and I think she's about five minutes away from hauling him off to the doc's."

"This weekend. I promise."

"If you're going to break his heart… be gentle."

"Coop?"

"Yeah?" he asked, turning to see that Kurt had lifted his head to look at him.

"Thanks."

"He's my little brother."

"Can you…? I mean, don't—"

"Not a word, I promise," Cooper said, miming locking his mouth. Then he 'unlocked' it and grinned. "Be hard to do the scene," he quipped, 'pocketing' the key.

Kurt found himself laughing for the first time all week and he went back to his iPad. The page was filled with downloaded emails that he and Finn had exchanged over the previous six months, updates on family and life in general. Whenever he read them he used to feel a small pang in his chest, something he'd come to associate with homesickness, but here, in Ohio, just a few blocks away from the house he'd grown up in until New York had stolen him away? It felt warm, nestled somewhere deep and secure.

*

Blaine looked up in panic when he heard his name screamed down the hallway and he saw Rachel pushing her away against the crowd to come and join him.

"Have you heard?" she asked, voice high pitched with excitement.

"Heard what?"

"Oh my god! Kurt's asked to meet you, this afternoon after school in the choir room."

Blaine's mouth was suddenly dry and his heartbeat picked up a pace. "What?"

"Mr Schue just saw me and told me to come and find you and tell you to be in the choir room after school today because Kurt Hummel, _the_ Kurt Hummel, wants to talk to you."

"He said that? He actually said that?"

"Mr Schue stopped me just now in the hallway and I asked if this was about my song suggestions for Regionals and he just smiled and told me to come and find you because, and I quote, 'Kurt Hummel wants to talk to you about something'."

Blaine would have fallen over had the lockers not been there for him to sag against as he ran through all the possibilities. Why now? What did he want to say? Why in the choir room? Why pass on the message through Mr Schue?

"You OK?" Rachel asked, noticing his reaction. "Blaine?" When he didn't respond she grabbed his hand and pulled him into a nearby classroom. "Tell me."

"It's nothing."

"Kurt Hummel, your lifelong crush and new friend, wants to speak to you and you act like it's the worst thing that could happen to you instead of an amazing opportunity."

"Opportunity to do what?"

"To tell him how you feel," Rachel said with the tone of one who felt she was stating the obvious. "I know this is more than just a fanboy crush now, isn't it?"

"I don't know what it is," Blaine admitted. "I thought I did but then he… I've not heard a thing from him since we said goodbye on Sunday."

"What? But I thought you two were like, text buddies or something now."

"I've sent him a few messages and emails but he's not replied. I stopped on Tuesday because I didn't want to come across as one of those stalker types but… What does he want to say to me that he needs to see me face to face? And why now, at the end of the week? Oh god, he's going to tell me to back off, isn't he? I've pushed it too far and he's doing it today because everyone leaves right away on a Friday so there won't be a crowd and I've screwed this up and—"

"OK, Blaine, honey, you need to breathe," Rachel said, putting her hands on his arms just below his shoulders, guiding him to perch on the edge of the teacher's desk. "If you want me to come with you then I can," she offered. "That way you won't have to face it on your own?"

"I'm not sure I want a witness to my humiliation," Blaine said.

"I swear, whatever happens between you two this afternoon, I won't say a word. Not even to Mike. Not even to my dads!"

"You swear?" Blaine asked, his eyes narrowing a little in suspicion.

In response, Rachel raised her right hand and put her left over her heart. "I swear on my dads' lives, my entire Barbra collection and my dreams of getting into NYADA that I, Rachel Berry, will not breathe a word about whatever happens between you and Kurt tonight. I swear that I will support you and help you and no matter what, I will still love you."

"Thank you," Blaine whispered. "Love you too."

"Hey, maybe it's not as bad as you think," Rachel said as she looped her arms around Blaine's neck in a hug. "Maybe he wants to apologise for the radio silence in person?"

"Maybe," Blaine mumbled into her shoulder.

"Hey, maybe he wants to take you out tonight," she exclaimed, pulling back a little. "Maybe he's got a private jet waiting at the airport and if you say yes – and please say yes – he's going to fly you off to some exotic and private location where it's just the two of you and no friends to get in the way of your makeout plans."

Blaine looked at her with narrowing eyes.

"I'm not stupid," she declared. "It took me a little while to figure out but Saturday night, you two? I really messed it up for you, didn't I?"

"If it were meant to be," Blaine said, pulling her back in, "then it would have happened anyway."

"There's still time," she said. "I'm going to make it my mission to get you that kiss, Blaine Anderson."

"Why?" he asked. "I mean, you don't have to and—"

"I want you to be happy and I think Kurt might actually make you really happy. Plus he's got a really gorgeous brother…"

She tailed off as the pair of them broke into giggles. Eventually Blaine felt ready to face the lunchtime crowds so they stepped out into the hallway. Right into the path of two large slushies.


	5. Chapter 5

The rest of lunchtime was spent changing into their emergency outfits and they only just made it to their last class of the day. Taking their seats at the back of the room, Blaine and Rachel tried hard to focus on what the teacher was saying but both of their minds were already in that choir room, playing out different scenarios of how the afternoon might go.

Blaine's thoughts were sober; conversations about the reality of the situation – him here in Ohio, Kurt in New York and LA and everywhere else. Him a high school student, Kurt a famous movie star. Rachel was the more romantic of the two; dreams of Blaine and Kurt falling in love, getting married, maybe a few kids (maybe she'd be their surrogate!) and a dog somewhere down the line. And of course then she'd get to meet the handsome step-brother properly and then her imaginings were on their wedding and their kids and their dog.

The downside to this daydreaming meant that they didn't pay full attention in class which had did not go unnoticed. As the bell rang the two of them were called forward and chastised in no uncertain terms about their lack of effort. The pair of them agreed with their teacher, apologised profusely for their behaviour and swore it would never happen again, anything to get them out of there as quickly as possible.

Five minutes late they ran down the hallways to the choir room, stopping just around the corner when Blaine pulled up short.

"What?" Rachel asked, gasping for breath.

"I just need a minute," he said. "I just… give me a minute."

"Blaine, we're late! You don't want to keep him waiting now, do you?"

"I'm not going in there red-faced and panting like a dog in summer," he replied. "And I need to work out what I'm going to say."

"You are going to say nothing," she said firmly, reaching out and adjusting his bow tie a little. "You are going to shut up and listen to him and then you are either going to accept his offer of a private jet date, or you are going to say goodbye and leave. That's it. No begging, that's not your style."

"But what if he…?"

"Blaine!" she snapped. "Listen to me. Two possibilities here. One, he likes you too and you are going to work something out. In which case you will get out of here and go for coffee somewhere – hopefully his trailer – and you will talk. Two, he's very sorry but he doesn't feel the same way. In which case you will smile, nod, get out of there and then we will go back to mine and raid my dads' supply of ice cream all weekend.

"And me, your best friend, will be waiting right there no matter what, OK?"

"OK," he said. "And thank you? In case I forget to say it later—"

"Because you're busy making out in his trailer?"

"You really are an optimist, aren't you?" he laughed.

"I just know when something's meant to be when I see it. My dads, Mike and Tina, you and Kurt."

"Here's hoping," Blaine said. He held out his hand and smiled when Rachel grabbed it. "Ready?"

"Let's do this," she grinned.

The pair of them rounded the corner and walked the short distance to the choir room door. When they walked in they stopped suddenly, looking around them.

"Hey guys, glad you got the message, Blaine," Mr Schue said. "I knew Rachel would see you before I did, gave me time to go over the details with the director, speak to the office about release forms and all that."

"What's going on?" Rachel asked, looking around the assembled glee club, along with the people who were obviously part of the film crew, spotting Cooper and Kurt – Mercedes half a step behind him – standing in the corner.

"I'll let these guys explain," Mr Schue said, gesturing that they should take a seat.

As soon as they were seated among their friends Mr Schue gave up the floor to Kurt.

"I'm not going to waste time with introductions," Kurt began, "you know me and thanks to my co-star over here—" he said, gesturing to Cooper who gave a big wave and a wink directed at Blaine, "—I know you. I used to be in my school's glee club so I know what pressure you're under to do well. But from what I've heard I don't see any reason why you shouldn't do well at Regionals and Nationals this year.

"But that's not why I'm here. As you may or may not know, scripts are constantly revised and sometimes we have to move around filming days for various reasons. To cut a long story short, we're filming an assembly scene in the gymnasium tomorrow and the band that had been booked to perform had to pull out."

"Tragic accident," Cooper added with an incongruous grin on his face. "Broken bones, destroyed instruments, the works."

"We need performers and I'd like to ask if you guys wanted to be in the movie," Kurt continued, trying to ignore Cooper. "We can't pay you guys I'm afraid, union rules, but I've spoken to the director and what we're going to do is make a donation to your glee budget. Something to help you fund your Nationals trip?"

"You're asking us to be in the movie?" Santana asked. "A proper movie?"

"Yes, a proper movie," Kurt smiled. "We had a chat with Mr Schue before you guys arrived and there are a couple of performances that you've done already that would fit with the scene. We need to know by five this evening which one you want to do but we thought that you should have that choice."

"Is this for real?" Puck asked. "'cause I feel like any second now Mr Demi Moore is going to jump out on us."

"It's real," Mr Schue said. "You all need to get your parents to sign a release form by tomorrow morning but beyond that, we get to perform."

The club descended into excited laughter and discussions, except for Blaine and Rachel who were sitting in stunned silence. Rachel risked a glance across at Blaine who was still looking at Kurt, almost willing him to look in his direction, but not once did he do so. In fact, during the whole speech Kurt had done a very good job of _avoiding_ looking at Blaine.

It might not have been exactly the answer he was expecting, but it was the same response.

*

Friday night involved rehearsing _Don't Stop Believing_ over and over to make sure that they had it down perfectly for the next day's shooting. Every parent signed the form as their children begged, pleaded and bargained with a month's worth of chores if needed. A few – Blaine's and Rachel's among them – needed no convincing at all and happily signed the form before their kids returned to the school for further practice.

Mr Schue treated them all to pizza and when it arrived they took a break, separating into small groups to discuss what their thirty seconds of fame would mean to their future careers in the spotlight.

"You OK?" Rachel asked as she joined Blaine in his corner. "You've not said much since…"

"Wasn't my rejection but I think we can still call it that," Blaine said, picking at the topping on his slice. "He couldn't even look at me, Rachel."

"I am sorry, Blaine, I truly am, but—"

"No," Blaine said firmly. "Don't. You don't get to try and put a spin on this. Don't try and come up with reasons like 'he couldn't do anything in front of all of us' or 'maybe when we're filming tomorrow' because I don't want to hear it. It's done, I'm over it. Over him."

"Over who?" Mike asked, coming over to join them.

"Kurt," Rachel said. "Blaine's done with him apparently."

"But I thought you two were… y'know," Mike said, waving his pizza in an all-encompassing gesture.

"We're nothing," Blaine said, taking a large bite of his slice, hoping that if he couldn't answer any more questions they would leave him alone.

"How's Tina?" Rachel asked Mike, changing the topic.

"Upset that she's missing out on this, but Mr Schue said that she could probably be part of the crowd? He's checking it out tomorrow."

"When is she going to be fully fit? Only with Regionals coming up…"

"She'll be back by then," Mike said. "She's doing lots of physio and has promised herself that she won't miss out."

"Tell her that we miss her," Rachel said, earning herself a look of shock from Mike. "What? She's a key member of our group."

"To do what?" Blaine said, finding his voice around his food. "Sing your backup?"

"You and I both know that we only have one year left," Rachel said firmly. "Tina has two. So does Artie and, well if Brittany graduates I'll be surprised. Tina will take over this club, lead it on when we're gone. So while she's not at my level of talent just yet she has the potential to be and now that you've decided to join back in the conversation, Mr Anderson, you need to stop wallowing and listen.

"You and Kurt, this thing? There's more to it and we all can see that. I swear you could rattle off some obscure facts about that boy but every conversation I watched you guys have last weekend you never assumed anything. You asked him how he took his coffee, you asked what he thought about things, what he liked, what he didn't. You never once came across as the obsessed fan that we all sometimes like to think that you are and that is because of one simple fact."

"And what is that?" Blaine asked, his tone almost bitter.

"You're not a _fan_ anymore," Rachel said.

"She's right," Mike added. "We've seen you when interviews come out or there's a trailer for one of his films. You act like this… excited puppy," he said, grinning at his genius analogy. "It's the _best thing ever_ and _he's so amazing and absolutely fantastic_."

"And then we watch you guys and it's a whole other kind of puppy," Rachel picked up. "You weren't bouncing all over the place, you were just there. With him. Listening and… loving him." Those last two words were said in little more than a whisper as she watched her friend's face. It was a moment of realisation for the three of them and they all just stopped.

"Don't matter though, does it?" Blaine said, wrapping what was left of his pizza in a napkin and getting to his feet. "Because why would he feel the same about some kid stuck in Ohio for another year? He—" Blaine stopped himself from saying that Kurt had worked hard to escape from here but even now, even to his best friends he couldn't betray Kurt's confidence. If nothing else he would forever have that. "He lives in New York, he works all over the country. He earns more money in a year than I could in a lifetime and he is changing how this country thinks and feels about gay kids. What do I have to offer him?"

He walked away, dropping his food in the bin as he left the room.

"Everything," Rachel said, mostly to herself. "Offer him everything."

*

Saturday was the seventh level of hell for Blaine, he was sure of it. On the one hand it was amazing to be on set, to be a part of something like this. Although he knew, in his heart, that he was bound for the stage, the idea of being in front of a camera was growing on him. Maybe he would have to find out more about it?

In between takes Cooper would come over and talk to the club, answering as many of their questions as he could, no matter how inane they were. Kurt, on the other hand, seemed to keep his distance, seeking refuge with Mercedes and always so deep in conversation that Blaine didn't dare even risk interrupting them.

"Try to look like you're enjoying yourself," Rachel hissed at him, "this is supposed to be a school celebration and you look like someone ran over your bow tie collection."

"Isn't that analogy usually done with a dog?" Blaine asked.

"You don't have a dog and you'd be more devastated if it happened to your ties," she pointed out. "Kurt?"

"I guess I thought – hoped that he'd come over and talk to me today."

"He's not spoken to anyone but that dragon of a PA so I don't think you can read much into it."

"Dragon?"

"I needed a restroom break and when she saw me walking away she barked at me, Kurt, and never has an adjective been so appropriate. For one second I thought she had actually barked at me. She's fierce, wouldn't like to get on her bad side."

"Right," Blaine said, not really paying attention.

"And I think Kurt's in her bad books."

"Why?"

"His little weekend flit with us? I overheard a couple of the other actors talking; when he got back on the Monday she was livid with him. They were in his trailer and pretty much everyone could still hear her going on about how she's responsible for him and how he's got these commitments he needs to honour—"

"Is there a point to this torture? Because I'm about to issue a ban on all Kurt related topics."

"The point is, my dear friend, that Kurt can't step out of line at the moment. She's watching him like a hawk and I don't think he could come and talk to you even if he wanted to. And what you said about him being who he is and you being who you are? I bet she's told Kurt that too and 'reminded' him that it won't work."

"I'm glad I talked you out of trying to join the Cheerios," Blaine said, "if this is your idea of a pep talk."

"You were just worried I'd cramp your style," she quipped.

"But my plan worked; it got you to recognise my talent and prove that I could keep up with you vocally."

"This is true. And I do love that NYADA is our dream and that we're going to get in together and—oh you _sneaky_ little…!" She hit him playfully on the arm when she realised that he'd managed, albeit only temporary, to change the topic of conversation. "I don't want you to give up hope that's all."

"I'm… being realistic. I need to stop acting like one of those crazed fans you see online. I met the guy, we hung out a bit, that's it. We're not best friends, we're not boyfriends or anything more than two people who spent a bit of time together. As soon as this movie is done he goes back to his life and I become some kid he might remember hanging out with for a while but that's it. And I know you want us to get married and have babies and live happily ever after but that's not going to happen. You'll have more luck getting a date with Finn than I would with Kurt."

"See, in my view we're both happy. Successful, in love with wonderful men, and happy."

"How do you know Finn is wonderful?"

Rachel shrugged. "He and Kurt get on, they're brothers—"

"Step-brothers."

"—and Kurt doesn't seem like the kind of person to put up with people who aren't wonderful. So therefore Finn must be wonderful."

"Sometimes I think your logic doesn't exist in the same reality as the rest of ours."

"Yeah, but wouldn't you rather be in mine?"

"I'm… going to go use the bathroom," Blaine said. "I'll be back before we're needed for the shot."

Without waiting for her to respond he got to his feet and left the gym, heading for the nearest bathroom. Once safely inside he headed for the sink, putting his hands on the cool porcelain and staring at his reflection.

Rachel was right. He wanted to believe. He wanted to accept any version of an explanation that had Kurt wanting him as much in return. He wanted to think that what happened at the festival was real, that Kurt wanted to kiss him, be with him. He wanted to be able to dream of a time when he wasn't stuck in Ohio and he wanted to know that he would follow Kurt anywhere.

And that stopped him.

Today had been enough of a revelation that maybe there was something other than the stage for him, but this? Could he do this?

"Don't be stupid," he told his reflection. While he _could_ give up everything to follow Kurt around, he knew that he wouldn't be truly happy in that life.

"Which one of you is stupid; you or the reflection?"

Blaine's hand slipped off the sink in shock as he heard Kurt's voice, crystal clear and _here_ with him.

"Hi," Blaine managed to say, mainly because he didn't know how to respond to Kurt's flippant remark.

"Hey," Kurt said "Look, I—"

"Kurt, I—"

They both started and stopped together, giving small laughs as they did so.

"You first," Blaine said.

"I'm sorry," Kurt said. "I know I should have said something or replied to one of your messages but… I couldn't."

"Right."

"I had the _best_ time last weekend, thank you, it was the… distraction I needed."

"Right," Blaine said again, this time a little cooler.

"It's just, I—"

"Don't worry about it," Blaine said quickly. "What I wanted to say was that I'm sorry too. I know I've been a bit… full on recently. I didn't mean to… get so close I guess. After being a fan for so long and then being near you… I think I slipped into 'obsessed fan' territory and I shouldn't have."

This time it was Kurt's turn to respond with, "Right".

"I like you, Kurt. As a fan. And I'm sorry for overstepping."

"No, it's fine—"

"I should have known better, I always swore that if I ever met you I'd not be this crazy person and—"

"You were never that crazy person, Blaine, trust me. I've met more than my fair share and… you weren't."

"But I did go too far and I'm sorry. I meant it when I said you didn't... I mean, you don't…" He took a deep breath and started again. "I let myself get caught up in a moment and you don't need to feel sorry about anything."

"For what it's worth, I loved every moment of the weekend," Kurt said. "It was nice to… to be me again. Just for a little while before I had to come back to this."

"Why do you do that?" Blaine asked. "Why do you pretend to be someone you're not?"

"Because… it's easier," Kurt said. "Because—"

"Is it what you want?" _Am I what you want? Do you really want to give it all up? Be a normal teenager? Which life do you want, Kurt? One with me?_

"I want to do the right thing."

"By who? Yourself? Or people out there who think you're something you're not?"

"I'm eighteen years old and I'm gay, that's not a lie, Blaine. I love performing, I love what I do. I hate that my friends are moving on with their lives and I hate that I technically still have my senior year to go, assuming I can get the work done in-between movies and scenes. I hate that I'm away from my dad so much when he's been so sick, especially recently when his check-up wasn't the clean bill of health we all wanted.

"I hate that I feel like I haven't had the chance to breathe properly since being discovered but I love that I got the chance to this weekend. I love what I get to do but I hate that I'm not… me."

"You think we won't still like you if we knew you came from Ohio instead of New York? That you protected your family – and a sick father – from media intrusion because you wanted to protect them? This life is still here, Kurt. Your family are still here and from what I saw with Finn I reckon he could handle a few members of the press."

"Finn? Yeah, probably. And Carole's pretty much no-nonsense. But Dad…? He's not exactly at death's door, he does OK. He's got to be careful about what he eats, exercise, avoid stress, all of that. And having your wife and sons and whole life playing out under the watchful gaze of the media is stressful.

"People want to know about my family, my background. There's not a day goes by that some gossip columnist isn't digging around, trying to find out what school I went to, who knew me. I got lucky in that the Warblers and everyone at Dalton have protected me, and as for my old school – well, I guess no one wants to admit to being the ones who made my life hell? I don't know."

"You can have whatever life you want, Kurt. If you're unhappy then do something about it."

"I'm not unhappy," Kurt said, his voice a little clipped. "No one is one hundred percent happy with their life, there's always something that we wish was different. Being thinner, having straight hair instead of curls, blue eyes instead of brown. Taller, shorter, more popular, smarter, stronger, the list goes on. This is my list. This one thing."

"It's a huge thing."

"Blaine—"

"If last weekend was you, the real you? Then let me tell you something. I like him a hell of a lot more than…"

"Than what, Blaine?" Kurt said when he trailed off. "Than _who_?"

"I mean—"

"No, I get it. We both know where we stand now, don't we?"

"…I guess."

"We'd better get back. They'll be calling for us soon."

"Thanks. For this I mean. The opportunity."

"It'll look good on your NYADA application," Kurt said as he held the door for Blaine.

It wasn't until they were back in the gym, back on set and in their places that Blaine realised what Kurt had said, what it probably meant.

Had he done this for him? Him and Rachel?

*

He thought about this all Saturday night and Sunday, changed his mind a dozen times but when Blaine got to school Monday morning his mind was made up. Very quietly and without any hesitation (because that would lead to second thoughts which would lead to third then fourth and so on until insanity set in or it was time for him to graduate) he slowly began to take down the pictures from his locker door.

It was time to move on.

"Wow. Really?" Rachel asked quietly as she came up beside him.

"Yeah," he said, taking down the last picture and putting it into his bag. "I just… I can't, Rachel. Not anymore."

"I'm so sorry," she whispered. "I really thought he… I'm so, so sorry, Blaine."

"It's not your fault," Blaine replied, giving her a weak smile as he closed his locker. "Even with the tent thing. In fact, that was probably a good thing. Stopped me from… Well, if I'd been rejected afterwards that would have been worse."

"I just can't believe he did that."

"You don't know him, Rach. For that matter, I don't know him. We know this… perception of him."

"That wasn't who you fell—"

"Enough," he said quietly, his voice tinged with sadness. "It's… enough now."

"OK."

"Really?"

"I promised to support you no matter what, remember? This is me supporting you."

"Even though a part of you thinks I'm making a mistake?"

"To be honest I think Kurt is the one making the mistake but it is your choice and I need to respect that."

Blaine eyed her critically. "OK, who are you and what have you done with the real Rachel Berry?"

"Hey!" she protested, hitting him lightly on the arm.

"Mike spoke to you, didn't he?"

"…Yeah," she admitted. "He gave this whole 'it's his life' speech and I know he's right but you two are _so good together_ and I just—"

"Need to let it go?"

She sighed, letting her eyes drift shut. "Positives in this. Now we can focus on winning Regionals and then there's nothing stopping us from going to Nationals."

"There's the Rachel I know and love."

"She loves you too you know? Always will, no matter what stupid boys do."

"I know," he smiled before offering her his arm and they walked away from his locker.

*

Blaine's plan to forget about Kurt Hummel lasted until lunchtime. He was already debating whether or not to use his afternoon study period at home when his phone burst into life. The call was from an unknown number, something he usually ignored, but for some reason he answered it.

He was silent as he listened to the person on the other end of the phone before telling them, "I will, I promise" and hanging up. Then, ignoring Rachel and Mike's surprised questions, he picked up his bag and left.

*

"I know that, but can you just pass a message to him?" Blaine asked, wondering how he was going to get it through to this security guard. "That's it. One message and if he doesn't want to talk to me after that then I will leave."

"I can't," the guard said, firmly but with a note of fondness in his voice.

"What about Cooper? He's my brother—Still no?"

"Still no."

"I wouldn't be doing this if it weren't important, really important. It's just one little message and I swear, I won't bother you or anyone else again if you'd just give it to him."

"If I gave the actors every message a fan wanted to pass on then I'd never get another job again. Sorry, kid."

"But this isn't a fan message," Blaine said, his mind racing. "This is important."

"They all are."

"This one really is. Look, please. Just… tell Kurt that Blaine got a call. Elias' dad is in the hospital; his step-mom just called me because she couldn't get hold of Kurt. Tell him that. He'll want to know, I promise you."

"And who's this Elias kid?"

"Someone Kurt knows. Please? Like I said, it's important and I swear I wouldn't be here if it wasn't."

The guard sighed for a moment before gesturing to a colleague to take his spot for a few moments.

Blaine bounced on the balls of his feet in nerves while he waited for the guard to come back. _What if he doesn't tell Kurt? What if he is just pretending to in order to get me to go away?_ He tried to think of different ways he could sneak into the classroom they were using. The two exits would be manned of course but didn't Puck sneak out of detention in that room by using the janitor's cupboard? Something about roof tiles and crawl spaces and Blaine was just starting to wonder if Puck would tell him without asking too many questions when the guard came back.

"Did you--?" Blaine started but was silenced when Kurt appeared behind him, white faced and clearly worried.

"My cell's been off, Mercedes has it," Kurt said. "Did you--?"

"She called me when she couldn't get you."

"I need to go," Kurt said, mostly to himself as he walked around the security guard.

"I've got my car today, I'll give you a lift," Blaine heard himself offer and the pair of them walked off, ignoring the calls of the guards behind them.

*

"Did she say anything?" Kurt asked when they were in the safety of Blaine's car. "Is he--?"

"She didn't tell me much, just that your dad had been admitted and that she couldn't get hold of you. She didn't want to contact the set if she didn't have to and remembered that she had my cell number."

"Thank you," Kurt said in little more than a whisper.

"I'm sure he's fine."

"You don't know that."

"Carole didn't seem that worried when I spoke to her. Well, she was worried but not in a _you need to get him here now_ kind of way. If she had then I'd have…"

"Have what?" Kurt asked when Blaine trailed off.

"I don't know," Blaine admitted with a laugh. "Stormed the set maybe? Broken in? I was working on my Plan B when you turned up. For which I will be forever grateful."

"I'd have liked to have seen you try and sneak in," Kurt said with a hint of real humour in his voice. "I'm picturing abseiling from the ceiling mid-take, grabbing me and lifting me above the crowd and out of reach."

"I thought this was some coming-of-age movie, not an action adventure blockbuster," Blaine quipped.

"I'm all for cross-genre media."

"Might get a bit confusing though."

"True," Kurt mused, staring blankly out of the window.

"And we know what the critics are like. Maybe in your next picture?"

"Gives you time to practice too."

"And who says I need it? I might be the abseiling champion of Lima for all you know."

"Is that a thing? Because that should be a thing. I'd like to see that, you abseiling down…"

"The school?" Blaine asked.

"A multi-story parking lot. With cars driving about the place for added danger."

"Off a bridge?"

"That church over by the mall, the one with the huge spire?"

"The hospital," Blaine said without thinking and the one thing they had been doing a good job of avoiding came back full force. "He'll be fine."

"You don't know that."

"I know that you're stubborn and you had to have got that from somewhere."

"Stubborn isn't enough sometimes."

"But sometimes it makes a difference. And we both know that if it were that serious, if it were that bad then Carole would have called the set and she wouldn't have cared who found out where you're from."

"First thing tomorrow I'm getting my cell back from Mercedes," Kurt said, his voice low and verging on dangerous. "I should have been contactable. I should never have let her take it in the first place, I knew Dad wasn't great. How could I have been so stupid?"

"It's not stupid to think that this stuff won't happen," Blaine said as they pulled into the hospital parking lot. "You couldn't have predicted this."

He pulled into a free space and turned off the engine.

"Come in with me?" Kurt asked.

"OK."

"It's just… I don't know where Carole is or if Finn knows and if she's off with Dad I really can't do being on my own and—"

"It's fine, Kurt, really," Blaine said, reaching across without thinking and putting his hand over Kurt's. "Come on."

Blaine resisted the urge to grab Kurt's hand once they were out of the car, falling into step beside him instead. They approached the front desk where Kurt gave his name and asked after his father. When they didn't give him any information – or tell him what he wanted to hear (that it had all been some big mistake, his father wasn't here) – Kurt seemed to be on the verge of a meltdown.

Taking his arm just below his elbow, Blaine steered him towards a relatives room which was free, guiding him inside and shutting the door.

"Why can't they tell me what's going on? I'm his son, I should know. What are they hiding?"

"Probably nothing, Kurt. She's a receptionist, I bet she doesn't know anything about his condition so she calls someone who does know, someone who can answer all of your questions."

"I just have one. I need to know if he's going to be OK."

"He'll be fine—"

"You don't know that, Blaine."

"No, I know but—"

"Then you can't say things like that. You can't act like everything's going to be OK when you don't know that it is. You weren't here when he had his heart attack, no one was. He was dating Carole but they weren't… It was just me, Blaine. It was just me and I sat by that bed thinking that I'd lost Mom and if I lost him then I would have no one. And for the last year, even though things have been OK, I still think that."

"But you wouldn't be on your own. Carole and Finn—"

"You don't get it Blaine, and how could you? You have your home and your family and not once have you had to deny them – although I'd understand about Cooper if you did – and you get to see them and be with them and I know they're not perfect but no family is. But they're yours, Blaine. Undeniably yours.

"And Carole is great, she's amazing. I love her and she's the perfect step-mom but she's not my mom. And Finn's not really my brother even though he tries to be. They're not mine, Blaine, Dad is. Dad is all I have left and if I lose him then that's it."

"You're wrong," Blaine said firmly. "You will still have a family, even if they're not blood. It doesn't matter if they were there from the minute you were born or if they turned up late, the fact is they turned up. I spoke to Carole, I heard what she sounded like when she asked me to get you. She was worried about _you_ , Kurt. She was worried about how you would react and I think that maybe she called me not to try and protect you but so you'd have someone with you."

"Really? You got all that from a phone call?" Kurt mocked.

"Yeah, I did actually," Blaine snapped back. "Her husband is in hospital and all she could think about was you. So I know, without a doubt, that even if the worst does happen you are not going to be on your own."

"But it won't be the same—"

"When you've talked about her all you've done is talk about how great she is, how much you like her, all the things you do together. How she knows when you've called just because you just want to hear familiar voices or because you just need that touch of home. You called her _home_ , Kurt. And given how protective Finn was of you I don't think he's going to think 'that's it' either.

"God, why do you always make things into more trouble than they need to be? You're miserable like this and the only person who was getting hurt was just you which was bad enough but then I got dragged into this and—"

"Well if that's how you feel then maybe you should just go!" Kurt yelled.

"I was going to stick around, see how he is but if you don't want me here then—" Blaine gave a small laugh. "Of course you don't want me here, you've made that clear."

"What?"

"You know I used to look up to you. I used to think that you had it all. You were smart and brave, you didn't care who knew you were gay and it became a part of who you are rather than something that defined you. Because of you I felt more comfortable coming out. After… when I got to McKinley, because of you, things were different and I could be myself. You inspired me to be better, to dream bigger and I don't know if I'd have thought of NYADA otherwise.

"And then spending time with you I got to see _you_ , who you really are and that… That I don't know about. You hide away in New York pretending to be someone that you're not because you were told that it would 'look better'. You're scared of losing your dad, and I get it I do, but part me is starting to wonder if you feel like this because you wonder if you've already lost him. Like turning your back on him and your life here wasn't just a step too far."

"You have no idea—"

"No, I don't!" Blaine all but yelled. "I don't understand how you could do that but more than that I don't understand why you think you can't be who you are. Because I've seen that guy and you know what? I like him. I really like him and a few months ago I would have said that yeah, I love Kurt Hummel. And it would have been that guy I see on my TV and in movie theatres and in magazines. Then the other week I would have struggled to answer because I had gotten to know this other guy, one who's smart and funny and has opinions on _everything_ no matter what it is. And he's interested in me and what's going on in my life and I got to tell him stuff I haven't told anyone, not even Rachel or Mike, because he made me feel like I could trust him with anything. With _everything_. And more than that I wanted to.

"I wish I knew which Kurt to actually fall for. The poster boy who basically saved my life last year, or the flawed but imperfectly perfect guy who screws up from time to time but basically makes me feel like anything is possible. Because that guy? He's someone worth knowing. He's interesting and smart and he doesn't claim to have all the answers but that's OK, he's just figuring it out with the rest of us.

"And he's not perfect but I think he is and he doesn't think he's worth the attention and that just makes him…" Blaine trailed off, unsure of how to finish that sentence – or if he should finish it at all. "I should go."

He started to move towards the door but stopped when Kurt flinched a little in his direction. It wasn't actual movement, like he'd started to move but then stopped himself. In confusion Blaine looked up, meeting Kurt's gaze for the first time in what seemed like forever.

It took his brain a few seconds to place that look, to recognise it as the same one Kurt had worn that night at the lake. It took him a few seconds to realise that Kurt was stunned by his outburst but not in an angry way. It took him a few seconds to process it all and so he didn't register the kiss until Kurt's mouth was already on his.

And it was nothing like he'd imagined at all.

Kurt's grip on him was firm; one hand on his waist, the other cupping his jaw. His mouth was warm, their lips not quite aligned but that imperfection just made it all the more perfect.

Then, just as Blaine was coming to terms with this, the kiss ended.

"I—" Kurt whispered, not letting go of Blaine as if he didn't dare to. "Blaine, I—"

"I like _you_ ," Blaine whispered to fill the gap. "I don't care about anything else, I really don't. I just… When I think about being with you it's _you_ , Kurt, not _him_. I—" he started but was silenced by another kiss.

This time he was ready for it. When he felt Kurt's lips on his he parted them slightly, feeling Kurt's lower lip slip between them. He gave up thinking about techniques and moves and just let himself feel, let his mouth move against Kurt's in a way that felt right. His hands wound around Kurt's waist, pulling his body in closer just as Kurt's mouth parted a little more and there was that first hesitant sweep of tongue and then—

The sound of the door opening caught them both by surprise and they pulled apart quickly. Blaine wanted to keep some physical contact between them and so his hand ran down Kurt's arm before he hooked a single finger around one of Kurt's.

"He's fine," the woman who'd just entered said and Blaine recognised the voice. Her identity was confirmed when Kurt moved away from him and threw his arms around her. "Little bit of arrhythmia, it's… well, it is serious but not as bad as it could be and I got him here pretty quickly."

"Thank you," Kurt said.

"There's nothing to thank me for," Carole replied. "Come on, he wants to see you."

"I—" Kurt began, turning back towards Blaine. "I'm sorry, I need to—"

"No, go, it's fine," Blaine said and then it was Carole's turn to recognise a voice.

"Thank you for bringing him here," she smiled.

"It's fine, and I'm glad Mr Hummel's going to be OK."

Carole gave a short laugh. "The only time someone gets to call him that without comment is behind his back," she explained.

"All the same, I'm glad he's doing well."

"He'll be out of here by the weekend, I promise," Carole said to Kurt. "Sooner if he promises to do everything I tell him."

Blaine watched the look that passed between them, noticing how obvious it was how much she loved that boy and how mutual it was in return. They were a family – just like Rachel and her dads – and it didn't matter where they came from.

"Come on," Carole said, moving back towards the door.

"I'll catch up," Kurt said, "five seconds?"

Carole looked over to Blaine and smiled. "I'll hold the elevator."

Once they were alone Kurt moved quickly back over to Blaine and kissed him gently. "I'll call you, I promise," he whispered. "There is so much I need to tell you."

"I think I've got the gist of it," Blaine said, stealing a quick second kiss. "I mean, that's if you, if this—"

"Yes, yes, yes," Kurt said, punctuating his words with little kisses. "I mean it, Blaine. Yes, OK? I just… I need to see my dad and sort out a few things but I am getting my phone back from Mercedes and I'll call you as soon as I can."

"OK," Blaine smiled, feeling hope bloom in his chest once more. "Go see your dad."

"OK," Kurt smiled, really smiled, and after a final lingering kiss he was gone and Blaine all but floated out to his car.

*

He didn't hear from Kurt for a week.

This was fine, he told himself that he was probably focussing on his dad's health right now. Cooper reported that Kurt and Mercedes were having a lot of in-depth and heated discussions about things, leading to more than one argument. This had, in turn, led to Kurt not being in the right frame of mind for a scene leading to several takes being required. Most people were putting it down to the fights, Blaine attributed it to stress over his dad and so he wasn't going to add to that by demanding that phone call.

So he waited patiently, said nothing to anyone about their kiss ( _kisses_ ) and tried to get on with his life in the meantime. He went to school, did his homework, rehearsed for Regionals and started to feel pretty good about his life. Until Cooper came home one evening.

"Last day tomorrow," he announced as he pulled off his coat. "Can't believe we're done."

"I thought you had a few more days to go," Blaine asked in confusion.

"We got things back on track, more than that really," Cooper explained. "I have a few scenes left but we are, to all intents and purposes, done. Which is good on the one hand but I found out this afternoon that we're not having a wrap party."

"What? Why not?"

"Because no one's going to be about. Because we're finishing earlier people are picking up extra jobs. Half the camera guys are going to New York, the director's off to Seattle for some TV show—"

"And Kurt?" Blaine asked.

"Finished this afternoon," Cooper said, missing the hope that had been in his brother's voice. "Mercedes had him on a flight back to New York as quickly as possible. He'd be landing, oh, about now," he said checking his watch.

Unable to bear it anymore Blaine raced up the stairs to his room, slamming the door shut behind him and grabbing his cell from the desk. There were no new messages or missed calls so he pulled up Kurt's number and hit dial.

_The number you are calling is no longer in service. Please check and try again. The number you are calling is no longer in service. Please check and—_

Turning to his computer he typed out a quick email and hit send but it was only a few seconds before the reply came.

_Delivery failure. There is no email address at elias.hamilton@—_

It was only then that Blaine allowed himself to cry and he curled up on his bed, clutching a pillow, and refused to move for the rest of the night.


	6. Chapter 6

**The Second Wish**

 

Rachel pulled up outside the garage and killed the engine. Grabbing her purse from the seat next to her she climbed out and walked purposefully up to the entrance when she stopped and tried to remember even the opening line of the speech she'd prepared.

It had seemed such a simple plan; go to the garage where Kurt's father worked, make an impassioned plea on behalf of her friend, and get a new contact number for Kurt.

Not that Blaine had confirmed that the Hummel in _Hummel Tires and Lube_ was indeed the same Hummel, but Rachel Berry was smart, determined and sneaky. Even though Kurt's email address had been deactivated Blaine still had all the messages on his iPhone. So all it had taken was for her to lift it during one glee practice and read through them. Mike had called it an invasion of his privacy and refused to have anything to do with it – until filming had finished and the crew left and Blaine's depression set in.

When Cooper had offered to take his brother to LA for a week she'd encouraged him to go, saying that a change of scenery would do him good. In the end it had taken several people (including Mike, Tina, and even Mr Schue) to convince him but that morning he'd got on a flight and Rachel had seven days to put her plan into action.

"Can I help you?"

"You're Finn," she managed to say once she'd overcome her shock. "Kurt's brother."

"Who?" Finn asked with practiced ease.

"Kurt Hummel."

"My surname's Hudson," he said, "and I don't have a brother."

"Step-brother then," Rachel continued. "Your mom Carole married Kurt's dad a couple of years ago before Kurt transferred to Dalton. After winning them Nationals he was discovered and whisked off to New York where he was presented to the world as a New Yorker and he has kept you and your family a secret because he wants to protect you from the eyes of the media."

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Finn said, turning to go back to the car he'd been working on.

"I was at the music festival," she called out, following him into the workshop. "I was in the car when we picked up Kurt and you scared the life out of my friend Blaine."

"What do you want?" Finn asked, turning back to face her.

"I want Kurt's new number."

"And why would I give it to you, even if I did have it?"

"Because my best friend is in love with him—"

"So's half the country—"

"—and I'm pretty sure Kurt is in love with him too." She stopped when she saw Finn hesitate. "Did he say something to you?"

"I can't talk about it—"

"Please," she begged. "Blaine is depressed and I just want to make it better. I don't know what happened between them but when Kurt left and he deleted his email account and disconnected his cell phone… Even if Kurt doesn't feel the same way about Blaine then he owes him a proper goodbye."

"You have no idea what you're talking about," Finn said. "You're making him out to be… I don't know, some kind of heartbreaker?"

"He is! He's broken Blaine's heart and—"

"And you don't think Kurt's hurting too?" Finn snapped, his voice quiet. "You honestly think it was _Kurt_ who closed that email account? Kurt who changed his cell number?"

"Then who…?" Rachel started before realisation dawned. "Mercedes?"

"I don't know the full story, OK, but from what Mom and Burt were saying, Kurt said something to her and she got mad and put him on the first flight to New York."

"I don't understand—"

"None of us do. All Kurt would say was that he was going to try and work something out?"

"Have you got a number for him?"

"…Yeah," Finn admitted.

"Can I have it? Please?"

"I can't just go giving out his number to anyone who asks, even if they are, well, you," Finn said waving his hand in an all-encompassing gesture over her body.

Rachel couldn't help but smile at this. "Can you call him then? For me?"

"And say what?"

"That Rachel Berry wants to talk to him about Blaine."

"What if he doesn't want to talk to you? What if he doesn't want to talk about Blaine?"

"Did Kurt ever talk about Blaine to you?" she asked. Finn didn't answer but his expression gave him away. "Look, if it is never going to come to anything, if it really is over? Then at least this way Blaine can get some closure. He'll know, for certain, that Kurt's got no interest in him and he can start to get over him. But until then Blaine is just going to keep on being in love with Kurt—"

"You said that you thought Kurt loved him back?"

"You didn't see them together, not properly. And some of the messages he sent Blaine are—"

"You read his messages?" Finn asked, half shocked, half amused.

"I'm an only child, OK? Blaine is the closest thing I'm going to get to having a brother and I love him like one. Now you have a brother, tell me you wouldn't do anything and everything if his happiness was at stake." She stopped for a moment. "I think you would and I think you know that Kurt's happiness _is_ at stake here. He talked to you about Blaine, didn't he? You know that they are… there's something there."

"I still can't give you his number."

"Fine, then go call him now. I'll wait here so I can't even see the number you dial. Tell him that Blaine loves him and misses him and still wants him and if Kurt feels the same way then we can work something out."

"Like what? Mercedes has him locked down pretty tightly."

Rachel just smiled and put her hands on her hips. "She's pretty fierce, but so am I when I get going."

"I can imagine," Finn smiled.

Rachel felt her cheeks colour with heat and she glanced away.

"Wait here, OK?" Finn said before heading into the partitioned office, picking up the phone and starting to dial. After a few minutes he put the handset down and came to the doorway. "He wants to speak to you," Finn called. As Rachel came over he put his hand on her arm gently. "You'd better be right about this. If you make things worse—"

"Trust me," she smiled, putting her hand over his and trying to ignore the quickening of her heartbeat. "I get what I want and I want him to be happy. Both of them."

"Then I guess we're on the same team."

"Welcome to the winning side," she laughed before moving into the office and picking up the handset which was resting on the desk. "Kurt? Hi."

*

Blaine lay back on the grass, looking up at the evening sky above him. The air was warm around him but not heavy, making it a pleasant end to the day.

"Sure about not coming here after graduation?" Cooper's voice interrupted his lack of thoughts. "You'd be able to get into acting, TV or film, with ease."

"I'm sure," Blaine said. "Being part of the movie was fun but—"

"But you're hurt and running scared so you think stage and Broadway are safe."

"Coop—"

"Look, squirt. I am sorry about what happened and I wish he'd let you down gently. But you gotta realise that most celebrities are, well, they're assholes. They only think about themselves and they don't realise the damage they're doing to other people. I thought that when he promised me he'd— I didn't think he'd make it worse for you."

"It's not your fault, Coop," Blaine said, still staring up at the slowly darkening sky. "He knew what he was doing when he kissed me. I guess it was just worry over his dad, he didn't want to be alone or he was worried about not having someone there., I don't know. But he's made his feelings perfectly clear now."

"You tried Twitter?"

"And say what? It'd be public, Coop, and then people would be hounding him because they would want to know who I am and then they'd track me down and maybe find his family… I can't do that to him."

"Why not?" Cooper asked, coming into Blaine's line of sight and casting a shadow across his face.

"Because I love him," Blaine replied, letting his eyes drift shut.

"Ask me, boy's an idiot," Cooper muttered, "and he'd better have the best reason in the world for cutting you off like that."

"What's for dinner?" Blaine asked, changing the subject.

"I thought I'd cook seeing as it's your last night in LA—"

"God, no, I'll do it," Blaine said quickly, jumping to his feet. "This is assuming that your fridge has real food in it."

"I think there's some of last night's take out in there," Cooper smiled as Blaine, suitably distracted, headed back into the house.

*

Rachel found Blaine hiding away in the library. Without a word she sat down next to him, pressing her shoulder against his. "Everyone's asking after you," she said eventually.

"Why? So they can beat me with sticks?"

"No one wants to beat you."

"I screwed up—"

"It wasn't your fault."

"Rachel."

"We don't blame you, OK? None of us do. Well, Puck tried for about thirty seconds but then Tina threatened to post that rehearsal video on YouTube and send the link to the entire school so he's backed down."

"I'm sorry."

"It's fine."

"We should have won."

"There's always next year."

"It was going to be on our NYADA applications. _Show Choir National Champions, 2012_."

"Why is it just your fault, Blaine?"

He shot her a look. "We both know I wasn't up to scratch. I could hear myself, I know I could have done better. I have done better."

"You had a bad day."

"At the worst possible time."

"It could have happened to any of us. We understand."

"Understand?" he asked. "Understand what? That I let what happened to me with Kurt affect me so much that I gave the worst performance of my life at the Nationals competition and as such, once again, New Directions is a joke?"

"We understand that you're still hurting."

"I don't know why I can't get over him," Blaine said quietly, dropping his head to stare at his lap. His hands were clasped tightly together around the strap of his bag and he ran a nail up and down the fabric as he spoke. "It's been nearly a month since he left, a month since I heard anything and I… I just want to be able to move on with my life."

"Well then I have the perfect opportunity," Rachel declared, pulling a piece of paper out from her bag and shoving it into Blaine's lap. "New York."

"What?" Blaine asked, looking at the flight details in front of him.

"My dads have suggested that we go to New York, check out a few potential apartment buildings, get the city under our feet and around us without being distracted by competitions and remind ourselves of what we are working for. Play at being New Yorkers for a weekend."

"I can't just—"

"Yes you can," she interrupted. "You can come with me and what's more you will. The hotel room is already booked, these flights are best for me but obviously I wanted to check with you first. Let me know which ones and we'll get the tickets."

"Rach—"

"And before you go on about cost, they're using their air miles to cover most of the cost so really it's nothing for you to come and you'd be company for me and I know you're going to come so just tell me which of these flights is best by the end of the day and I'll forward you the e-ticket."

"I—I don't know what to say. Thank you I guess."

"Hey, just doing what I promised. Best friend, supporting you, no matter what?"

"Even if I did lose us Nationals?"

"Just promise me that next year you'll help us win and I'll forgive you."

"I promise," he said, laughing as she extended her pinky finger to him. After a short jazz hand he reached out an arm around her. "I also promise to get my head into place and stop thinking about… _him_ all the time."

"Can I ask you something?"

"Since when did you ask first?"

"I was just wondering… If he'd not cut you off, or if there was some explanation—"

"Like what?"

"Like I don't know, but something. Imagine there's a good enough reason why he did what he did. Would it make a difference?"

"Maybe. I'd like to think so but Kurt's done a pretty good job of… leading me on," he settled for. "After the festival and then..."

"What happened between you? You never told me and—"

"Can we change the subject? I'd rather talk about this trip."

"Well good, because I have lots of plans. The hotel we're staying at is on Broadway. Broadway, Blaine! My dads thought that we should be there, because even though it will take us time to get there we are going to be on those stages one day. Maybe even together, how amazing would that be?"

"Pretty amazing," he agreed, letting her rest her head on his shoulders.

"One thing I want to do, and it's non-negotiable, is go for a walk through Central Park during the evening."

"Why would I object to that?" Blaine asked.

"Well, we're flying over Friday afternoon and I thought it would be a good thing to do on our first night there so I wanted to warn you that there will be no lazing about in the hotel room."

"Who goes to New York to spend time in hotel rooms?" Blaine laughed. "After sitting on a plane I think a walk would be great. I'll speak to my parents tonight but—"

"They've already said yes," Rachel said quickly.

"What?"

"My dads called them and mentioned it because they are willing to pay for everything so they wanted to let your parents know that they're OK with it. They're fine if you are and you are fine with this aren't you?" she asked, sitting up to look at him. "You have to come, Blaine."

"I will, I am," he laughed. "Why would I say no?"

"No reason," she said, putting her head back on his shoulder. "So. You coming to glee tonight?"

"I—"

"I promise. No one's mad, we just want to spend some time together before the summer. We only have a few weeks left and—"

"OK, I'll come," Blaine said. "If only to shut you up."

"It is the only way that's going to happen," Rachel said with a soft laugh. "And I promise you. Things are only going to get better from here on in."

*

Friday afternoon saw them waved off at the airport, New York bound once more. For the entire flight Blaine tried to read the in-flight magazine or listen to his New York playlist on his iPod but Rachel was a bundle of nerves next to him and he couldn't work out why. They'd been here a week ago for Nationals (although he was trying very hard not to think about that). They'd taken time to explore the city, stood outside the Gershwin Theatre and dreamt of what it would be like to sing on that stage. New Directions had stood in Times Square together and burst into song about the wonders of New York.

Going back felt in many ways like going home so he just pushed the ear buds in a little further, turned up the volume a little and closed his eyes, trying to ignore Rachel's growing excitement.

*

Rachel graciously allowed Blaine a full ten minutes in their hotel room to drop off his bag and change into something more presentable. Why he needed to change and freshen up was beyond him but he just put it down to her needing them to look the part of New Yorkers while they were here. Once he was acceptable in her view she grabbed his hand and all but pulled him in the direction of the subway.

"Are we late for something?" he asked when he caught her checking her watch for the fifth time.

"No, just checking."

"What?"

"You'll see," she smiled as their train pulled into 72nd Street. Within minutes they were at street level and across the road and into the park. "Nearly there," she declared as they followed the path winding around to their left.

"Nearly where? Rachel, what's going on?"

"Look, I need you to not be mad and I need you to trust me, OK?"

"Trust you about what?" Blaine asked. "What is—" he started but then tailed off when he noticed the barriers and the lights and the cameras. "Rachel—"

"Please just trust me," she said, taking his hand once more and pulling him over to where a security guard was standing. "Hi, we're here to see Finn Hudson? He's expecting us."

"And you are?" the guard asked, glancing down at his clipboard.

"Rachel Berry and Blaine Anderson."

"One moment," he said, turning away slightly to talk into his radio.

"Finn?" Blaine asked. "As in Kurt's brother?"

"Yeah," she said. "We have a plan."

"I don't know if—"

"Come on through," the guard interrupted, moving the barrier a little so they could pass. "Just follow Kirsty here to where the crew are." He gestured to a woman standing nearby and they dutifully fell into step behind her.

Blaine couldn't help but scan the crowds of people, looking for any sign or glimpse of Kurt, but soon they were herded out of sight and towards somewhere a set of chairs were set up.

"Grab a seat, I'll go find Finn," Kirsty said, waving in the direction of the only free chairs – one of which had Kurt's name on the back.

"Please don't hate me." Rachel said, "but we've planned this and I just wanted to give you the chance to talk to him."

"We? You and Kurt?"

"Well, me and Finn mostly, but—"

"What are you doing here?" snapped a voice in interruption. Blaine and Rachel turned to face Mercedes who was currently glaring at them – at Blaine – in a way that made them grateful looks couldn't kill. "Isn't it bad enough that you're ruining Kurt's career, now you're here to screw up his last movie?"

"His last movie?" Blaine asked. "I don't—"

"He quit!" Mercedes all but yelled. "Told me after the Ohio shoot that he was done. The biggest influence that gay teens have in the media today and he's quitting because of you."

"I doubt that—"

"Do you have any idea what you've done? How hard it is to get into this business and Kurt has it handed to him on a silver platter? Now he's going to walk away from all of that, from all his hard work and all the good he's done, and it's because of you."

"Why do you think it's my fault?" Blaine asked. "I never asked him or told him to do anything—"

"Why else would he give up New York and go back to Ohio?" Mercedes asked. "You listen to me kid, you tell him that it's a bad idea for him to go back there. Tell him that he's making a difference to kids everywhere, that he's changing this country. Tell him Ohio has sunk into Lake Erie for all I care. Just get him to stay."

"But that's not what he wants," Blaine said immediately, "or didn't you bother to ask him that? When was the last time you actually spoke to him about what he wanted or have you been so busy telling him what's right for him this whole time?"

"I have done _nothing_ but try to help him be the best that he could be."

"And that's why you pulled him out of his family and dropped him in New York?"

"Because people accepted a gay kid from New York a lot better than they would have one from the Midwest. You don't get how this business works, which you probably should do since Kurt tells me you're interested in it yourself. You need to reinvent yourself sometimes, you need to control what people see and hear about you."

"And that means stopping them from hearing the truth? Did it ever occur to you that Kurt might be sick of the lies? That he just wanted a normal life?"

"What's normal about being bullied for who you are? I don't get why he would go back to that, willingly, when he has it all here—"

"Because he doesn't!" Blaine snapped. "He has nothing here. And if you're talking about him going back to school then you don't know how much he's missed it. He had friends at Dalton, friends who still protect him, even now. I went there once, I met the Warblers, and they didn't even hint that Kurt was once part of their group. They don't need to be told to look out for him, they just do.

"That's what friends do, they look out for each other. We're not just friends, we're family. We're a unit and Kurt doesn't have that. He has no one except co-stars that come and go and a publicist who controls his every move. You can't see beyond what Kurt could do that you're missing what he wants to do."

"He wants to make a difference, I know that," Mercedes retorted. "I know that he wants to make it so that no kid goes through what he did. He talks about bullying and kids being beaten up because they're gay—"

(At that Blaine's heart gave a little staccato beat because Kurt had talked about _him_.)

"—and now he's going to turn his back on that because he wants to graduate high school. Like he wasn't going to do that anyway."

"But it's not the same. Most of his friends are graduating in a few weeks and Kurt should be with them, he should be part of that class. Instead he's here, on another film set, pretending to have the life he wants.

"My brother showed me a few of the pages from that script," he continued, unable to stop himself. "Kurt's character just wanted a normal life and to be like every other kid. The whole movie was about his character finding his place in this world and that's all Kurt is trying to do. He wants to spend his days with friends and going to classes and—"

"Having a boyfriend?" Mercedes cut across. "You know, plenty of guys, fans and non-fans alike, have set Kurt in their sights. What makes you so different?"

"Because that's not why I'm concerned," Blaine snapped back. "First and foremost I am his friend and that's the most important thing here. I just want him to do what's best for him, what makes him happy and no matter what that is, no matter what my thoughts on his choices are? I will support him because that is what friends do. That is what you're supposed to do when you care about someone. You listen and you support and you pick them up when it all goes wrong with tubs of ice cream on hand. You tell them that it's not their fault even if it is and you push them to do things that they really should do but for some reason don't want to.

"Someone who cares about Kurt just wants what's best for him. His dad and step-mom let him move to New York, they agreed to not being a huge and real part of his life because he wanted to protect them. I don't doubt that they would have dealt with it and put up with it but it was Kurt's choice to do that and so they respected and honoured it. And if you can't respect and honour Kurt's choices then you are not only the worst publicist in the business, you have no right to claim that you have Kurt's best interests at heart."

He stopped, if only to catch his breath, but before he could start again a burst of applause came from behind him. Stunned he turned to see an assembled group of people, Rachel and Finn at the front, and as his gaze drifted over them he finally saw him. Kurt was stood off to one side, not clapping with the others, but there was that same soft smile on his face that Blaine had been dreaming of on nights when his denial hadn't prevailed. The same smile that he remembered at random times of the day, the same smile that had first slipped around his heart and refused to let him go no matter what.

Blaine smiled back.

*

Fifteen minutes later Kurt and Blaine were quietly leaving the park, away from the media and the lights of the set. They didn't say anything, Blaine just following Kurt's lead along streets until they came to a small restaurant.

"Best place to eat in the Upper East Side," Kurt said, breaking the silence. "If you're hungry that is?"

In response Blaine's stomach growled, reminding him that it hadn't had anything since lunch. A second after they both laughed and Kurt held open the door for Blaine, requesting a 'private' table for two.

"I'm glad you're here," Kurt said once they were seated and left alone. "I wasn't sure if Rachel was going to convince you to come."

"She did by leaving out the fact that you were here and that we'd— She lied to me," he said with a laugh.

"Oh. Right. I just…" Kurt trailed off, running a finger down the condensation on his water glass. "If you'd known would you have come?"

"…Probably not," Blaine admitted.

"Right. You don't have to… If you want to go then—"

"Do you want me to go?"

"No," Kurt said quickly. "I never… Rachel said I needed to explain and I want to."

"OK."

"And if you want to go after that then I'd understand."

"Just… tell me."

"After that day at the hospital I went to Mercedes, said I wanted to quit. She was, well, you saw what she's like. She blamed it on you, said you'd distracted me and that there was so much left that I wanted to do. And she's right, there are so many things that I want to do. I want to use this position I have, the influence I have, to get more done for equality. I want to be a voice for kids like me, like you, all over this country. I want to show them that hope still exists. I want—" He stopped and looked down, picking at an imaginary spot on the tablecloth. "I want to be me again. Being with you I got to do that. I got to be me and you liked me for that. I got to be with my family, with my dad—"

"Is he OK?" Blaine interrupted.

"Yeah, he's fine. I keep getting emails from him complaining about how Carole is fussing over him but he's fine."

"I just… I was worried."

"Why?" Kurt asked.

"Because you were worried."

Kurt looked up and met Blaine's gaze, his breath catching at the unguarded emotion there. "I want to go back to school. I want to be a normal high school senior and I want to graduate with my friends. I want to actually _show_ kids that education is important and lasts a little bit longer than fame. I wanted to call you but Mercedes confiscated my cell and shut down my email account and I had no way of getting hold of your number.

"Then Rachel tracked down Finn who called me and it was easier to speak to Rachel without Mercedes interfering, just said she was my brother's new girlfriend and that was that."

"I think that part may actually have some truth in it," Blaine smiled, taking a sip of his water for something to do.

"What?"

"Rachel. She has a bit of a crush."

"I think Finn's the same," Kurt said and then they both laughed. "I'm sorry. I couldn't find a way to get in touch with you that wasn't some excuse and I wanted to talk to you properly or see you to explain—"

"So you've explained why you didn't get in touch," Blaine said carefully, "so what about… everything else?"

"What about you?"

"Well… yeah," Blaine admitted with a short laugh.

"I—" Kurt began but was interrupted when their waitress returned to take their order. Blaine faltered having not even looked at the menu but Kurt smoothly ordered a couple of sharing platters and what sounded like a variety of side dishes. "Sorry," he said once she'd gone, "but I'm starving. Been at work since six this morning and there was very little time for a lunch break. It's a little of everything and I should probably have checked that you don't have any allergies or anything—"

"It's fine," Blaine said quickly. "I'm sure there will be something I can eat."

"If not we can order something else. There's a half decent pizza place nearby."

"Isn't just about every pizza place in New York at least half decent?"

"Probably," Kurt laughed and Blaine felt something tighten in his chest.

"Kurt," Blaine said quietly, pulling the mood back down, "I—"

"I meant what I said," Kurt said, "in the hospital. About you and this and us and… everything. I wasn't lying, I wasn't… I meant it. If you did."

"Are—are you sure?"

"About you? Blaine you-- You have no idea what you did to me, do you?" Kurt asked with that soft laugh and Blaine could actually _feel_ himself falling more in love with this guy. "Yes, I'm sure. Yes, this is what I want and I promise that this time I am not going to leave you this time."

"You make it sound so easy but it won't be. Even if you're not doing… this, people aren't just going to forget you. And I know that Dalton's not that far but—"

"Dalton?" Kurt asked.

"Yeah. You talked about graduating with your friends, I just…" Blaine started but stopped when he saw Kurt's face pretty much split in two with his grin. "What?"

"Dalton is over an hour's drive from where my family are. There are other options. Closer options. And the Warblers aren't the only friends I have in Ohio… I hope?" he finished, the note of optimism clear in his voice and finally Blaine allowed himself to believe again.

"Why would you want to go to McKinley?" he asked, trying to get his head around it. "They're hardly the most understanding of people and while it's not all bad I still get at least one slushie thrown at me a month and—"

"I just… I thought that…" Kurt's sentence stalled a few times before he made himself look at Blaine directly. "I want to be where you are. I want to be where my family are and I want to… You, Rachel and Mike, you treated me like someone who was no different to anyone else. And you've got a glee club which I'd love to be a part of because I really have missed that and, perhaps the most important factor of all, you're there."

"Me?" Blaine whispered.

"You. And I thought that it would be great, if you wanted to that is, to maybe see where this thing is going? Because I really like you, Blaine, more than anything or anyone and I know that I've hurt you a lot – Rachel spent a lot of time yelling at me when we first started to talk – and I'd understand if you didn't want to but maybe with time we could—"

Kurt's run on sentence was interrupted by the arrival of food and Blaine was wondering if he would be able to slip her a very generous tip on the condition that she leave them alone until called for. Once the table was laden with food a silence fell as Kurt waited for a response and Blaine tried to work out what that response was going to be.

"I—" Blaine started. He let his eyes drift close and took a deep breath. "I don't know," he admitted. "It's not that I don't want to but you—"

"Whatever it takes to prove to you that I'm serious about this, about you," Kurt pleaded, his hand reaching across the table and resting over Blaine's.

"How about a date?" Blaine suggested, moving his hand a little so his fingers could wrap a little around Kurt's.

"A date?"

"Yeah. A proper date. First date, getting to know you. Seeing if this… us can work."

"OK, I'd like that," Kurt smiled, his fingers starting to stroke gently across Blaine's slightly upturned palm. "So… when?"

"What's wrong with this? Now?"

"Make this our date?"

"Why not?"

"I'd have taken you somewhere else for a start," Kurt laughed.

"I don't care about the where," Blaine said, "it's the company I'm more interested in. That, and the food because I am starving!"

"Me too," Kurt said.

"So."

"So."

"Date?"

Kurt smiled and Blaine fell a little bit more. "Date."


	7. Chapter 7

Blaine had never felt more nervous and apparently neither had Kurt. The conversation stilted and they didn't dare look at each other. They reached for the same piece of garlic bread at the same time, stopped, then both seemed to change their minds.

(Both of them had the same thought that garlic bread on a first date might not be the best idea. But both of them thought that the other wanted it more so they refrained from taking it.)

They fought over the bill and eventually a coin toss decided that Kurt should pay for it but Blaine got the tip. Then, as they got up, both of them waited hesitantly for the other to go first in an act of chivalry before both starting to move at the same time, stopping at the same time, laughing at the same time, starting again at the same time, then tossing that coin again.

Once outside they didn't know where to go; in one direction was Blaine's hotel, in the other was Kurt's apartment and moving in either direction could set the tone for the rest of the evening. So they stood out on the street, across the road from the restaurant, and looked at each other nervously. The little street was quiet, even the passing cars seemed to be a million miles away from where they were.

"I have no idea what I'm doing," Blaine eventually admitted. "I've never been… this is my first proper date."

"In how long?" Kurt asked.

"...Ever?"

"You took a boy to that dance—"

"It wasn't a date," Blaine pointed out. "He was a friend, that's all. I've not… it's just… Just you, OK? This," he said, waving his hands in circles, "is my complete experience when it comes to guys and relationships and everything."

"So I was your first kiss too?" Kurt asked. "Oh god, I was and I pretty much jumped you and I'm so sorry, that is not what your first kiss should have been like!"

"Kurt—"

"I am the worst person for this, I really am. I just… I have these ideas in my head about how things should go and they're all just corny and romantic and I know that's silly but—"

"It's not silly," Blaine said, summoning up his courage and pushing forward.

The kiss was off-target but they adjusted quickly, standing on a New York street with their arms wrapped around each other which made it easier to fall into a hug when they were done.

"I can't stop shaking," Blaine laughed as he felt his body thrum.

"Me either," Kurt whispered. "And for the record? This is pretty new to me too."

"But I read—" Blaine started, pulling back a little to look at Kurt before he was silenced with another kiss.

"Don't believe everything you read," Kurt said when they parted. "Only a tiny fraction of what they wrote was even close to the truth. It's just… being in the public eye and trying to.. fumble my way through relationships? It's hard."

"So what does that mean for us? You can't exactly just disappear, Kurt."

"It's got to be your decision," Kurt said firmly. "If you don't want to have to deal with it then I'll make sure we're not together anywhere we can be spotted. It is doable, celebrities do it all the time."

"But what if I don't want to hide?" Blaine whispered, nuzzling his way along Kurt's cheek so he could whisper in his ear. "What if I want to tell the world that I'm with you?"

"Then you'd need to understand how big a deal that is," Kurt whispered back. "Because once you're in the public eye everything becomes about twenty times bigger and it's hard to have a private life."

"Do I need to decide now?" Blaine asked.

"Of course not," Kurt laughed, his hold on Blaine tightening a little. "The only decision we need to make is where to from here."

The equivocation of Kurt's statement wasn't lost on Blaine and, summoning up his courage once more, he pulled back and looked at him. "I want to go to your apartment."

Kurt swallowed thickly and nodded. "OK."

*

Kurt hailed a cab, unwilling to share Blaine on the subway or a walk. They sat as close as they could, hands clasped between them and fingers starting to trace lines and patterns on the other's skin. Once there the driver was paid and Kurt led Blaine through the entrance to his apartment block to the elevator.

As soon as the doors slid shut behind them Kurt pulled Blaine in close, mouths meeting in a gentle kiss.

"You know this is somewhat surreal for me, right?" Blaine laughed as Kurt's hands ran down his arms. "I mean, after everything..."

"I know," Kurt smiled. "It's a bit weird for me too, I mean… well, I'd hoped that I'd be able to talk to you tonight, explain everything and maybe we'd start to be OK, but this? I didn't plan this, OK? This wasn't some grand plan I had."

"You mean seducing fans and taking them away to your apartment isn't something you do on a regular basis?" Blaine teased.

"Of course it isn't."

"I bet you say that to all the guys."

"Of course it is," Kurt laughed, kissing him again. The elevator slowed as it reached their floor and by the time the doors slid open Kurt had grabbed Blaine's hand again. "Come on."

*

After texting Rachel that he wasn't going to be back any time soon (to which he got a reply ALL IN CAPS LOCK TO EXPRESS HER EXCITEMENT AND HAPPINESS FOR HIM) Kurt made them a couple of drinks and they sat, either end of the couch, and – nothing.

"Why is this so hard?" Kurt sighed after a couple of minutes of the awkward silence. "I— I don't know why this is—"

"I know," Blaine laughed. "I just don't know what I'm supposed to do here, what we're – does that even make sense?"

"…A little," Kurt said.

"I don't want to screw this up."

"Me either."

"So that's one thing we agree on, next issue?" Kurt laughed.

"What are we?" Blaine asked bluntly. "I mean, at the risk of sounding like a teenage girl, are we--?"

"Boyfriends?" Kurt asked, raising an eyebrow.

"That. Everything else that goes with it. I mean, you can't exactly do casual—"

"You think I could be casual about this? Us?"

"No, what I mean is that we… this is…" Blaine sighed. "I—"

"Your brother told me something," Kurt interrupted. "He said that you're the kind of person who will give his all to something and that you needed someone who would give their all in return. He said that it didn't have to be all right at the start but that we needed to be heading in that direction.

"So here's where I stand, Blaine. I want that. Everything. This is all really new to me and I know it is for you too so we're going to have to figure out a lot of this but… But I want to get there. One day. With you."

"That's… a lot of information," Blaine said with a half laugh. "And pretty serious stuff too."

"I'm not proposing marriage and kids and a shared condo just yet," Kurt said quickly, "but… maybe? One day? I don't know. I'd like to see if that's a possibility."

"A possibility for us?"

"...Yeah."

Blaine couldn't stop himself from smiling. "I'd like that too."

"How long can you stay?" Kurt asked quietly, hesitantly.

"My flight home is tomorrow evening."

"I meant—"

"I know what you meant. I mean, I have no plans. Well, the ones I thought we had seemed to be a bit of a ruse and if you're free tomorrow—"

"I'm free."

"Then why not?" Blaine asked. "If you want—"

"Yeah."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

*

They caught the end of a Harry Potter movie on TV, had a go at karaoke on the Wii, drank and ate and talked until Blaine happened to glance over at the wall clock.

"Oh hell," he muttered, reaching for his cell phone.

"What?" Kurt asked until he noticed the time too. "I didn't realise how late it was."

"I think this is officially classed as early actually," Blaine laughed as he pulled up his messages. "Well, Rachel's not worrying about me so I guess that's something."

"Do you want to go back? I can get a cab—"

"I—" Blaine looked up, torn between what he should say and what he needed to say.

"Because," Kurt said carefully, "you don't have to. If you wanted to stay… I mean, the couch is pretty decent if you wanted but you don't, I mean, I don't expect you to—"

"Kurt," Blaine said firmly, leaning forward so he could start to crawl to the other end of the couch. "I would love to stay."

"Really?" Kurt whispered as Blaine's face was just in front of his.

"Really," Blaine whispered, kissing him gently. "And," he continued, finding his voice despite his nerves, "I think we've spent enough time on this couch."

"Too much," Kurt said before his hand slipped around the back of Blaine's neck, pulling him down into a kiss which meant they spent a little longer on the couch in any case.

*

Morning came quietly, slipping through the uncovered windows and making its way along the corridor to the bedroom where its two occupants were still unaware of its presence. Light flooded under the door, bringing with it the promise of city summer warmth. Under the sheets Blaine stirred, turning over and stretching out a little. As his eyes opened he took the simple décor of Kurt's room, noting the subtle differences between this and what (little) he'd observed the previous night.

Memories of kisses and careful touches (a discussion of a line and boundaries and taking their time) and falling asleep curled up around each other and being so perfectly happy brought themselves to the forefront of his mind.

He turned back over, planning to face Kurt and curl up once more when certain parts of his body made themselves known to him.

His face suddenly flushed in embarrassment and he willed to any deity which may be listening to just let Kurt sleep a little bit longer, please don't let him—

"Morning," Kurt's voice came from beside him, heavy with sleep and affection.

Could he pretend to still be asleep? Could he—

"You OK?" Kurt asked and Blaine realised that with his eyes open he was clearly awake and he'd not answered Kurt and what if he was giving the impression that he regretted last night when nothing could be further from the truth and his body was evident of not only that but the fact that he was a teenager, a gay teenager in bed with someone he loved and—

"Fine," he managed to say. "Just... thinking."

"About me I hope," Kurt hummed sleepily. "Or good thoughts at least."

"Very good and of course about you," Blaine said, trying to conjure up the least seductive and unsexy thoughts that he could muster. "Still can't believe that I'm here, that this is happening."

"You're going to have lots of time to get used to it," Kurt said, thankfully still not moving from his side of the bed. "When I'm in Ohio we can… well," he trailed off, leaving it unsaid.

"At your parents' house?" Blaine laughed and that idea started to have the desired effect so he focused on that. "Isn't Finn still at home?"

"He's off to college in the Fall. He was in line for a scholarship at Ohio State but he missed out. But it's fine, I can cover the tuition. He complained, a lot, but it makes sense."

"But your parents will still be there and I'm sorry but… not with them in the house!" Blaine laughed.

"It'll be my house too," Kurt pointed out.

"For which I sure there will be rules."

"I'm hardly your average eighteen year old," Kurt said, his voice a little more sure as he woke up. "I could get my own place if I wanted."

"And do you want to?" Blaine asked, his mind flooding with images of more nights like this, just the two of them in their private space.

"I want to go home," Kurt replied, scattering Blaine's dreams and bringing back the uncomfortable image of Mr and Mrs Hummel not giving them a second of privacy. "I want to go to school and I want to be with you."

Blaine took a deep breath as he got his body under control and felt comfortable enough to roll over to face him. "That's fine with me. For the record."

"Good," Kurt replied but he didn't move in turn.

"You OK?"

"Fine, just... enjoying being here."

"Well, I need coffee. I assume you have some?"

"Kitchen."

"I wasn't expecting it to be in the laundry room."

"Would be an interesting way of making cappuccinos," Kurt quipped.

"Well, you just lie there, I'll go make some," Blaine said, sitting up enough so he could lean over and kiss Kurt gently before getting up.

Kurt watched him go, Blaine's boxer briefs fitting perfectly against his waist, across the curve of his ass cheeks, and he realised he was going to need a few more minutes before he could get up.

*

"So things have been... a little busy," Burt said as he turned the car into their street.

"What do you mean?" Kurt asked, his fingers fidgeting with the edge of his seatbelt. Since being picked up from the airport (and avoiding the press waiting for them there) all he wanted to do was go home, change, and go see Blaine.

"I mean this lot," Burt said as their house came into view.

Not that Kurt could have missed it, what with the gaggle of press outside with cameras of all varieties.

"You are kidding me," Kurt breathed as his dad pulled up onto the driveway.

"Nope. Been here all day."

"I don't know what they expect me to say, we covered it all in New York," Kurt sighed.

When he'd announced that he was taking a break from movies to finish his education he had, despite Mercedes' doubts, told the whole story about his background. It had, on the whole, gone down pretty well with his fans as they understood why he had protected his family and why he was going back to Ohio for school. Those that hadn't were a minority and Kurt was doing everything he could to avoid making the situation worse.

Everything had been going well until the final day of shooting when an extra had overheard Kurt on the phone to Blaine (not that he knew who it was) and immediately leaked to the press that Kurt Hummel had a boyfriend. Now every gossip and media publication wanted to know who the mystery man was. They had worked out that he was likely to be in Ohio but they were still looking at his previous school of Dalton and no one there was even giving them a 'no comment'.

"Dad…" Kurt said, turning to face his father with utter disappointment on his face. There was no way he could leave and go see Blaine with a small press corp camped outside his house. The second he left he would be followed and then Blaine would be forced into the media spotlight before he was ready.

"Let's just get you inside, kid," Burt said, getting out of the car and trying to ignore the flashes from the cameras. He grabbed one of Kurt's bags and, keeping his head down, headed for the door. Kurt followed after grabbing the second bag, ignoring reporters who wanted to know how it felt being home; if he had anything to say about his 'betrayal' of his fans; if he was going to see his boyfriend tonight.

 _No, thanks to you idiots_ , Kurt thought bitterly as he stepped inside the house and closed the door on the assembled press.

"Welcome home," Burt said, his voice and smile warm and Kurt found himself pulled into a hug. "You were missed."

"I missed you guys too," Kurt said into his dad's shoulder. "And I am glad to be home but—"

"Come on," Burt cut across, stepping back and turning in the direction of the kitchen. "Carole's been bakin' all day and I want to know what you're goin' to let me eat before I drive myself crazy with temptation."

Leaving his bags dumped unceremoniously in the hallway, Kurt followed his dad, hand already closing around his cell phone. He didn't know what he was going to say to Blaine and so a few minutes of family time, of maybe a slice of one of Carole's cakes, would be enough time to come up with something more than 'I'm so sorry'.

"Just in time, sweetheart," Carole said as Kurt appeared in the doorway. "The walnut cake is just about done so you can be our taste tester."

"It smells fine to me," Burt said. "And if it tastes half as good as it smells then it'll be great."

"Well I followed his recipe and he was watching me like a hawk during the whole thing," she said, kissing him gently in hello, "so it should be at least edible."

"It'll be more than that," Blaine laughed, finishing off drying his hands and turning to face Kurt. "I am so glad you're here, Carole's had me working all day and I could use a break."

Blaine couldn't help but laugh at the expression on Kurt's face but it faded away when Kurt almost _ran_ across the room and flung his arms around Blaine.

"You're here," he whispered. "I don't—"

"Your dad and I figured it'd be pretty mad out there tonight when you came home," Blaine said, "so I came over last night to beat them. I wanted to be here—"

"And we wanted him here," Burt interrupted. "I know you've been goin' on about your education but I also know this boy here has a lot to do with your decision and I think it's only right I get to know my son's boyfriend."

"Hey, come help me set the table for dinner," Carole said, putting a hand on Burt's back and pushing him gently out of the kitchen. Still wrapped around Kurt Blaine couldn't help but laugh because he knew as well as she did that the table was fully laid for dinner.

"I thought I wasn't going to get to see you," Kurt said, pulling back enough to be able to look at Blaine. "I thought—"

"I wasn't going to miss this for anything," Blaine whispered, leaning forward and capturing Kurt's mouth in a kiss.

Since their too-short time in New York they had managed one other weekend together. As soon as school had finished for the summer but before Kurt made his big announcement, Blaine had flown out to join Kurt. They'd barely left the apartment but they didn't need to, spending their time talking and kissing and being together. During this time they'd come up with a plan; Blaine wouldn't be hidden from the media but they weren't going to do some big 'coming out' announcement either. When Kurt started school in the Fall they would just be together – or as together as they could be in public in Ohio.

No announcement, no press release, just them. Kurt was going to be an ordinary kid at an ordinary high school and so he would have an ordinary life with his ordinary boyfriend. (Kurt had disagreed with that last adjective, Blaine had disagreed with him and discovered that his boyfriend did not play fair when it came to pillow fights. But the kissing and sleepy cuddles afterwards made up for it.)

"I can't believe you stayed over last night," Kurt laughed softly, resting his forehead against Blaine's. "I can't believe my dad agreed to it!"

"It was his idea actually," Blaine said. "He knew you'd want to see me and I think this way he still gets to have his family dinner. Is the Friday night thing normal or is he doing that for my benefit?"

"What?"

"I have a standing dinner invitation for each Friday night and I don't know what to make of it."

"It's normal, don't worry. How did you get Dad to like you so much?" Kurt laughed.

"I got you home," Blaine whispered, kissing him gently. "Worth sleeping on the couch tonight for."

"The couch?"

"Well I don't think he's going to let me sleep in your bed tonight..."

"You were in it last night?" Kurt asked, his brain slowly processing the idea of Blaine, in his bed, of it happening again and again, of it being the two of them and—

"You OK?" Blaine asked and almost squealed in surprise as Kurt's hand was firm on the back of his neck, pulling him in for a hard kiss. "Kurt, your parents are in the next room."

"You can't talk... about you in my bed... and not..."

"Plenty of time for that," Blaine said quietly, gently stopping Kurt's mouth from making its way down his neck. "We have a whole year ahead of us."

"And I get to spend every minute of every day with you," Kurt smiled.

"Come on, we should serve this cake. It's best when it's still warm and I think your dad may actually kick me out in front of the press if he doesn't get a slice."

"A small one," Kurt said as they reluctantly parted.

"It's pretty heart healthy, I made sure of it."

"Really? You did that?"

Blaine gave a small half-shrug as he eased the cake from its tin. "Figured it wouldn't be the best way to keep seeing you, killing your father so early on in this relationship."

"Relationship," Kurt repeated slowly and it made Blaine pause for a second. "We're in a relationship."

"...Yeah?" he said hesitantly.

"Nothing," Kurt smiled and shook his head gently.

As the smell of still-warm and freshly-baked cake filled the kitchen Kurt couldn't help but steal quick glances at Blaine. Now, more than ever, he knew he was going to love this boy.

*

After dinner (during which Finn seemed to be undeterred by their guest and finished everything in sight) they played board games, watched a movie, talked and laughed and never once made Blaine feel like he wasn't part of the family. As it got later and later Finn headed off for his online gaming session ("There's this guy I've been playing with for months, calls himself Puck, thinks he can beat me. I gotta prove him wrong," he declared, prompting a shared look and laugh between Kurt and Blaine.) and eventually Burt and Carole called it a night too, but not before pointedly getting out the spare bedding and putting it at the other end of the couch.

"I get it, Dad," Kurt said as he hugged his father goodnight. "Blaine stays down here."

"You got it," Burt replied. "We'll see you boys in the morning."

Once they were alone Blaine was surprised to watch Kurt pull out one of the lighter blankets and drape it over them.

"What?" Kurt asked when he noticed the look on Blaine's face. "He said _you_ have to stay down here. He never said I couldn't."

"Kurt—"

"Unless you want me to go?"

"Now that's not fair," Blaine protested. "But this is your dad's house and he makes the rules and—"

"I'm eighteen and I've lived my own life in New York. I had my own apartment—"

"Which you sold."

"—and I shared a bed with my boyfriend in said apartment. I'm not a little kid anymore, Blaine, he can't expect me to act like one."

"No, but he can expect you to follow the rules."

"Relax, I'm not about to jump you or anything. I just... I don't want to leave just yet."

"I don't want you to go just yet," Blaine replied, feeling a little reassured that Kurt wasn't about to try and circumnavigate all of Burt's house rules. "But you can't stay down here."

"Fine, just one more movie then," Kurt replied, settling back against the couch and indicating that Blaine should curl up with him. "I've been sharing you with my family all evening and I just want some us time."

"That'd be great," Blaine smiled.

*

Blaine's first thought that he should get a new alarm clock because his was definitely broken. Instead of a beeping noise it was sounding more like someone – was coughing.

Startled as his brain kicked in he almost threw Kurt from the couch but succeeded in waking him up.

"Breakfast is ready," Burt said as he walked away from them, the _we are gonna talk about this_ remaining quiet.

"You fell asleep," Blaine hissed as they hurriedly righted themselves and checked that they looked presentable.

"So did you!"

"I was comfy!"

"So was I!"

"Your dad is going to kill me. He's going to kill me and ban me from the house and I'll never see you again."

"You're overreacting—"

"I got to stay on condition that I stayed on the couch."

"You did stay on the couch."

"We both know he didn't intend for you to stay with me!"

"Blaine, I'm—"

"Eighteen and an adult and have shared a bed with your boyfriend in your apartment in New York, yeah, I know. But this isn't that life anymore, Kurt."

"Let's just go talk to him, OK?" Kurt said, offering his hand to Blaine. "Trust me, he's pretty easy-going."

"So easy going that he's OK with us sleeping together?"

"He doesn't care that I'm gay if that's what you mean. He's happy if I'm happy and I'm happy."

"There's a difference between wanting your kid to be happy and letting them... bunk up with their boyfriend. Oh god, what if he thinks we...?"

"Then I'll correct him."

"Oh god, that's worse," Blaine moaned, covering his face with his hands. "I should just go—"

"And if the press are still here?"

"They wouldn't have camped out _all_ night would they?"

"You want to risk finding out because you're too embarrassed to face my dad?"

"...Yes," Blaine decided on.

"Come on," Kurt laughed, grabbing Blaine's hand anyway. "Trust me, it won't be that bad."

He led Blaine through to the kitchen where Carole was trying to prevent Finn from eating all the pancakes.

"Dad—" he began.

"Clarification of rules," Burt interrupted. "When Blaine stays over; couch," he said pointing to Blaine, "bedroom," he finished pointing to Kurt.

"In New York—"

"This 'ain't New York, kid, this is my house and these are my rules. Most parents wouldn't even let their kids' boyfriend or girlfriend stay over, I'm meeting you halfway. If you're not happy then I'll impose a nine pm curfew for school nights, ten for weekends and holidays and you can spend the last ten minutes of those saying goodnight on the doorstep like most other kids your age."

"I'd take the deal if I were you, love," Carole said as she moved the plate of pancakes away from Finn's grasping hands.

"We just fell asleep watching a movie, I promise we didn't mean to—" Blaine started but fell silent when Burt turned to look at him. "I'm sorry, I can go—"

"Are you under some impression that I'm about to kick you out because you fell asleep on my couch?" Burt laughed. Instead of putting Blaine at ease he actually felt a little more nervous. "Look, I'm not daft. I was young once believe it or not and I… Just be respectful OK? And follow the house rules. Couch, bedroom," he repeated, gesturing to Blaine then Kurt in turn, "for all parentally authorised sleepovers. Got it?"

"Yes, Dad."

"Yes, Mr Hummel."

"Burt," he corrected to Blaine. "Now eat before Finn gets through them all."

Kurt instinctively reached for Blaine's hand but he seemed to ignore it, moving out of the way as he took a seat at the kitchen table. Saying nothing, Kurt slipped into the seat next to him as Carole served them both with a couple of small stacks to "get them started".

Not that Kurt felt particularly hungry anymore.

*

As they pulled out outside Blaine's house Kurt turned off the engine and sat there for a moment until Blaine tentatively said, "Do you want to come in?"

"Are you sure about this?" Kurt asked.

"Well, I don't know if my parents are in but they've said they want to meet you soon so—"

"I meant us, Blaine."

"What?"

"Are you sure about us?"

"Where's this come from?" he asked. "You know I am, you... Is this because of this morning?"

"That's supposed to be my home, Blaine, and I should be free to do what I want there. Instead you and Dad—"

"Now hold on a second," Blaine said. "Your dad gave us a lot of freedom last night, freedom he's planning to keep giving us. And you're complaining because, what? You don't get to share a bed with me?"

"I just wanted—"

"You know he thinks we're sleeping together already?" Blaine said. "Before we left, when I went back for my sweater, I heard him and Carole talking. They think—"

"What business is it of theirs?" Kurt asked. "If they—"

"You don't get it, do you, Kurt?" Blaine snapped. "It _matters_. It matters because they're your parents and that's your home and I want to be able to come over and study in your room without them thinking that we're... y'know, and I want to be able to look your dad in the eye and neither one of us be embarrassed and I want you to know that this is what real family life is like. Rules and restrictions and having to give your parents some deniability to work with because even though we're not... y'know, I don't want them thinking that if they come home and we've been the house together that we've been doing stuff, or when you come over here we're—"

"Fine, I get it," Kurt interrupted. "But it's my life and what I do with my boyfriend isn't any of their concern."

"No, but it is mine," Blaine pointed out, "and I happen to agree with your dad. Maybe the curfew idea wasn't such a bad one after all. That, or I just don't come over."

"So what? I only see you at school? The library maybe? When we go for coffee or to see a movie?"

"Until you see how important this is? Yeah, I guess so," Blaine said, getting out of the car and slamming the door shut behind him. He'd not even got up to the front door before Kurt had pulled away and so when he reached it he just put his head against it and sighed.

*

"Mom sent cookies," Finn said, holding out the plate with a longing look. "She also thinks you might want to talk to me. Are you mad at them for some reason?"

"No," Kurt said, taking the plate and putting it down on the bed next to him. When he saw Finn's gaze follow them he picked up the plate and offered it to Finn. "I'm mad at Blaine. Or me. I can't quite work it out."

"Thanks," Finn said thankfully as he grabbed one. "And why would you be mad at Blaine? He's awesome."

"You really think so?"

"Yeah. He's been over a few times after you told Burt about him."

"Really?"

"Yeah. He came into the shop to formally introduce himself after you'd called and told us. I don't know, it was pretty weird and funny but Burt seemed to like him for it. Said stuff about respect an' all that. Turns out that boyfriend of yours knows a couple of things about cars too and so they got talking and then he came over for dinner.

"I don't know if I'm supposed to approve of my brother's boyfriend or not but it's hard not to. He seems to want to make everyone happy which is something given he's friends with Rachel and—"

"Rachel?" Kurt asked.

"Yeah, she and I..." Finn started but then stopped. "Mom doesn't know. Not yet."

"Why not?"

"Because you coming home is sort of a big deal and this thing with Blaine is really sensitive and I'm not gate-crashing that."

"Why would it be sensitive?" Kurt asked.

"Dude, you know no one in this house cares who you love, but out there they care a whole lot. And from what Rachel says about McKinley they might have a couple of things to say about it too. So you get this space," he said, gesturing around him.

"How do you know all this?"

"They spoke to me," Finn said quietly, taking a bite from the cookie. "They wanted to talk me through what they decided because it's a bit of a double sandwich. I think."

"Standard?"

"Yeah, that. Like I couldn't have sleepovers with Rachel if I wanted, even if she was on the couch. But you've been off doing your own thing in New York in your own apartment and so bringing guys home—"

"I _never_ brought guys home!" Kurt spluttered.

"—whatever, you could do it. And I think they want to make sure that you get a bit of that, keep you happy?"

"Why would they want to 'keep me happy'?" Kurt asked.

"You have like, millions in the bank. You could buy a house if you wanted to but instead you're back in the same room you had when you went to Dalton. And you're not at Dalton which means you're gonna be around more and that means a lot to them. Burt's been getting better in leaps and bounds since you told him you wanted to come home and it's like we're a family again. A family that includes Blaine now, I guess.

"What I'm sayin' is that they know you're not a kid but you're still their kid. Even Mom's I guess, even though she's not... y'know."

"I know," Kurt said quietly.

"And Blaine's awesome. He helps out and he's like you in some ways. I don't mean the gay thing, although that is the same obviously, I mean he knows about cars and football and baking and fashion. You know he keeps calling them 'Mr and Mrs Hummel'? It's weird. Like he's some Stepford Wife."

"You don't know about double standards but you do know about Stepford Wives?" Kurt asked.

"Some of those girls were hot!" Finn grinned. "Nicole Kidman is gorgeous."

Kurt laughed and shook his head before grabbing his own cookie and breaking a bit off. "Blaine's just... He had a go at me because I got mad at him."

"Why?"

"Because he said that if I can't respect Dad and Carole's rules he won't come over."

"OK. And?"

"And that's it."

"That's it? You're my brother and I love you and I'm not just sayin' that 'cause you helped me get into college, but I'm on Blaine's side here. I think Burt's still trying to get his head around the fact that you're not a little kid anymore."

"He knew Blaine was staying with me in New York, he—"

"Was able to tell himself that nothing happened—"

"Nothing _did_ happen!" Kurt yelled and the buried his face in his hands, muttering something.

"What?"

Kurt lifted his head a little. "I said that I've never… at all."

It took Finn a moment before he blushed and looked down at his hands, dismayed to find them empty so he grabbed another cookie from the plate to distract himself. "Right."

"Blaine's the first boyfriend I've ever had and I just want to spend every second I can with him, is that so bad? To want to be with the person you love?"

Finn nearly choked on his mouthful. "You love him?" he asked around his food. "Dude, that's awesome!"

"Mouth!" Kurt protested as Finn spat out crumbs onto the carpet. "Yeah, I love him."

"He love you too?"

"I don't know."

"How do you not know? Did he not say it back? Was it awkward? Is that the real reason you guys fought?"

"I haven't said it," Kurt admitted.

"...Did you tell me before you told him?" Finn asked. "That's... weird."

"I didn't mean to tell you!"

"I won't say anything, I promise."

"Not even to Rachel?"

"Not even to Rachel," Finn said, putting his hand to his chest before realising that he'd just squashed the cookie against his shirt. "But you should totally tell Blaine."

"I will, when the time is right."

"What's wrong with now?"

"We're fighting, Finn. I am not having… that happen during a fight."

"Right. So stop fighting and then tell him."

"And how do you suggest that I do that?"

Finn shrugged. "Rachel says that sorry is the best place for me to start so you can try that?"

Kurt picked off another bit of his cookie before putting the rest of it back on the plate. "I don't want him on the couch, Finn. I keep thinking about—"

"Too much information!" Finn protested. "Look, while Mom and Burt and I are in the house you need to just... be good. But we're not always home and when I'm at college I'll be away and I swear if you use my bed I'll—"

"I don't want to freak him out, Finn," Kurt laughed. "But point taken." He chewed slowly on the bite of cookie he had in his hand. "We shouldn't be fighting like this, Finn. Not this early on."

"You've been back less than a day and you had to dodge the press just to get into your house then I had to distract them so you could take Blaine home this morning and it's a lot. Think they were a bit mad when they realised you'd gone – hopefully they won't be back anytime soon. But with all that going on, you two fighting isn't really that big a surprise. Just go fix it, OK? We kinda like Blaine."

"I kinda like him too," Kurt said. "And thank you. Just… not a word of this to Dad or Carole, right?"

"Trust me, I'm going to try and forget that we talked about most of this."

"Will the rest of the cookies help you forget?"

"I think they might," Finn grinned, grabbing the plate as Kurt grabbed his phone from the nightstand. "Where are you going?"

"To apologise," he said.

*

He stopped off to pick up a couple of coffees which he balanced in one hand while knocking on Blaine's front door with the other. He'd managed to make the second trip without being followed – maybe small town living with its handful of journalists had its perks he decided – and wondered what he'd say if one of Blaine's parents answered the door.

In the end it was Blaine who pulled it back, perfectly casual in a pair of cut-off jeans and a form-fitting sweater.

"Peace offering," Kurt said, holding up the small carrier with two coffees in. "And an apology. You were right, I shouldn't have... You were right."

"You want to come in?" Blaine asked.

"If you want me to."

"We fought, Kurt, it's not like we broke up. Is it?" Blaine stepped back to let Kurt come in, taking the coffees from him as he did so and setting them down on the side table.

"Do you want to break up?"

"Do you?" When Blaine looked up at Kurt he got his answer and reached out, pulling him into a hug. "I'm sorry, I just—"

"It was my fault—"

"—don't want to screw this up—"

"—so hard to live by someone else's rules—"

"—do want to be with you—"

"—so right when you're with me—"

"—don't want to rush this—"

"—don't leave me, please," Kurt whispered, bringing an end to their exchanges.

"Never. Been dreaming of this for a really long time," Blaine joked, squeezing Kurt a little tighter.

"And I don't want to rush this either. You were right, Blaine, we have time. And I'm sorry if I made you feel like I was rushing you into something you weren't ready for."

"I don't want you to feel like I'm leading you on or—" Blaine started but Kurt pulled back and pressed his fingers to Blaine's mouth to shut him up.

"You're not, I promise. Curling up with you last night, even if we did fall asleep and upset my dad a little? It was perfect. I'd do that every night if I could. So. Are we done fighting? Because I'd really like to kiss you now."

Blaine nodded and when Kurt pulled his hand back his mouth widened into a grin. "My parents are out by the way."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"What are you suggesting, Blaine Anderson?" Kurt grinned.

Blaine's eyes flickered in the direction of the stairs, just briefly.

"Am I going to find my posters on the walls? Shelves stacked with magazines and my DVDs?" When Blaine flushed in embarrassment Kurt couldn't help but laughed and kissed him gently. "I'm sorry, I was just... failing to lighten the mood I guess."

"I took everything down, threw most stuff out actually."

"Oh."

"It was after..."

"It's OK," Kurt whispered, his hands closing around Blaine's. "I understand."

"Anyway," Blaine started as he dropped one of Kurt's hands and led him in the direction of the stairs, "I'd much rather have photos up on my walls. Real people."

"I think we can manage that. But later, yeah?"

"Later," Blaine agreed.


	8. Chapter 8

The music of the party dulled a little when he closed the door behind him and despite the low levels of light afforded to him from the house, Blaine was able to easily spot him. He gave a soft laugh as he walked up to the sun lounger. "I hear those things are better during daylight hours."

"This is quieter," Kurt replied, not even bothering to open his eyes. "And better for my sanity."

Blaine sat down on the end and rested a hand on Kurt's leg. "I am so sorry."

"They mean well."

"I'll talk to them. Well, I'll talk to Santana."

"Why just her?"

"Because she's the one who's going to scare you off," Blaine laughed. His fingers drew lines across Kurt's jeans for a moment before he pulled his hand back. "I... I have something I want to say."

At this Kurt opened his eyes and shuffled up the lounger so he was sitting up.

"The other day, when you came over and used my computer? You left yourself logged into your Facebook account."

"Did you change my profile picture to something weird?" Kurt asked, his eyes narrowing playfully.

"No, I—"

"Tell me you didn't change any settings," Kurt said quickly, losing his joking tone. "That's the only private account I have—"

"I messaged a couple of your friends. From Dalton."

"That's it?" Kurt asked.

"They told me a bit about the school, about how things are there, the set-up and stuff, and I just... I know that it would be better for you, publicity wise, if you—"

"Went to Dalton?" Kurt finished. "Blaine..." He sat up fully so he could reach out and take Blaine's hands. "Listen to me, OK? If I wanted to be sheltered and hidden away from the press and everyone then I would go there. If I wanted to be surrounded by two-stepping boys in blazers then that's where I'd be next week. But what I want?" he said, giving Blaine's hands a gentle squeeze. "Is this. Is you, public school, a normal life like most kids out there. I even want to get to know that lot better!" he said, gesturing towards the house.

"Why would you want to get to know them better?" Blaine laughed. "They're my friends, I know, but... really? Even Rachel?"

"Even Rachel. They're OK, really."

"Says the guy who lasted less than an hour at a Rachel Berry Party Experience before running out to find peace on the sun loungers in the middle of the night."

"Says the guy who knew his boyfriend would come and find him and we'd be able to do this without a running commentary," Kurt replied, reaching out to grab hold of Blaine's body and pull him down so they were both laid down. They lay there, side by side, half curled into each other, half staring up at the sky. "I mean it. McKinley is closer to home so I get to spend more time with my family. I get to see you and I get to be a normal kid, one not hidden away at an expensive private school."

"You worried about what's going to happen? Next week, I mean. Do you think the press will be there?"

"Probably."

"We should probably arrive separately then—"

"If you want," Kurt hummed. "I know what we said about keeping things private but... if you wanted..."

For a moment they lay there in silence, the idea hanging between them.

"OK," Blaine said eventually.

"You're sure?" Kurt asked, before feeling Blaine give the best version of a shrug he could when he was curled up next to him. "I should probably talk to my publicist then, get something in place. I don't think you need one yet, but if things get... involved, then maybe?"

"OK," Blaine said, his voice suddenly quiet.

"I'm sorry that this is... I didn't want you caught up in this."

"It's fine," Blaine said, his voice a little more certain. "Really. I knew what I was getting into, I know what I'm getting into. And if that means I need a publicist then..." He sighed and buried his head into the crook of Kurt's shoulder. "I never thought this would be my life."

"I'm—"

"Don't apologise," Blaine whispered, kissing Kurt's neck. "I get you, I get this, I..." He pulled back to look at Kurt. "I get to be the happiest I've been in, well, ever."

"Me too," Kurt smiled. "So no more talk about me going to Dalton?"

"OK."

"And now onto more important matters. Outfits for next week."

"What?"

"Because if you and I are going to be centre of attention then we are going to look good."

"You're talking about co-ordinating outfits, aren't you?" Blaine sighed, trying to bury his head in Kurt's neck again.

"Never under-estimate the power of co-ordination," Kurt replied, wrapping his arms around Blaine's warm and solid body and holding him close.

*

Whatever ideas Blaine had about Kurt starting school at McKinley, whatever expectations he had, every single one of them wasn't met. There was no press gaggle to avoid that first day, just one guy with a camera sat in a car across the road. Once he had his photo of the two of them arriving together he was happy and off. The photo got limited press and people just accepted the fact that this guy was either Kurt's boyfriend or a good friend.

("Both," had been Kurt's reply when they'd seen the comment.)

He'd fitted into life at McKinley with little more than a few looks and comments during that first week but after that he was just another kid, just another senior, just another glee club member who would have been in line for slushies the same as the others.

Would have been, if it weren't for Blaine's quick thinking when the pair of them were cornered one day after practice. Afterwards he would smile and say that it wasn't his fault if the hockey team were so blinkered as to not have noticed the lack of paparazzi then they deserved to be scared off by the idea that at any point they might be caught doing something they don't want to be caught doing.

They didn't share all their classes but it gave Kurt a chance to get to know other members of the New Directions, form friendships based on more than the fact that he was Blaine's boyfriend.

Blaine Anderson had never been happier. He had a boyfriend (and more than that, he had _the_ Kurt Hummel as his boyfriend), he was on course to do well in his senior year, his application to NYADA was coming along and once he knew which role he was playing in this year's musical he'd be able to complete it and then send it off, entrust his fate to the admission's board.

Auditions for _Grease_ were underway, once again he and Rachel were up for the lead roles, looking to recreate the acclaim their successful performances of Tony and Maria had garnered. That was before Santana declared she was throwing her hand into the ring and that with a "legit star" in their midst maybe the male lead wasn't as set in stone as it had been last year.

Blaine had started to laugh as he turned to face Kurt, a comment about him being done with that forming on his lips, but they both failed when Blaine saw the look on his boyfriend's face. And he knew that he had some serious competition on his hands.

*

"I can't decide what to sing for my audition," Kurt sighed, flicking through a pile of sheet music.

Blaine's gaze flickered across to Kurt's bed to where he was currently sprawled out before he looked back down at his history book.

"Danny's songs are group numbers or duets," Kurt continued, "so I need something that showcases my talents. You and Rachel still doing your joint audition?"

"Hmmm," Blaine hummed, re-reading the same paragraph for the fifth time.

"Unless I get Santana to sing with me. Do you think she would? I mean, she seems driven enough but you know her better than me."

"Ask her."

"You OK?" Kurt asked.

"Fine," Blaine said sharply.

"Blaine—"

"I thought we were studying."

"You're not OK."

"You wanted my help with this history paper but you're more interested in talking about the musical auditions."

"Blaine—"

"I have homework that needs doing," Blaine said, closing the book and reaching for the bag.

"No, we need to talk," Kurt said, getting off the bed and standing in front of him. "Something's wrong and I'm worried that it's something I've done—"

"I thought you were done with all that performing," Blaine snapped. "You told me that you wanted this year off, to be a normal kid and do normal things, and—"

"And taking part in the school musical with the rest of my glee club isn't normal?" Kurt asked. "Or is it the fact that I'm auditioning for Danny?"

"You know how important this is to me. I was lead last year and what's it going to look like if I'm 'T Bird number three' this year?"

"You are not going to be some background character, Blaine," Kurt laughed softly. "You're too good—"

"But I'm not your level of good. I can't compete with you on an acting level and your voice—"

"Blaine," Kurt said, reaching out for him. When Blaine recoiled a little Kurt snapped his hand back in shock. "What...?"

"I should go. You have a song to choose and I've got my own audition to rehearse for."

"Blaine, please..."

"You should sing something classic," Blaine said quietly as he shouldered his bag. "Your voice sounds amazing when you do Broadway numbers. Or the Beatles, but without a big backing track."

"Wait—"

"I'll see you tomorrow," Blaine said before walking out.

*

A quick glance at the screen when the call rang out confirmed that it was, once again, Kurt trying to contact Blaine and Rachel sighed. "Is there a reason you're ignoring him?"

"We're busy."

"Not that busy."

"The auditions are tomorrow and we still need to work out the kinks in the routine."

"We're fine, Blaine."

"This is the finale, Rachel, the closing number. We need to sell the complete relationship to the audience. Well, Artie at least. Last year it was easy to convince people we were in love, now everyone knows I have a boyfriend—"

"So do I," Rachel said without thinking.

"Since when?" Blaine grinned. "So, do I get to meet him?"

"Um..."

"You realise that as your best friend I have to vet all your boyfriends, make sure they are suitable for you."

"Blaine..." she started before looking down. "You've... already met him."

"What? When? Oh, please tell me you're not hooking up with Puck—"

"No!" she exclaimed. "No, I... it's Finn."

Blaine's brow creased in confusion for a moment before his eyes widened. "Finn, as in Kurt's brother Finn?"

"Few weeks now, since you and Kurt started hanging out more and more he and I... We see each other when he's not at college, but I've been up there a few times and..." She stopped at looked up at Blaine. "Are you mad at me?"

"Why would I be mad at you? I actually really like Finn, and from what Kurt's told me I know he's a good guy, so in theory – approval given. But I still feel like I should meet him in an official capacity."

"Oh do you now?" Rachel laughed. "Well he's home this weekend so we should double date. Assuming you're talking to Kurt by then."

"It's fine with me if it's fine with him. Let me know—"

"Oh no, you're talking to him," Rachel said, holding out his phone so that Blaine could see the message announcing '8 missed calls from Kurt'. "Is this about the musical?"

"It's just... I thought he wanted out of that life for a year. He quit, he's taking this year off and now he does this?"

"He's taking this year off to be with you," Rachel said, sitting down next to him and putting her hand on his knee. "You know he's not auditioning to steal this role from you, he probably just misses it."

"I know he does," Blaine said quietly. "He spoke to Mercedes a couple of weeks ago. I overheard him talking, about the movie he shot at the school? He's got to do some publicity stuff for it and he'll be at the New York premiere."

"So?"

"So that wasn't all they talked about. He talked about next year, about filming and... And it just struck me that this is all I have. This year."

"Blaine—"

"Next year I go to NYADA and he goes back to his films and—"

"OK, no," Rachel said firmly. "Kurt really cares about you."

"I know, but—"

"But nothing. Have you two talked about what's going to happen next year?" When she saw Blaine shake his head she smiled. "Then how do you know what's going to happen?"

"I'm just afraid that I'm about to lose everything," Blaine said quietly. "Kurt'll beat me out for the lead, my NYADA application is going to look stupid with my demotion, I won't even get an audition and this time next year you'll be in New York without me and Kurt will be in LA without me and I'll just be stuck here and—"

"Blaine Anderson, you listen to me. Kurt loves you and there is no way he's just going to move to LA when this year is over, not without you at least. If he's going anywhere then I bet he'll want to be in New York with you. He was there before, he can do it again.

"As for the musical, you and I are going to sell Artie a complete package. We will be Sandy and Danny tomorrow and we are going to get those roles. Our NYADA applications will be amazing, so much so that they will offer us places without any hesitation."

"You really think that?"

"New York and Broadway are in our blood, Blaine."

"No, I mean... Kurt. You really think he loves me?"

Rachel's brow furrowed and she gave a soft laugh. "What? He's not...? I mean, I just thought you two... Not a word?"

Blaine shook his head.

"But you love him?"

"You know I do."

"No, I know that you were in 'love' with the guy whose posters you had up in your locker. I suspect that you're in love with the guy whose photos you have up in your locker now."

"Yeah," Blaine said quietly, "I love him. And I don't want to lose him."

"So stop ignoring his calls, talk to him. Maybe he'll surprise you."

"...After the audition," Blaine said. "Because I really want this part."

"More than you want Kurt?"

"Rachel—"

"I am not singing another note with you until you've spoken to him."

"You're serious, aren't you?" Blaine asked. When Rachel held out his phone and glared at him, he sighed. "Fine."

"You'll thank me for it when you're married with two beautiful children and living the high life in LA. Or New York. Somewhere I can come and visit though."

"I think you're confusing us with Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka," Blaine muttered as he pulled up his call menu and hit dial.

"You'll still have cute babies," Rachel said as she got up. "I'm going to go call Finn, set up a time for Saturday."

"You are unbelievable, you know that?" Blaine muttered.

"What?" Kurt asked as the call connected.

"No, not you," Blaine said quickly. "Rachel. She's... I mean, she... Can we start this again?"

"You called me," Kurt said, his voice betraying his hurt.

"Hi," Blaine said, his voice settling into its normal warmth.

"Hi," came Kurt's reply, a little more calm.

"I'm sorry."

"OK."

"About the play, about you going for the lead, for ignoring your calls..."

"Why? I mean, why have you... been the way that you have?" Kurt asked. "Because if this is going to come between us then I'm not auditioning for Danny, I'll be Kenickie or someone else. Or I'll drop out altogether, I don't mind. It doesn't matter to me, not like you do."

"No, don't do that," Blaine said, "if you want to audition then go for it. I'd rather win it on merit than—"

"Oh you think you can win it do you?" Kurt laughed.

"This isn't Hollywood, McKinley is looking for something a little different."

"And you think you can beat me out for a role?"

"Yeah, it's called auditions, y'know?" Blaine teased. "When you compete for a role? No hand-picking here, not like you're used to."

"Oh, that be fightin' talk," Kurt laughed, slipping into a fake accent which only served to make them both laugh for a moment.

"Are we OK?" Blaine eventually asked.

Kurt's humour stopped and he sighed gently. "I wish you'd talked to me before."

"I'm sorry."

"I want to know if I do something, anything, that upsets you."

"Even if I'm being unreasonable? Because of course you should audition for the musical. You're amazing, Kurt. You're talented and you'd be a brilliant Danny."

"Not if it means hurting you. No part is worth that."

"I'll get over it."

"You shouldn't have to."

"I'm serious, Kurt. Audition. Let Artie figure it out."

"On one condition," Kurt said. "You tell me why my brother is talking about a double date with Rachel?"

"Yeah, apparently they're dating."

"Since when?" Kurt asked and Blaine could hear a muffled conversation on the other end.

He looked up as Rachel came back in, phone attached to her ear. "Finn, don't tell him _everything_!" she protested, right about the same time Blaine heard a protest from Kurt.

"So we're double dating on Saturday?" Kurt asked.

"Celebrating, commiserating, one of the two," Blaine said. "I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Coffee before school?"

"Yeah," Blaine smiled, "that would be great."

"See you there."

"First one there gets the table."

"Second one gets the drinks, I know."

*

As is often the case, these things work themselves out.

Even though everyone agreed that Kurt was an amazing actor, this wasn't (as Blaine had pointed out) not Hollywood and the audience would relate to Blaine a little more as Danny. So Kurt landed the role of Kenickie (Santana deciding she can have more fun as Rizzo, even if the "good stuff" was cut out) and rehearsals began in earnest.

The double date that Saturday was full of nerves, on both sides of the table. Brothers and best friends, all seeking some form of approval, reassurance that this wasn't going to be an epic disaster.

Sunday lunchtime, during a 'cooling off' break, Kurt asked Blaine for his honest opinion on the matter. When he'd caught his breath back Blaine had given a half-shrug and said that they seemed to be good for each other. Kurt's worry was that Finn would get railroaded by Rachel and her NYADA dreams; Blaine had said that sometimes you just had to take the time that you had and make the most of it.

Blaine and Rachel divided most of their time between making sure their lines and dances were spot on, and finishing off their NYADA applications. Blaine had wanted to list "boyfriend of award-winning movie star, Kurt Hummel" under 'achievements' which had caused Kurt to laugh, teasing that Blaine only saw him as a prize of some kind, something to further his Broadway dreams.

(There was something about that comment which settled uneasily in Blaine's stomach, but he'll deal with that later.)

From the outside, Blaine Anderson had it all. The lead role in the musical for the second year running; friends who supported him; a boyfriend who had his own fan base; dwindling interest from the press who could only sell so many pictures of them getting coffee, or arriving/leaving school, or out on a double date with Finn and Rachel; and a good chance of getting into the college of his dreams.

On the inside Blaine Anderson had never felt more insecure. Oh, he knew what he was doing in the musical (he had been able to quote _Grease_ verbatim since he was a kid); his friends were what they had always been; Kurt was amazing and fun to be around; he liked reclaiming his privacy (even if the persistent random friend requests on Facebook were still continuing); NYADA seemed to beckon...

The source of Blaine's insecurity can be traced to one night, two days before the play opened. Burt and Carole were out on a date night of their own, Rachel had told Finn he was taking her out, which left Blaine shirtless on Kurt's bed, pinned down under his not inconsiderable weight, and being torn between desire and crippling nerves.

*

This hadn't been planned. Blaine was going to come over for dinner and some study and yeah, Kurt knew there would be some making out involved. But the second his hand had found the hem of Blaine's shirt, the smooth skin underneath? He'd not been able to stop himself. Blaine's low moan of approval was all that he needed to push the material up, exposing his boyfriend's stomach, the clenching muscles under toned skin, just there to be touched and loved and worshipped.

Which is exactly what Kurt did, moving his kisses from Blaine's jaw and neck to the new expanse of skin, hands resting on his hips while his fingers flexed over the rough denim.

"God, Blaine, you're..." he muttered into Blaine's body. "I don't ever want to stop this."

"What? Not even for food?" Blaine laughed, feeling it cut off in his throat when Kurt laughed against his belly. "Kurt—"

"Not for food, water, school, anything. I just wanna stay here, like this, with you."

"I don't..."

"You are perfect, you know that?" Kurt whispered, continuing to kiss his way up Blaine's body, pushing the t-shirt out of the way as he did so. "You are so—damn—perfect."

It was only when he felt the soft brush of Kurt's own shirt against his chest that Blaine registered the fact that his own was no longer on his body.

And then panic well and truly set in.

"Blaine?" Kurt asked, feeling the warm and previously pliant body tense beneath him.

"I can't do this," Blaine said quickly, hands reaching out to push at Kurt, move him away. Kurt complied quickly, sitting on the bed in confusion as Blaine located his top and pulled it on. "I'm sorry, I'm just not... I'm not ready for this."

"Blaine, it's OK—"

"I shouldn't have let you... I know we've talked a bit about this, and we've been taking it slowly, and I'm sorry that you're having to wait for me but I just can't... I can't do this, Kurt. Not now, not like this."

"Blaine, it's fine—"

"I should go," Blaine said quickly, looking around his feet for his bag. "before you decide that having an inexperienced boyfriend is more hassle than it's worth."

"What--?"

"I'm sorry, I am, but this," Blaine said, gesturing towards the bed where Kurt was still sat, "is just... I thought I was OK with it, I thought that I could just... let you lead but I can't. I'm sorry, I—"

"Blaine, please will you calm down and talk to me?" Kurt managed to get out. "Why would you think that--?"

"I can't match up, OK?" Blaine almost yelled. "I'm the stupid, nervous virgin and you're... well..."

"I'm what?" Kurt asked very carefully.

"Experienced," Blaine decided on.

"I'm... experienced?" Kurt asked. "How exactly?"

"...You know."

"Nope, not really," Kurt said, moving so he was sitting on the bed. He folded his arms and stared at Blaine. "Perhaps you'd like to enlighten me."

"I've never done this, any of this before, and—"

"And you think I have?" Kurt asked.

"There were stories," Blaine said, his voice getting quieter, "about you and—"

"I would have thought that you of all people would have known not to listen to stories."

"You said," Blaine protested, "you said yourself about having your boyfriend stay over at your apartment in New York—"

"The only boyfriend, the only _guy_ who spent the night in my bed – while I was in it too – was you, Blaine. It's only ever been you."

"So... you're... I mean, you've not...?" When Kurt shook his head Blaine's stomach fell for another reason. "I just thought—"

"That what? Because I'm not fumbling my way through this that I've whored myself around New York?"

"No, I never said—"

"I've done one bedroom scene my whole career, one. But then you know that, Blaine, it's probably your favourite one," Kurt snapped. "And believe me when I tell you that I was so nervous I nearly quit and ran back here. Thankfully my co-star was a really, really great guy and he talked me through it. It was the most terrifying experience of my whole life and we spent the whole day trying to get it right. By the end of it all I could... get through it without wanting to run, bit like you're probably feeling right now.

"It was, without a doubt, Blaine, the most crippling moment of my entire life and I got through it because I had someone who at least seemed to know what they were doing, someone who seemed to be confident in themselves and I was trying to be that for you. To make this better for you.

"And for the record, getting into your pants wasn't on today's agenda. I'd like to think that we'd talk about that before it happens."

"Kurt—"

"But right now I want to talk about the fact that my boyfriend thinks that I would keep something like my... history from him."

"Kurt, _everyone_ loved you, guys were throwing themselves at you—"

"And so what? You think I just hooked up with them?"

"No, I—"

"Just you, Blaine. First boyfriend, first everything. And that includes first real kiss because I am not counting the ones done in front of an entire crew. They are the least romantic things ever."

"I'm sorry," Blaine said quietly, unsure of what else he could say.

"Me too," Kurt whispered.

"I should go."

When Kurt didn't respond Blaine picked up his bag and left. It was only after he heard the front door shut that Kurt curled up on the bed and silently started to cry.


	9. Chapter 9

The distance between Kurt and Blaine did not go unnoticed but when Rachel tried to broach the subject with Blaine she got a curt response for her troubles. Mike tried to be a bit more tactful about it, offering to buy Blaine coffee after one rehearsal. He agreed on condition that Kurt was a banned topic which made for an uncomfortable start to their afternoon until they started on college choices.

Kurt didn't have the same depth of friendships in the group but he wasn't alone in this; Santana had adopted him (Kurt was still trying to work out if this was a good thing or not) and therefore when she sat next to him after rehearsal he wasn't surprised.

"So we're all apparently trying to ignore the fact that you and Bowtie aren't cuddling up in the choir room anymore."

"Santana—"

"Is it for keeps?"

"What?"

"Have you two split up—"

"No," Kurt said firmly. "We are... We have not split up."

"So what's with the fighting?"

"It's private."

"Which means it's interesting."

"And none of your business."

"Since when has that stopped me?" she grinned. "And unlike some I don't care that you're some big name with millions of fans and millions in the bank—"

"Slight overstatement on both," Kurt sighed.

"Whatever. You realise that ignoring each other isn't going to make it all magically better?"

"I had realised that, yes."

"Me and Britts, we've had our ups and downs. But we talk it through, every time. That is, when I'm not letting my pride get in the way." When Kurt turned to look at her she smiled. "This role a bit of a comedown for you?"

"What? No! No, it's not that."

"Really?" Santana asked, quirking an eyebrow. "Hollywood darling to Blaine's back up? Welcome to McKinley where we live through the Rachel and Blaine show every week."

"Which, if I'm not mistaken, got you to Nationals last year."

"Which, if you remember, we lost. Because your boy was distracted."

"You think I don't know that?" Kurt snapped. "Why does everyone think that this is all just one big game to me? That I'm here just for the hell of it? I want to be here, I want to be with Blaine, and I want to be a normal kid for two minutes while I finish my education. And that includes going for roles in a high school production and not getting them because someone is better.

"And for the record, Santana, I'm pretty used to that. You think that I got all the roles I went for? You think everything was just handed to me on a silver platter because I ticked all the boxes for Hollywood?"

"So what gives? Thought you two were good."

"We were. We are."

"Tell that to the Grand Canyon between you two during class and rehearsals."

"It's private."

"I don't care what it is. These be the facts, Hollywood. Blaine is our star, him and Rachel are our best chance of getting back to Nationals and I am not finishing my senior year without getting that trophy. So you fix whatever it is you broke and we can get our star back before Sectionals."

"Why do you think it's my fault?"

"Because that boy has been in love with you for years now. He was a walking encyclopaedia on you and it was stupid and sickening. Then you two actually went and hooked up and I thought it was going to be a whole world of worse except you two are actually really good together. I knows a good thing when I see it and I sees it with you two."

"He's avoiding me—"

"And you him and you're going around in circles and nothing will be fixed and I am using tomorrow's opening night as a test. If Blaine is not on form then I will lock you two in a room until you sort it out. Sectionals is in a few weeks—"

"I would have thought that you'd have loved to steal the limelight," Kurt quipped.

"Oh, I'm not sayin' I'm not ready," Santana grinned, "and I will take on Rachel for it if I need to. But Britts wants to see Blaine happy. Something about the world needing magic."

"What?"

"If Blaine isn't happy the world is less magical. She says he 'smiles in rainbows' and I swear that if you make some comment about this I will hurt you."

"No," Kurt smiled, "she's... actually right. In a way, I mean."

"So you going to fix this?"

"He—Yes," Kurt sighed. "I will talk to him."

"Before the opening night?"

"No promises."

"Before Sectionals?"

"Yes, before Sectionals."

"Good. 'cause I don't like seeing my girl unhappy. Or my boys."

Kurt's reply was stilled at the compliment and he just smiled and nodded. He grabbed his phone and pulled up his messages.

_I'm sorry. Can we talk? Soon. Kxx_

His finger hovered over the send button for a second before he deleted it. Some things shouldn't be said via text.

*

Life, Kurt decided, was severely unfair. He'd planned to go over to Blaine's that night to talk to him but when he got home after school Carole had been called in for a cover shift at the hospital and so he was left babysitting his dad to prevent him digging into the cakes that had been baked that weekend.

Plan B was to get to school early to see him but Blaine didn't arrive until late morning due to some appointment. (Rachel had been the one to reassure the group that they were not losing their lead the day of opening.) When he did turn up he and Rachel were sequested away in the auditorium for last minute rehearsals and then it was time for the curtain and somehow Kurt still hadn't managed to get five minutes with him.

*

Blaine texted Rachel, keeping the details about his "appointment" vague, and lay back on his bed. He couldn't face English, not with Kurt in the same class. If he went in late enough then he could go straight into rehearsals and he wouldn't have to spend time looking at the one thing that he was scared of losing. That he was about to lose. He'd been stupid and jealous of what? Nothing in the end. Just him and his insecurities and assumptions which had pushed Kurt away. So many times he'd nearly texted Kurt, asked if they could talk, but he knew what was coming when they did talk.

At least now he could still say he had a boyfriend, he was still with Kurt Hummel.

(Oh god, what were the fans going to do to him if – when – they split up? Would he go down in history as the guy who broke Kurt's heart? Would they hate him?)

Right now all Blaine wanted to think about was the play. He had to be perfect so he and Rachel could use the recording for their NYADA applications. Getting up he looked at himself in the full length mirror.

"Danny never had these problems, did he?" Blaine said to his reflection. "Well, except when his stupid pride got in the way." Giving a small laugh he shook his head. "Guess I'm more method than I thought."

Once in school it was easy to avoid Kurt and the first time they locked eyes was from opposite sides of the stage, just as the curtain pulled up.

*

"Rach, I can't see it, are you sure you left it in the wings?" Blaine asked, trying to hold his cell phone to his ear with his shoulder as he dug through the pile of clothing. "I don't see why it's so important, you could just get it tomorrow."

"No, you have to be there now," Rachel said.

"What are you talking about?" Blaine started but then he stopped as he heard another voice.

"No, Santana, I don't see it," Kurt said as he walked out of the wings on the other side of the stage. "You find it yourself, I-- What?"

"I hate you," Blaine muttered into his phone. "You and Santana."

"Shut up and talk to him," Rachel replied as she hung up.

When Kurt looked at the screen on his phone Blaine knew that he'd just received the same treatment from Santana. "We've been set up," he called out, making Kurt jump a little in shock. "Sorry."

"For what? Scaring me or the set up?"

"...Both?"

"Don't really think either of them are your fault."

"Still."

"You were amazing tonight," Kurt said, his voice full of warmth and honesty. "Much better Danny than I could have been. You know, you even convinced me that you were in love with Rachel so there's something."

"We've been friends for years," Blaine said, shrugging off the compliment. "Besides, I want to show that it doesn't matter that I'm gay. I can play any role given to me."

"You know, that's not as big a problem as some people make it out to be," Kurt said. When Blaine gave a small half-shrug Kurt sighed. "You're talented. Insanely so. If Broadway doesn't work out you should try Hollywood."

"Maybe," Blaine said. "Look, about... what happened."

"Don't," Kurt said firmly.

"No, look. I need to say this and then you and I can go our separate ways but I'm sorry. I don't know why I—no, that's not true. I know exactly why I did what I did. Ever since you and I got together, Kurt, I've been waiting for the walls to come crashing down. For you to realise that I'm not... I know what Santana calls you and she's right. You're Hollywood. I'm Ohio and I've got my sights set on Broadway. I have no idea if I'll get there but you? You're already there. Your name is in lights and half the time my History teacher calls me Blair.

"And when we... when you were... I just thought that this was some other way that I don't measure up. I can't compete. And I know it's not a competition but it feels like... Like you're way up here," he said, raising one hand for emphasis, "and I don't even register on the same scale. People will look at you and I'm some footnote.

"You have it all, Kurt. You have the life and the fans and everything. You know what you want, you know what you're doing and you go for it and I can't even figure out what I want to do in the bedroom with the guy I love and so how does that—"

"You love me?" Kurt interrupted.

Blaine stopped, his gaze fixed on Kurt while his heart tried to thud its way out of his chest. "Yes," he whispered. "So much that I go from feeling invincible to paralysed in the time it takes you to walk into a room. But it's OK."

"What?"

"You don't have to, I mean, I'll get over it. You, I mean. I don't want you to think that just because I'm in love with you that—"

"I love you too," Kurt interrupted again, "and I think you'd better stop talking and let me speak now, OK?" When Blaine nodded he smiled. "All the things you said about me, yeah, OK, they could be true. People know who I am, they're still paying attention even now and I know that come the premiere next month it will be the same red carpet and the same fans and the same situation. But you, you of all people, know the difference.

"Do you know one of the first things about you that I fell for?" Kurt asked, moving closer to Blaine. "You saw _me_. You saw Kurt Hummel, son of a mechanic, instead of that kid who had his name in lights before he was eighteen. You told me that you liked that guy more and I got to be him with you and that, _that_ Blaine is where I am."

He reached out and took Blaine's hand, raising it back up. "This isn't where Kurt is, not this one. He," Kurt continued, moving Blaine's hand, "is right here." Kurt pressed Blaine's hand over his own heart, lacing their fingers together. "I don't care what the world sees you as, I don't care if they don't know your name. I care and you are a hell of a lot more than a footnote to me."

Kurt pulled his hand back, missing the contact between them but smiling a little to himself as Blaine kept his hand pressed to his chest for a moment. "I might have an idea about my career and what I want to do but this is the first time I've been in love and I have no idea what I'm doing either. But I do know that I want to do it all with you. Whatever it is we end up doing. And I don't care how long it takes you, me, us to figure it out. There is no rush."

"It's our senior year and then I'll be at college," Blaine said quietly, his hand reaching out for Kurt's. "We don't have much time left this year and—"

"And what?" Kurt asked, feeling Blaine's fingers curl around his. "We move at our pace, Blaine. We do what we want to do when we want to do it. There's no rulebook for this."

"I'd really like one because I have no idea what I'm doing," Blaine laughed.

"Then let's figure it out together," Kurt smiled, moving that little half-step so he was now in Blaine's personal space. "Please?"

"Why is that even a question?" Blaine laughed softly.

"Because your little speech sounded like you were breaking up with me and I'd really like it if that didn't happen and—"

He was cut off when Blaine pressed his mouth to his in a firm kiss.

"So that's a yes?" Kurt asked when they parted.

Blaine nodded. "I meant it, you know. It wasn't how I planned on saying it but... I do love you."

"I love you too," Kurt replied, kissing him again. "I'd be crazy not to. You're the most wonderful, talented and honest guy in the whole of the mid-west. I don't have to pretend with you or be someone I'm not. And I would be honoured if you'd come to the premiere with me."

"What? You mean, the movie?"

"Yes, Blaine, the movie," Kurt laughed. "After all it was because of that film that you and I met. Come with me. Be my date."

"Do I have to do the whole red carpet thing?"

"Not if you don't want to, there's a back way in for others, but I'd like you to. If that's OK."

Blaine's eyes narrowed a little. "This would be me coming out, wouldn't it?"

"I'm going to assume you mean 'as my boyfriend' because otherwise we need to have another conversation," Kurt laughed. "Yes, it would. I want to show the world you are not some footnote."

"This is... huge. Can I think about it?"

Kurt nodded and kissed Blaine again – oh how he'd missed this! – before pulling back. "You coming to the after party? I hear Artie throws a good one."

"I was thinking about just heading home actually," Blaine said.

"Oh. OK."

"You're... welcome to come."

Kurt paused for a moment, taking a deep breath. "You don't have to—"

"I know," Blaine said. "I was just thinking we could... see what happens?"

"If you're not ready for _anything_ —"

"I will. If you will too."

"I promise."

Hand in hand they walked out of the auditorium together.

*

One of the things that had helped Kurt on his rise to the top was his ability to learn whatever was put in front of him at a rapid rate. He'd been given a scene which had been pretty much re-written the night before a shoot and was the only actor who was new-word perfect on the day. When he put his mind to it he could – and would – learn anything he wanted to.

Blaine was something new to learn. In the weeks between the play and Christmas Kurt studied. He learned to read his boyfriend's moods, to know when a hand needed to be offered or when he could steal a kiss. He learned when Blaine was worried over an assignment (or more recently his NYADA application; did it get there, was it good enough, what if he doesn't get a call-back?) and when Kurt could get away with offering help and when he needed space and time. Then there was what he was learning in a more intimate matter; in the last few weeks he had learned much about how Blaine's body reacted to touches and kisses and movements.

Kurt listened to random conversations in the Anderson household which betrayed so many childhood memories and experiences, preferences that were channelled into what was shaping up to be the most perfect Christmas present, even if Kurt did say so himself.

When he was at Blaine's Kurt talked with Blaine's parents not because he wanted to seem polite, but because he was genuinely interested. Because he wanted to know all there was to know about his boyfriend and so he watched and he learned and he asked and he listened.

The problem was that he had been hearing other things, things that would pass by unremarked or seem insignificant if you didn't have the mind for it, if you weren't the kind of person who could take in the little details and hang on to them.

At first he thought that Blaine wasn't aware of what he was saying, that he wasn't thinking about it. But as it came up, again and again, Kurt realised that Blaine knew what he was saying. And more than that, he believed it.

*

"You OK?" Blaine asked as he got out his books. "You've been distracted today."

"Hmm? Oh, yeah, fine," Kurt replied, looking down at the empty page of his notebook where information about Spanish verbs should have been. "Just thinking."

"About?"

"Things."

"Cryptic," Blaine laughed.

"You busy tonight?" When Blaine shook his head Kurt continued. "Can I come over? There's something I want to give you."

"I thought we were doing presents Christmas Eve," Blaine said. "Yours isn't quite ready yet and—"

"It's fine, I wasn't expecting... So can I come over? About six?"

"Sure. Want to stay for dinner? Mom's been going on about not seeing you recently."

"Sounds good."

Blaine let out a steady breath. "Good."

"Good?"

"I just thought maybe you were— Never mind, it's nothing," he dismissed, opening his text book. "What kind of a teacher sets a paper due first week back after the holidays?" he asked.

"One who wants you to get a good GPA," Kurt teased. "Your talent alone won't get you into NYADA."

"You sound like my mom."

"Yes, well, she's right. As am I."

"You are going to be on my case all year, aren't you," Blaine sighed playfully. "Next year I might get some peace."

Kurt's heart clenched a little and he wished, one more time, that Blaine would stop saying that. And maybe after tonight he would.

*

A little before six Kurt pulled up outside of Blaine's house, smiling at how it was already lit up with festive cheer. Blaine's bedroom window, facing out over the street, was the only one which broke with the strictly "Christmas" theme as, in one corner down the bottom, there was a small heart drawn instead of the traditional trees or snowflakes. Kurt had drawn it himself and Blaine had laughed, said that he wanted to keep it for next year.

"As a reminder," he'd said.

That hadn't been the first time.

Kurt had written off that comment to mean a reminder their first Christmas together but as the weeks had passed, since the comments had continued, Kurt knew there was more to it. Since that first night after the play there had been just too many of them; once he'd picked up on them he remembered more and more throwaway moments.

Hence this.

He grabbed the parcel from the passenger seat and climbed out of the car. By the time he'd reached the front door Blaine had opened it, waiting for him. Kurt couldn't help but laugh; Blaine's hands were shoved in his pocket but he was bouncing up and down on the balls of his feet like he was a little child on Christmas Day morning. Which, Kurt reasoned, given the oversized and brightly wrapped parcel in his hands which Blaine's eyes were currently trained on, wasn't too far off the mark.

"Someone's keen," Kurt laughed as he stepped inside, kissing Blaine's cheek in welcome. "Hi."

"Hi," Blaine smiled.

"Something smells good."

"Mom's gone a bit mad. Sorry."

"Don't be. I love your mom's cooking."

"Good. There's loads of it," Blaine laughed, his eyes flicking down to the parcel.

"Come on," Kurt laughed, holding out his free hand to Blaine. "This is not something you'll want to open here."

"What?" Blaine asked, his eyes widening in a combination of shock and intrigue.

"Come on," Kurt repeated, leading him up the stairs.

Once they were in Blaine's room Kurt shut the door behind them and gestured that Blaine should sit on the bed.

"This isn't really your Christmas present," Kurt said, holding the parcel in front of him. "This is... something else."

He held it out and Blaine took it, unable to stop himself from shaking it gently in surprise when he realised how light it was for its size. He put his hand on the top and pulled at the paper, tearing it off to reveal the box inside.

Then his face creased in confusion.

"You bought me a jigsaw?" he asked, looking up at Kurt.

"...Sort of," Kurt smiled. "Open it."

Blaine removed the last of the paper and lifted the lid from the box.

"You bought me a," Blaine started, checking the lid, "one thousand piece jigsaw with seven pieces inside?"

"Sort of," Kurt said again, sitting beside Blaine on the bed. He lifted out the pieces and sorted them in his hand before passing one to Blaine. "Turn it over."

" _The day we met_ ," Blaine read in Kurt's tiny script on the back of the piece before getting the next one. " _The lake. First kiss. New York. ILU. First time. The puzzle._ I don't understand."

"There are nine hundred and ninety three pieces left. Christmas, birthdays, anniversary, Valentine's? That's at least five pieces a year. But there will be other moments and so other pieces to come."

"Kurt—"

"You've been talking a lot about 'this year' and 'the time we have' and about next year you doing this and you being in New York and I realised something. I realised that you think that this is it. That I'm here, with you, for just this year."

"But it is," Blaine said in confusion. "I'll be in New York and you'll be in LA."

"Who said that's where I'll be?"

"You did. At the premiere. You were talking to that reporter and you talked about the opportunities in Los Angeles compared to New York. Mercedes herself said that if you're going to get back into it it'd be better if you were on the West coast and—"

"Blaine!" Kurt said sharply, cutting him off. "I love you."

"I love you too but—"

"No, no buts. I love you and I didn't come here for this one year. I'm not with you for this one year. And this," he said, putting his hand on the box, "is my way of trying to tell you that. One piece for every moment we have had so far and one piece to come for all the moments in our future."

"At five a year that'll take you at least... That's nearly two hundred years."

"Well I think we'll manage more than five a year, don't you?" Kurt asked as he leaned in bump shoulders with Blaine. "But yeah. It'll take me a while."

"So what happens when I get the last piece?"

"Then I buy another jigsaw," Kurt said without hesitation. "And we'll build that one together too."

"Why do I get the feeling that this is a metaphor?" Blaine whispered.

When Blaine turned his head to look at him Kurt he could see the beginnings of tears forming in his eyes. "Because it is," Kurt whispered. "I plan on building a life with you, Blaine Anderson, bit by bit, moment by moment."

"And there was me thinking it was something about missing pieces," Blaine laughed, unable to stop himself from kissing Kurt. "I love you."

"I love you too. So please, no more talk of this being our only year or being on different coasts? I'm planning on going back to New York, with you if you'll have me. There's plenty of work there for me, I'm not going to be some kind of outcast."

"But Mercedes—"

"Works for me, not the other way around. You and me in New York. If you want it."

"Yes," Blaine whispered, kissing him again.

"Good," Kurt muttered into the kiss.

"But your career," Blaine said, pulling back sharply. "I don't want you messing it up for me, Kurt, if you need to be in LA then—"

"Then I can travel. I'll only do stuff close to where we are. Maybe try the theatre option, I hear it's big in New York. I don't know, I'll figure it out. But home? That's going to be New York. It's going to be where you are, understand?"

"You, me, some little apartment somewhere?" Blaine asked.

"If you want."

Blaine paused for a second before nodding. "Yeah."

"You're sure? Living together? Big step."

"Yeah. I want that puzzle piece," Blaine laughed as he leant in for another kiss.

"Every last one, I promise."

"Boys!" called Blaine's mom, shattering the moment. "Dinner's nearly ready."

Kurt whined in protest, his mouth chasing the kiss he'd just lost.

"Come on," Blaine whispered, "we have plenty of time for that later."

"Yeah," Kurt sighed but he couldn't help but smile, "we do."


	10. Chapter 10

Blaine was barely aware of the door shutting behind him and he didn't remember telling his legs to move but it had and they did and then he was on the bed, Kurt laughing softly behind him.

"You OK?"

"Fine," Blaine said. "Just let me sleep for... three years?"

"You have NYADA in the Fall," Kurt said as he climbed up on the bed next to him. "Just saying."

"I'll sleep until then."

"Nationals tomorrow. We need you awake for that."

"I don't like you anymore."

Kurt laughed again and gently carded his fingers through Blaine's curls. "Well I still love you. I'll love you even more when you help win us the championship tomorrow."

"I just don't want to screw it up like last year."

"Yeah, well, last year was... Things are different now."

"Sorry, I didn't mean to..." Blaine started, rolling over so he was on his back. "Sorry."

"It's not your fault. I was the one who messed you about and—"

"You're here now," Blaine said, grasping Kurt's hand. "We get to do this together this year. We get to win Nationals together."

"Yes we do."

"Right now I just want to sleep. I'm sorry."

"Why are you sorry?" Kurt asked, shuffling down the bed so he was lying next to him.

"You got us this room so we'd be alone and—"

"I got us _all_ our own rooms because Mr Schue still thinks that he can put six people into a double room and that's fine. And that's before he decides that because we're gay it's fine to put us in a room with the girls. I like Santana, I do, but I refuse to share with her and you're already asleep, aren't you?"

Blaine hummed but Kurt could tell he was pretty much unconscious.

"Come on, love. Let's get you in bed."

With a little effort on Blaine's part and a lot on Kurt's Blaine was stripped down to his underwear and helped under the covers. Within seconds he was fast asleep and Kurt smiled to himself. He pulled out his laptop and booted it up, logging onto the hotel network.

Graduation was a few weeks away, New York a few months after that and already things were in motion. Mercedes had sent him a list of projects that he might be interested in and it was starting to become very real. Blaine at NYADA, him back on the screen.

When he'd told Mercedes that he was only looking at projects within easy distance of New York City she'd protested, repeated her arguments about Los Angeles and opportunities but he was having none of it. In the end she'd agreed and said that the cost of any plane ticket was not coming out of her percentage.

They'd started to talk about apartments and Blaine had saved a list of potential viewings for Kurt to look at and saved it to his laptop so while Blaine slept (and started to snore gently) Kurt started going through them. By the time he'd loaded the details on the third one he'd made his mind up. With a glance at Blaine's sleeping form Kurt started a new search, finding what he wanted within an hour. By the time Mr Schue's curfew came 'round Kurt was in bed, curled up with Blaine, fast asleep and dreaming of a different New York to the one originally planned.

*

"You're quiet," Blaine said as he took a sip from his coffee.

"Thinking."

"About?"

"The apartments we've seen."

"I know it's not what you're used to but our budget is what it is. If we're going to be equals in this then we need to look at—"

"I know," Kurt replied. "But really. Do you want to live in that last place we saw? Thin walls, screaming neighbours? Or the one where if you turned the shower on you couldn't use any other tap?"

"It's New York, Kurt. You should know this better than me."

"I do know it. And... there's one more place I want to show you. But I need you to promise me that you're going to at least consider it."

Blaine sighed. "Kurt—"

"Look, just come with me to look. Just look, I promise."

"Why do I have a feeling that you've done something you shouldn't?" Blaine asked playfully.

"You know me too well," Kurt replied with a smile, reaching out across the table to grab his hand. "Please? Just trust me."

"I do."

"So you'll come?"

"Only if you'll promise me that the apartment you've picked out is in our budget?"

"Yes," Kurt said.

Blaine's eyes narrowed. "Really?"

"Really."

*

As soon as the cab pulled up outside the building Blaine knew that Kurt's version of the truth was nowhere near his.

"Kurt—"

"You promised you'd come and look."

"You promised this was in budget. _There's a doorman_."

"You promised you'd listen."

"When? I never said that."

"It was implied."

"Well I'll be clear. No."

"Blaine, please," Kurt said, stopping just outside and signalling to the doorman that they needed a moment. "You can't tell me you'd be happy living in any of the places we saw today. I know you, I know what you _feel_ like when you're happy and you weren't today. So please, come and look and listen and if you still don't want it then I promise we will walk away and choose between showering and doing the dishes."

"...Fine," Blaine sighed.

He said nothing on the short elevator ride, only spoke his name when they met the realtor, and tried to pay attention as she talked about square footage and natural light but he was just lost in the _completeness_ of the apartment.

Newly renovated, everything matched (and worked). High enough to get some natural light through the windows, not so high as to have a view of the Park and therefore the insane price tag to go with it. He stopped going along with the tour and just stood in the middle of a living area that was bigger than the bedroom of the last place they'd seen.

This was too much. He remembered Kurt's old apartment, how he'd felt so small there among the space and the simple decadence of it all. This was a place where a star lived. This was somewhere where Kurt belonged, not Blaine. Not some kid from Ohio whose idea of fancy was when they used chopsticks with the Chinese takeout.

This wasn't his life, this wasn't him and suddenly the walls were closing in on him despite all the space and he tried to remember to breathe.

"Blaine?"

Kurt's voice and hand made him jump and he stumbled back a little, the walls righting themselves and his lungs remembering their function.

"You OK? She's giving us some space to talk about it and—"

"This is... This is too much. No, Kurt. No."

"Blaine, please, you haven't seen—"

"You said if I said no—"

"You said you'd listen."

"Fine," Blaine said, folding his arms. "I'll listen."

"The fees and utilities are within our budget, actually less than it so there's money we can save and put towards... other things. The open plan has great acoustics for when you've got songs to rehearse and enough space that we can push the furniture out of the way for dance practice.

"Master bedroom with ensuite and a closet big enough that we can _both_ put our things in it and the second room will make a perfect nur—office," he corrected quickly, "or spare room or whatever we want to do with it because it's ours. The shower works in the main bathroom and the toilet isn't constantly running – I swear I thought that first apartment had a water feature when I heard it.

"This isn't just somewhere we can live while you study at NYADA, Blaine. This is a home. I want this to be our home, somewhere we can build our lives along with your jigsaw. Somewhere we can—"

"Have a kid for that nursery you almost didn't talk about?" Blaine asked.

"I didn't mean... I just... She said nursery and I think she assumed that... Fine. Yes. Kids. One day. You, me, a family. I'm thinking about it. Is that a bad thing?" Kurt asked, reaching out to put his hands on Blaine's arms. "That I look at you and I see a future? That's what this is. Our future."

"In your apartment."

"Our apartment."

"Your money, your apartment."

"You think I wouldn't put your name on it too? Blaine, I'll only put your name on it if you want. This isn't about... No, wait, it _is_ about the money. I have it and I'm sick and tired of trying to pretend that I don't because you have this romantic notion about us being equal in this. I worked hard for every cent and besides what Dad and Finn and the business got I saved it. I knew that one day I'd want to build a life for myself, hopefully with someone, and I wanted to be in a position to do that.

"Now I've got the guy I want to spend the rest of my life with and I want to be able to make sure that we have the life that we want."

"I wanted to come here with my boyfriend," Blaine said quietly. "Not with my keeper."

"Blaine..." Kurt started as he walked away, sighing as he heard one of the bedroom doors shutting.

*

It was only when Blaine had shut the door that he realised this was the second bedroom. The realtor had called it a potential nursery and it was an idea that Kurt had latched onto. Blaine would be lying if he said that he hadn't been thinking about it too but he wanted them to do this together and right now he felt like he was coming to New York by Kurt's leave.

His phone chimed with a text – Rachel wanting to know how the apartment hunting was going – so he called her in response and brought her up to speed.

"Let me get this straight," Rachel said calmly. "Kurt has supported you through the whole NYADA process, refused to even let you consider LA drama schools – for which I am grateful because otherwise I'd be there on my own and that was not what we planned – and is prepared to move with you, even though his career would be better served on the other coast.

"He sees the apartments you picked out, apartments you yourself admit to being horrific, and then shows you what sounds like the most beautiful place that he wants to buy, for both of you. A home he called it.

"He loves you enough to quit acting for a year and move back to Ohio, go to public school and deal with paparazzi. He takes you to premieres and walks up the red carpet with you, hand in hand. He let slip about thinking about having a family with you one day and you are... what? Complaining to me?"

"I'm not complaining, Rach—"

"Yes you are. Now I love you and I am so glad we both got into NYADA so I don't have to do this by myself, but I promise you that if you do not accept this apartment I will kill you and then I will move in with Kurt."

"Rach—"

"Kurt wants to spend forever with you, Blaine. Have you figured out what that means? That means you'll get married and have kids and everything that he has he wants to share with you. And that, you lucky boy, includes his bank balance."

"You know that's not why I love him."

"No, so don't let it be the reason you screw it up."

"Don't they usually do pre-nups in this kind of situation anyway?" Blaine asked.

"You think Kurt would ask you to sign one?"

"No," Blaine said immediately.

"Then I think you know what you need to do. Or you can tell him to buy it anyway and Finn and I can live there?"

"Finn's at OSU."

"I'll live there, he'll visit. Details."

"I'd feel bad. Me here, you in dorms—"

"I'll survive. And until that spare room is occupied by the first of your many beautiful children I can come stay right?"

"Of course," Blaine laughed. "Whenever you want. Open invitation. Probably get you a key cut."

"Do you hear yourself?" Rachel asked. "You're talking like you already own the place."

"I... I'm going to own an apartment."

"Yes you are, sweetie."

"I'm going to have an apartment. In New York City. In a building with roof access from which you can see the park."

"Really?"

"I don't know. Maybe. They do in all the movies. I'm actually disappointed at the lack of outside fire escapes actually, this is not what I was promised by Hollywood."

"No, but you were promised the great romance."

"You really think Kurt's—"

"Don't you even ask me that," Rachel said. "You and I both know the answer to that."

"Yeah."

Rachel gave a soft laugh. "Go talk to Kurt. Make him happy. Make both of you happy."

"Love you."

"Love you too," she said before hanging up.

*

Kurt had felt entirely awkward waiting in an apartment that wasn't his (and wasn't likely to be either at this rate), waiting for Blaine. But he'd wait however long it took. When the door opened he jumped to his feet and then tried to look like he wasn't nervous and scared and hesitant and expectant and a million other emotions he'd not been able to name yet.

"If you want to go we can go," Kurt said when Blaine remained silent. "I just... I wanted you to see that we have options, OK? And if it's not here then we'll find somewhere we like. I promise. And pay whatever we can."

"Even if we end up in a shoebox?" Blaine asked.

"Even then because I'll be with you and that is all I want."

"So the open space, perfect for parties and networking? The acoustics and dance floor and spare room for our kid?"

"You. That's all."

"This is... so generous, Kurt. Really generous."

"Who else am I going to spend it on? But if it bothers you that much I can put it in trust or something? Set up charity funds for kids like us who are high schools which aren't as understanding. I don't know and I don't care because—"

"I get the picture," Blaine said. "And it's just... I need to say two things, OK?"

"OK," Kurt said nervously.

"One – it's in both our names and every bill is fifty-fifty."

Kurt nodded, biting his lip because he was afraid that his hope was about to be crushed.

"Two – the kid issue. Now I don't know what you expect but I, Kurt Hummel, am a bit of a traditionalist and so we are getting married first before we even _think_ about starting a family."

"Are you proposing?" Kurt asked in shock. "No, wait, are you saying _yes_ to the apartment?"

"Maybe. And yes. I mean, yes to the apartment and... I don't know. We've just graduated high school, I figure we have some time."

"Well, yeah, we do, but now you've put the idea out there and I'm already thinking colour schemes and locations and button holes."

"What do you want to do? Set a date?" Blaine laughed.

"Well I don't want to be one of those people who are engaged for years."

"I was thinking this side of our thirtieth."

"What's wrong with next summer?" Kurt asked in excitement.

"I'll have just finished my freshman year. I'll want a break not a wedding."

"So we'll have a holiday."

"Good."

"Only I think they're called honeymoons."

"We won't be able to legally drink at the reception," Blaine pointed out.

"We will be in two years' time."

"Fine. Two years."

"So to recap," Kurt said, moving towards Blaine with a huge grin on his face. "We are getting this apartment, getting married in two summers' time, and then we're getting a kid. Or having. We should talk pros and cons about surrogacy verses adoption."

"You make the three biggest decisions we'll ever make sound like a shopping list," Blaine laughed as Kurt moved within reach. His arms slid around Kurt's waist, pulling him in that little bit closer. "Things We Need."

"Things We Need For Our Forever," Kurt added.

"Well, I wish that this is the start of a very long forever," Blaine whispered before they kissed.

*

Rachel had _finally_ gone back to her dorm room, sent on her way with Blaine's promise to meet her for pre-first day coffee at this little place on Fourth Avenue they'd found. She said goodnight to her best friend with a hug and a kiss and a whispered we finally made it in his ear. After seeing her out and into a cab Blaine returned to where Kurt was still sitting in the window seat.

Kurt moved when he returned, letting Blaine sit behind him and wrap his arms around his chest, holding him close.

"Nervous about tomorrow?"

"A little," Blaine admitted. "But it'll be fine, I'm sure of it."

"Sure it will."

"Do I get a puzzle piece for it?"

"Is it _our_ moment?" Kurt teased.

"You're telling me that this whole summer has only earned me two pieces? The apartment and the not-quite-engagement-so-we're-not-telling-people?"

"Yup," Kurt said. "First home together, and The Talk about our future."

"I hate you," Blaine said, pressing a kiss into Kurt's hair.

"I know."

"You know, for all the dreams I had when I was growing up, all the... things I thought about you – the famous you, not this you. The real you I mean – and all the planning Rachel and I put into getting to NYADA, getting here, I never thought I'd end up here."

"What? In New York?"

"Yes. No. All of it. NYADA, New York... You. Everything."

"I never thought I'd end up like this either," Kurt said, his fingers tracing patterns over Blaine's hands. "It was just a film to get me closer to home, see my dad for a while. It was not supposed to be something that was going to... redefine my life."

"Do you believe in fate?" Blaine asked.

"I don't know. Maybe?"

"I was thirteen when I came out," Blaine said, "and I lost a few friends over it so by the time my birthday came around I had convinced myself that it was going to be the worst one ever. Anyway, I think Cooper knew because he came home and first thing in the morning he came into my room with one of those giant cupcakes and a candle.

"He told me to make a wish and, being the lonely and newly-out kid I was, I wished for a boyfriend. It wasn't until halfway through first period, which happened to be English, that I realised I'd wished for _a_ boyfriend. One. And not that I really thought wishes came true but then I convinced myself that because of semantics I was going to be really lonely.

"At lunch the few friends who'd stuck by me also bought me a cake. I thought about changing my wish but I figured I could just be more specific. So I wished that when I got my singular boyfriend that we would be madly in love.

"Of course when I went home Mom and Dad had a third cake and there was a third wish but..."

"But what?" Kurt asked when Blaine stopped. "What was the third wish?"

"I got my first two," Blaine whispered. "I got a boyfriend and I am so in love with him."

"He's pretty in love with you too," Kurt laughed. "So what was the third wish?"

"I can't tell you."

"Blaine!"

"No, because if I do then it might not come true and I seem to be on a pretty good roll here."

"So when do I get to find out what that wish was?" Kurt asked.

"At the end."

"The end? End of what?"

"Just... the end," Blaine said, his voice heavy and tinged with sadness.

It took Kurt a moment to work out _when_ Blaine was talking about. When he did it wasn't as long before he worked out what he was talking about, what that third wish had been. Made on a fourteenth birthday when all he wanted was to be loved for who he was, to have the kind of life that his parents and grandparents and great-grandparents had.

"I think we can work towards that," Kurt said quietly.


End file.
